Anxiety and Dog Hair

[noma'am]

Hi. I feel so anxious this morning. I'm anxious because I am drinking and drinking because I'm anxious. Smoking to. Smoking! Shame shame on me. I am ashamed that I am drinking and drinking because I'm ashamed. The smoking, well I'm just doing that because I'm an idiot. But, it does make me look cooool. Anyway, about the dog hair. I'm referring to the hair of the dog that I am drinking because of how much I drank yesterday. I don't actually have a dog but I do have a headache. I feel very much like a little gerbil on it's little wheel, running as fast as it can around and around and around. It is fun though. This little wheel can go really fast once you get it going.

[keeta]

noma'am,

Though your post is glossed over in humour,(which is often a defense mechanism for pain), I hope you are really ok?
Can you stop drinking at this point...switch to water...tea, coffee, AF beer or wine, to trick your mind you haven't stopped?...Not sure what time it is where you are. I too suffer anxiety, so I can relate. It is a horrible feeling, and so hard to keep it in check. I have also self medicated with alcohol for it.

I have no great words of wisdom, as I am back to day 2, but wanted you to know you are not alone in your struggle.
I am around for the next hour or so if you want to post, or chat.

hugs,
K

[Gia]

I find alcohol makes my anxiety worse as well. I hate drinking when I'm full of anxiety, I find more things to worry and stress about..and there are lots!
Load up on the water, gatorade. Eat lots of good food, treat yourself out to your favourite meal.
I hope you feel better soon...

[Bandit]

Noma'am,
I really felt like that a few days ago, had a really bad week last week of drinking and kept having the hair of the dog to make myself feel better. That combined with worry about a job thing I thought I was going to have a full blown panic attack, felt so anxious all the time, especially early in the morning. Can so relate to that gerbil in a wheel and getting no-where.
Keeta's suggestion to try and switch to something AF is a good idea. I am on Day 3 AF again today and feel like my head is about to explode. I am going to get a bottle of AF wine just to try and help me with this evening.
I do so hope you feel better and just try to get off that wheel - we all know too well how it just keeps going round and round.

Bandit

[Cinders]

noma'am,

I have never made this recommendation before to anyone on this site.

But you sound pretty desperate.

Please call AA, see when a meeting is, ask them if they can find someone to pick you up and bring you back home. They will do this. Trust me.

I think you might need a break from house/isolation/drinking/self-hatred. I believe truly you need to be with others like us, alcoholics, who are working at staying sober.

I go to AA. Not often enough but the face-to-face helps. You may not like the program or believe in it and that is okay. But just the fact of talking to others in a room can be very healing all by itself.

They will all have been right where you are now.

I hope you take this suggestion. I really do.

You need some mechanism of getting out of that wheel you are in right now.

Love,
Cindi

[DeeBee]

Hi Noma'am,

Hang in there!! Try and switch to a refreshing iced tea or lemon water. Take a looong bath/shower, even if it's in the middle of the day... you'll feel refreshed!

[Nurseindistress]

Hi all,

I have had the worst past 2 days. Drinking more than I ever have before. I feel so bad, I have never had a hangover like this. A family issue got me started with the drinking. Now, of course, I feel worse than ever. Boy do I hate myself right now. I wish I could "fast forward" and be in a better place. I will never do this again!!!!! I SWEAR. I HATE alcohol. I HATE myself for doing this, for being here, for wasting my life. It has to stop here.

[Boss.man]

My dog was barking this morning, early! At 5:30 or so. I think I'll get a bark collar today so it will zap her while I snooze. And I don't sit on my couch, because the hair-of-the-dog needs to be brushed off it first!

One step at a time noma'am and nurse. Write a note to yourself about how you feel right now. And then look back on it in a day or two.

[Frogzter]

I really feel for you for I know exactly how you feel. Maybe try to get off the wheel for a while and eat... eat... eat and drink lots of water. This will help. The suggestion of AA sounded good as you will be with people who will accept you and understand no matter what... been there done that type of thing... no judgement just support.

Hope you feel better soon!

[Larisa]

Hi, no ma'am,

I've been following your posts since you got here (not long after I did). You are certainly strong in your resolution when you set your mind to something - I remember how you said, I'm quitting drinking today. I have to confess I didn't think you really would - you know, because I hadn't been able to! But you did, even started on a weekend and kept sober quite a while - amazing. I know you're drinking again now, but I just wanted to tell you that I was really impressed - I've never been able to do it until I got here and got the meds, etc. to help me. You sound so down now, and I don't know if I've felt the same, but I bet I've been close. Anyway, it's clear that there is a hell of a lot more to you than a drunk ex-or-current-pudgy-trophy-wife - nobody with your strenght and your sense of humor is going to let fucking alcohol get the best of her.