Thanks Marbella.
Was just trying to clean out my youngest daughter's room. She just graduated high school and instead of going to the college that I had helped her enroll in, she decided in July to move in with another family. She thinks that they will offer her the structure and religious support that she didn't get here. That hurts so much! And I know that I did fail her in many ways because of my drinking. I have made so many stupid, stupid decisions that sometimes I just can't believe this is my life!
It just hurts so much to go through her "little girl" things and then her angry adolescent things, and know that I let her down. And so, of course, I want to drink b/c it hurts....
O.K....will return now to the lavender room of lost dreams and disappointments and try to clear a way for the future.
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