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01-01-2010, 12:26 PM
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Change In Focus
With the New Year upon us and just passing year 2 of sobriety, I realize that I have had a shift in focus. No longer do I daily fight the battle of not drinking......oh! yes....I do realize that the beast is always lurking......looking for weekness and an opportunity to renew his relationship with me!......But, with this awarness....I no longer find myself embroiled in the daily fight of just not drinking. Rather I find myself fully focused on realizing who I really am! For many years, I had no clue who I was...drinking had totally blurred who I was, to myself as well as others.
In 2010, I look forward to new opportunities for personal growth. I have been renewing old friendships, cementing current relationships and truly living in the now! I am so encouraged hearing stories of personal growth by other abbers here at mwo. I truly get excited and happy hearing about others who are truly "Living".....did any of us truly realize that our drinking lives were truly not Living? So...here's to Living...Truly Living and may 2010, bring us much joy and the deep sense that we are finally Living Life with Purpose! Thank you for letting me post my reflections today......I would love to hear what other long term abbers are musing about! HAPPY NEW YEAR! xxx Kate 
__________________
A Dream is a Wish Your Heart Makes~Cinderella AF 12/6/2007 
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01-01-2010, 12:42 PM
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Great Post Kate!!!!!
YES...to truely living....I am to just finding myself..I was lost a long time ago thanks to al..... I am looking forward to the future and all it will bring!!!! Happy New Year .......
__________________
 AF since May 31 2008.....Happy and Healthy
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01-01-2010, 01:00 PM
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great post kateh1, I am looking forward to finding myself and living live to its happiest and fullest,and to hopefully continue this great journey that at long last i have begun.heres to 2010.
__________________
 AF 13/01/2009  NF 29/12/2006 – Louisa May Alcott ................. Nothing changes if nothing changes If you could see yourself...could you see abuse
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01-01-2010, 01:04 PM
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Nice one Kate!
Isnt it amazing (and sad) how much we need to learn about ourselves when we get sober? I am entering a new phase of personal growth this year too. I have decided to return to counselling to helpy myself get through a few issues that have raised their heads recently. How lovely it is to feel I can deal with them now instead of just attempting to blot them out as I would have done in the past. Happy New Year everyone!
__________________
Living now and not just existing since 9th July 2008 Nicotine Free since 6th February 2009
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01-01-2010, 01:24 PM
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I'm right there with you guys. After 30+ years of alcohol use/abuse-I have a lot to learn about the real me. When you spend so much time under the influence we don't even realize who we are or what we're doing. I always had this feeling I had more than one personality. One that was so comfortable being the life of the party and uninhibited...and the other side that felt like that wasn't me.....I had responsibilities to myself and to others and then the guilt and remorse would take over. It is hard to explain really.
I have started seeing a counselor as well, and my first goal is to find my inner child. Apparently I forgot how to have fun and cut loose and relax without alcohol. I spend so much time being uptight and tense. I think this may take some time, after depending on the al for so long! A great time for reflection and renewal for sure! 
__________________
_______________ NF since June 1, 2008 AF since September 28, 2008 DrunkFree since June 1, 2008 _____________  In memory and honor of MDbiker aka Bear. God has a special place in Heaven for bikers you know. ________________ The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you. 
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01-01-2010, 03:09 PM
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Great thread idea Kate!
In past years, I was so miserable that I felt compelled to make overly dramatic and hence, unattainable New Years Resolutions. I am so grateful to be on a path where all I really want to see different in the next year is a stronger and deeper committment to the path of personal growth I am already on. Now THAT is some change I can hardly believe!!!!! Happy New Year, DG
__________________
Continuously sober since 5/22/08 Nicotine free since 2/26/07 If I can, you can!
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01-02-2010, 03:40 PM
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I'm rolling around how I can use the tools and mindsets that worked for becoming and staying sober for making positive changes in some neglected areas of my life. I did this; I think I can conquer anything..... (and I never knew....
).
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01-02-2010, 07:49 PM
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Hiya Kate, and Abblander's!
Well, i must say, i am absolutely SO excited, alive, and full of wonder at what i will create today, and throughout this new year! The possibilities really are endless, and as you say Kate, the real me was so blurred and blurry to me, and to other's (though i alway's knew my potential....what an idiot). But now, being sober, and getting to know myself again, and being best friend's with this person, there is so much to do and experience. Better get cracking! Have a safe and happy New year folk's, and all the very best to you all, and your families, on this amazing, beautiful, crazy, wild and free journey! Bravo!
__________________
Outlaw camel wrangler with a big heart, and even bigger balls. ;-)
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