Oh Sassy,
We all have had times like this and the self loathing that goes with it. What we put our loved ones through is enough to shame us all into the next millenium. But still we soldier on. I totally relate to your sensing that your drinking problems weren't as bad as others. Most of us have felt that way at least once. There's always someone who's problems are worse than ours. That little sense of superiority is our ego talking and when it does, we should shut it up! There's nothing like a good f**k up to make us humble!
So now that the event is past, take some stock. What were the triggers to excess drinking? What frame of mind did you enter the event with? How can you change that for the next time? If (I should say when) you get a handle on this and get al to stop calling you by name, it will have a positive effect on your self esteem. And that, dear Sassy, is a very attractive quality which any observant bf will certainly notice. Use this time in your wonderful, young life to affirm the wonderfulness that is you. It will make for a happier Sassy and a stronger long term relationship with your man. Success is what helps build our self esteem. Start looking at all the successes you've accomplished, and add AL to the list. You're well on your way. I know you'll make it. You sound so very intelligent.
Vera-b.
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