My First Sober Year

[Cinders]

I have beautiful grandchildren that love me and want me around.

I have a husband whose eyes and face gets pinched and sad when I do these things.

I have people who LOVE ME.

And I have all of you.

I will slay this beast come hell or high water. I will.

Love,
Cindi

[KateH1]

Cindi, Sobriety will come to you. I know you are in Vermont right now...I hope you are taking a lovely walk and contemplating how wonderful this is going to be! May you have a restful nights sleep and a magical day tomorrow!! You know, you will be so gently on all of our minds!xxxx

I no longer tell my stories of how I was when I was drunk.......don't want to give that old behavior any energy!! But, I will say this, I know, bruises, cuts, scrapes and every sort of bodily injury from drinking. I was a cheerful, sociable buzzed person, but, all to quickly my head would spin around and I became somone else entirely! I did it ALL! And...I Do Mean ALL.......and I am so very sorry and horrified that I ever allowed it to go on for as long as it did!! I tried and I tried to moderate, and I promised myself thousands of times that I would stop......but it continued for years! I honestly thought that I would die a disgusting alcoholic.

But, I found My Way Out, instead!! I read RJ's book, through my hat in the ring here, and I worked my little Arse off! I also joined hands with so many here, Mags, Don, Star, Satorie, WW, MM, Livingfree, Determinator, 12many, Believe, and yes, you too, Cindi! All the wacko's in members who made me laugh! The list goes on and on....bottom line.....this place works so many miracles...soft, hard and in between!

Carpe Diem All!!
xxx Kate

[soberlady115]

ZM, thank you for the encouragment. I am so discouraged right now, cannot go an evening without wine and its not that I drink too much everytime, its just I cannot seem to get past going through the motion of sitting down with Husb. every stupid night and drinking before dinner and after. I find myself loathing me. We have a lot of stress right now with Grown Son living with us due to severe Health issues as heart failure and stroke due to a virus. We arethankful we have him and he survived and helping him in everyway now we can. Having him here and helping him is not the issue, its the fact I feel at the end of the day I have to have wine to cope and then feel like a failure in the am. My Husb. supports whatever decision I make, but its hard to see him pour good wine and not want to sit with him and talk with mine and its hard when at the end of our busy days not feeling somehow entitled to this short pleasure and it stops body aches and smooths out rough spots for a few hours.and just draws me in. How did you do it??? thanks. Pat

[limers]

Zen Im so happy for you .One year ,I long to be able to say that .I believe your right about the boredom thing ,boredom is a big trigger for me.Im going to keep trying and take your advice about keeping busy as I can till the urge to drink subsides. Well done mate, you truly are an inspiration.

[Doggygirl]

Congratulations Zen on one year of sobriety. And thank you so much for sharing - stories like yours truly give me hope.

DG
Day 83 AF

[Hundi]

How did manage to do it Zen practically? (well done btw). I have tried and failed so often now that it is scary. I just want to moderate like I used to but can see the benefits of a sustained abs period.

Mouse

[maasai]

great zen, its soo wonderful and great to count a year sober, "SOBRIETY IS THE MOST IMPORTANT ASSET WE HAVE. NO MATTER HOW LONG IT IS SINCE OUR LAST DRINK, WE ARE ONLY ONE DRINK AWAY FROM A DRUNK"
all the best, and keep the fire burning.

[deepseagirl]

Hi,

I'd like to add my congratulations too! You are an inspiration!

I'm now 7 weeks AF, and as you said, I know that 1 drink would bring me undone, so I'm committed to never touching alcohol again.

I will post when I get to my 1 years anniversary so watch this space, lol

All the best,

Deepy