how its done

[Sunbeam]

One thing that I've come to realize about this kind of conversation is that those saying modding can't be done HAVE to think that, or else it becomes an option for them. They have already learned that it doesn't work for them. FunnyGirl, from what you have posted that seems to be where you are at.

[Eve11]

Ask and Funny Girl,

You both have valid points. I think it's always a good idea for any new person to quit for 30 days to clean their body and head.

I think the basic thing about being able to mod is that one cannot be a chronic drinker who has built up a tolerance to alcohol whereas one or two drinks wouldn't have any kind of an effect on them. One recent poster stated his tolerance was so high that he needed 6 drinks just to feel a slight buzz. For me, I would be totally wasted on 6 drinks.

Moderating is always a nice thought but it is a lot of work. Someone else posted how they got so tired of thinking about the next time they could have a drink. Sometimes I experience that as well where I'll be thinking "Ok, I had my 4 drinks over the week-end and now I won't be having a drink until next Friday (if there are no week-day dinners out or events planned) and it is kind of a drag to be thinking like that. When I quit alcohol and was free of it for 7 years, you know life just went on and I had fun and I wasn't thinking about that next drink like I do with modding. So, yes, modding is a lot of work. Folks just have to figure out whether it can work for them or not. And no shame if it can't. IMHO it is difficult to do and is a lot of work.


Eve11

[Funny Girl]

Sunbeam - I didn't say it couldn't be done - but I do think if you can't quit for a short time after drinking whatever you deem as "too much", then it's unlikely you'll jjust cut back. If you can - hey - great - you're a better person than I am.

Bottom line is, that if you're always thinking about driking, you have a problem - it's interfering with your life. if it wasn't & it was simply something you could "take or leave" you wouldn't be here. . . .

[Eve11]

Originally Posted by Funny Girl

Bottom line is, that if you're always thinking about driniking, you have a problem - it's interfering with your life. if it wasn't & it was simply something you could "take or leave" you wouldn't be here. . . .

I agree with that Funny Girl. I know in many ways I am often thinking about drinking.

Just thinking about when I can have the next one is a prime example. I guess we would agree (at least I will) that we do all have problems because we wouldn't be here if we didn't...that's true.

I still think there's a difference though with a few folks being able to moderate and most that cannot. Many will try and fail but you know what? They got their foot in the door of finding help for themselves so they just had to take baby steps to eventually quit drinking.

And for those few where moderating works? Well, they are people with drinking problems because they can't just "take it or leave it" like someone without a problem at all. But at least they've cut down consumption, aren't a risk drinking and driving anymore, aren't making fools of themselves at parties/events anymore etc...how out of control can you get on 2 drinks right?

But it is a lot of work for sure, a lot of thinking about drinking, etc. and that's why many choose to not put all that crazy effort into it and eventually go AF.

Interesting discussion for sure!!


Eve11

[Funny Girl]

Eve - love the quote about the elevator to success . . .mine sure is . . .

[spuddleduck]

been af 7 days YIPPEE!! been out twice for sober lunch this week and soooo enjoyed the food. usually i would be drinking the wine, looking at how slowly my company was drinking, working out how i can have a sneaky one (going to loo and getting swift one on the way) or maybe just saying sod it and getting a bottle just for me. basically i was just thinking about drinking, sure i was rotten company.... only part of me was there, the other part was listening to AL. bloody stupid really. hope i can keep it up.

[Funny Girl]

Congrats Spuddleduck - this is my 7th day as well! I've noticed I've really been enjoying my food too! (maybe a bit too much!!) Last night I had some wonderful Indian food & it was just like a 'party in my mouth' - I think I could taste every last spice used in my dish. I loved it. Now I just hope I don't get fat! (actually, that probably won't happen given the amount of calories in all of the alcohol I was drinking all the time) I'll think of you on my way into Day 8!

[BELIEVE]

7 days is great! Congrats on that and keep it up. Also you are working through situations sober where you used to drink, thats a huge step. Keep doing what you're doing and you'll have al's ass kicked before you know it

Also I want to clear something up here rel quick. I'm not saying modding can't be done, it most certainly can be done. I've been modding for some time now. Mostly AF but I can drink when I want, and there's lots of others who can do the same, or maybe drink a little more frequentley but have fewer drinks or whatever modding looks like to different people.

What I AM saying is that modding probably isn't going to work if you can't stop in the first place. If you don't learn how to put on the brakes you'll probably just go outta control and somepoint and wind right back up at square one.

So please don't take anything I say as discouragement, its anything but. I want to see everyone win their personal battle with al, whether that victory comes in the form of modding or just kicking al out of your life forever. Sorry if I came off as negative, I'm just sharing whats worked for me and what I've seen work for others.

[frances]

Ask for help - thanks for the welcome back. I definitely did OK at first the last time I was here; glad to be back and trying again! It's funny, some mornings I've been waking up feeling heavy-headed and thinking I drank too much the night before, and then realize 'that's right - I've stopped' - then I realize it was just my "waking up" feeling and I feel great! It truly is nice not feeling bad from drinking so often. On the discussions about modding - I can certainly see how just deciding to go AF for good would work best for many - it is true that while I was modding last time it was practically all I could think about. That's why this time I'm thinking maybe to set a rule for myself only to drink on special occasions - when out with friends, for example - that doesn't happen that often so it would qualify as 'special' for me. Then, I wouldn't be thinking about it every day and trying to figure out how many I can have and when I can have the next one. It might also help me to avoid getting back into the daily (over) drinking mode like I did last time. I can see myself, once a 'going out' plan is made, obsessing over looking forward to a drink though. That might not be such a good thing. Well, we'll just have to see how it all works out. It's great to come here and see what others are doing! On day 12 here by the way and feeling good!

[CAM2575]

Hi everyone.

Just going through the posts and I think everyone brings up some really good points. I myself am on my 2nd week of attempting to mod.
My question is for the non-modders. Are any of you taking topamax?
Just curious because I am trying to follow the MWO program and if if you are following the MWO program and it is not working for you, I would like to hear more about that. My ultimate goal is to get control of my life back and I want to be prepared for any "bumps in the road" if you know what I mean. I appreciate anything you are willing to share!