[Margoms]

Thank you for the welcome Sunbeam,
I've felt welcome and at home here since I "accidently" found this site on Sunday morning. "Seek and ye shall find". I think once we open our hearts and really ask for help we see that it's been there for us all along. I am gaining a lot of acceptance of my problem since I found this forum. Although I've been aware of it for some years, there have been better times and worse times in terms of the AL abuse. I'm more of a binge drinker in social situations than at home, so it's been easy to return to denial when the problem isn't actively presenting. This time, something is different, something made an impression. I realized that I don't like the image of myself as an "out of control party girl" any more. There's more to me than that and I want to stop dimming my light with AL. I am taking some time out from AL this week to see how it feels. So far, no big social obligations, just at home with hubby, so it's been easy. I have several big social commitments in July that are going to be very challenging including a 10 day visit from my sister to celebrate our joint birthdays. She is coming to share her break from law school with me and will want to drink wine and have fun. I am planning to do the best I can with this, but know that I may not yet have the tools to do this AF. I'm okay with that. What I am planning to do is this:
1) Log in here every day, drinking or not and be honest
2) Keep reading the book and taking the supplements
3) Try to moderate - I've made a plan but haven't tried it yet
4) Stay on my exercise program, rest and eat well
5) Hope my tapes get here soon!
6) Stay out of denial and prepare to go completely AF if necessary in August.

I get tears in my eyes every time I log on to this site because I relate so much to everyone's struggles and joys and it's so amazing to have a place to just tell the truth without fear of judgement. I know I'm just starting out on this journey, but I think I've chosen my fork in this road and it feels good to be on the right path. Thanks for letting me ramble.