15 December 2007 - Neil hits two years

[about time too]

Neil,

Today is a special day. This is your day. A day just for you. A day to celebrate.

I looked up feast days of today.. and Neil, you might like this guy. His day is today also - he is Paul of Latros - a Byzantine hermit. Paul was, the son of an officer in the Byzantine army. He became a monk in a community on Mt. Olympus in Greece, with his brother, Basil. Paul later left the monastery and became a hermit on Mount Latros in Bithynia, Asia Minor. Soon he attracted followers, and Paul was compelled to organize them into a laura, or community. After twelve years, Paul went to live in a cave.

Do you know Nero was also born on this day - and Gustaf Eiffel (of the tower) - its the day of the bill of rights - as stated by Roosevelt. Its also the birthday of L. L. Zamenhof, the initiator of Esperanto. It is the most widely celebrated day in Esperanto culture. Some Esperanto-speakers, not wanting to over-celebrate the achievements of a single man, have suggested celebrating December 15th instead as Esperanto Literature Day. Thus they encourage Esperanto organizations that hold gatherings on that day to add a book review or poetry reading to the program or to announce the publication of a new book. On an individual level, one can buy a book or start reading a new book or in some way celebrate Esperanto literature on that day.

I dont know much about Esperanto, but I like the idea of continual growth in his day.

Really, Neil, more than these famous people, the 15 December is a day where I think of a guy who woke up and decided to face himself and his life and to change it. Its a day when the warrior in you was awoken and I"m privileged to know you.

I salute you.
Brigid

[irishlady]

Neil, what more can I add to what Brigid has already said. Since joining MWO you have been my inspiration, just reading your posts has helped me more than you will ever know on my journey..

I couldn't imagine how you must have felt when you reached your first year of being AF, but, when I reached mine, then I knew what that feeling was like. Now, to have reached your second, well, that must feel so damned good, I can't wait..

We each of us approach this road to abstinence in our own way, and I know that your journey has, at times, been a hard one, and that is why you are such an inspiration to all of us, because when the going gets tough, do you give up??, NO, you just dig your heels in, look for another way round whatever is blocking your progress and carry on. Well, I for one am following in your footsteps, and you are blazing such a trail for all of us that failure is not an option.

Congratulations Neil, and just a thought, you are now entering your THIRD year of being alcohol free.

With much love,
Louise

[xtexan]

Brigid:

Thank you so much for your thoughtful, and kind words.

Today has been a day of deep reflection in many ways. I did not know of those things happening on this date. You are a fellow warrior with much wisdom and purity.



Louise:

What can I say, but I am so very pleased that you find help from my sometimes-meandering words. Thank you for your words of support and kindness to me. It really goes both ways, and that is a wonder.



I guess those of us who find our way this far down the road, share a lot of the same battle scars. Those of us who drank for so many years, that it became a way of life deeply ingrained. The drinking became like a terrible tattoo on our souls, at first new and something different, and only much later, did it become ugly, discolored, and a deep and shameful mark.

The things I have been considering on this day have been subtle and varied. For instance, I am taking a long break from the exercise regimen, looking for any signs that it may have become a substitute addiction. I don’t believe that is the case. It seems like the things that are good for me, I really can seem to moderate with some common sense.

The last few days, have found me going into extremely deep meditations, searching into crevices where I have not ventured but once or maybe twice. The core, as it were, of what manifests itself as your xtexan or Neil.

I really am filled with new hope for this third year. Much literature on addiction and dependence writes of the first three years, and then leaves off. We have read on this forum of the “three years of hell”, and this I think about often.

I mean, what resolutions are there to make? I mean really? I have given up all the things that were poisoning me. Alky, tobacco, sugar, fried food, etc. I have been exercising in a manner that has benefited me, and I am at the perfect weight for my height. NO RESOLUTIONS TO MAKE FOR 2008? Not so.

If there is a resolution for rapidly approaching year-end, it will be become at peace with myself somehow, someway. True, deep, spiritual peace. The place where if there are any unanswered questions, there will not be anger or disappointment at not being able to find the answer, but acceptance I can live with. Perhaps more on this in the coming year.

Oh, and I still can’t see those ab muscles, and have not yet run my 10K. I'm betting I can make those goals by 2009.



To all of you reading this, who may be just new to your AF life, and recently sober, hang in there. You will never believe just how complete, and satisfied with life you can really become until you make the leap of faith. When I started two years ago, I had no idea of the things that awaited me. Sure, there have been some terrible storms along the way, but I had armor, and I had friends. I had you folks to always turn to and say, “Damn this is rough, but it IS WORTH IT!” Just being able to say that, and have you know and realize and empathize, kept me going through the worst of the storms. Thank you so much my friends at MWO. Thank you RJ for this wonderful forum.

As always, be well.

Neil

[irishlady]

Ah, acceptance, that is the start of so many things, accepting that I am an alcoholic was the start of this journey for me..

[Accountable for Me]

OH, there you are, Neil! I thought you were MIA!

CONGRATS TO YOU! You are such an inspiration here! Love you to bits!