cravings

[aquamarine]

Hi Everyone, I had a question for anyone out there who has abstained for a period of time.
Have you found that the daily cravings for alcohol go away over time, or at least decrease.
Once you got through say, a few months did it get easier and was it not so much on your mind all the time? Thanks, I would love to hear about some of your experiences with this.
Aquamarine

[Breez]

Hi Aqua~

I had been 3 mo AF and had a small slip. It wasn't a craving but rather a trigger. The intense cravings go away & every once in awhile I get a "hmm, a margarita sounds delicious" (I didn't drink them) but will see something on TV that makes me think that. But it passes. Now I just have to watch out for certain triggers that in the past I KNEW I would use as an excuse to drink (ie. my hubby's side of the family who annoy the hell out of me-bunch of phonies & stress). Like I know my son will be having a b-day party the end of April & I will have to host "THOSE" people. I can already hear that alcoholic voice inside saying that one drink will be ok (which I know is not). So it's not a craving per se. More of trying to deal with a situation. That's going to be a test of will power big time!

So to answer your question directly-yes-my cravings had subsided to the point where I no longer crave it unless I REALLY think about it.

That's just my 2 cents.

[katesm]

Hi Aqua,

I can honestly say, for perhaps the first month, alcohol was never very far from my mind. Cravings could be intense and my moods were up and down like a yo-yo.

Over the next few months, while the cravings were still there, they were less intense as I realised that I may just be getting on top of this. I still thought about drinking often, but used whatever means of distraction I could find. And it became easier and easier to coast through the craving.

After that, it wasn't really a case of 'craving', but a fleeting thought that would filter through my mind, and I would sense it with almost regret. The old "Wouldn't it be nice to have a drink?". This, by memory, was between the 4-6 month mark, so I had absolutely no intention of following through on the thought, but I was definitely aware it was there. And these thoughts were few and far between.

6-9 months was perhaps the easiest time. Very rarely thought about drinking, and if I did, it was actually a yucko thought. Thinking about the actual act of drinking was repugnant.

Between 9-10 months - whammo. I got hit with a sensory attack that bordered on grievous mental harm. It was THE worst time since those first shaky steps into sobriety. The weirdest part of that time was that I actually didn't want to drink, but I was almost talking myself into it. I was questioning everything about my life, about me, about the freaking universe!

Our friend Neil named it the '9 month hump'. And a hump it was! I posted on Gen Discussion and received fantastic support. I also went back on Campral. I did everything I could to make sure I didn't slide back into that awful mess. (I always mention this rotten time, because I was so unprepared for it, and I hope others will be able to counteract it should it happen to them.)

Coming out the other side has filled me with more resolve than I've ever had. I'm not saying I have this drinking thing conquered, but I have a far greater understanding of what works for me, and more importantly, what doesn't work for me. And I know my enemy well.

Well, after all that blather, I can tell you that while I was sitting here typing, I let the thought of having a drink sweep through my mind, and it literally turned my stomach. So, in answer to your question (finally!), yes, it gets much, much easier. But we can never let complacency enter the equation, and we need to keep faith in ourselves. We need to keep faith that we can strangle a craving, beat the hell out of a trigger, and murder a hump. (Truly, I'm not a violent person!)

Best, best wishes,

Kate.

[xtexan]

Hi Aquamarine:

Kate did a most excellent job of describing those phases, that I went through as well.

Something strange happened over the weekend. I was cleaning out some junk from underneath my cabinets, and I found a bottle I had stashed. I barely remember stowing it away from myself, a long time ago.

It is a bottle of 1998 Chardonney, thats been there for 5 years I think. I had stashed it deep to let it age. Had forgotten about it completely.

I set it up on the cabinet and looked at it. It must be pretty well aged by now.

Here is the strange thing. I felt no emotion at all looking at it. No desire to open it. Just a few months ago, it would have given me a flood of negative emotions. Now it is just a bottle of wine, and I don't want it. It is like a lot of stuff I have been throwing out lately. Seems like it belonged to another person, like someone who lived in this house before I did.

Anyway, I took it to work in a sack, and gave it to a co-worker that loves the stuff. I said that it was left there by someone else I think. No longer any use for it.

Tonight is upper body weights workout, and I need some workout supplements, and some good food.
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Hey Kate! I like that hump murder! I have committed second-degree "humpicide"! Maybe some of our friends will be ready, and commit pre-meditated, first-degree "humpicide". More power to you my friends.
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Be well.
Neil

[irishlady]

Hello Aqua, Yes I second all that Kate has just said, but with a few differences.. I have been AF for almost 6 months now..The first two weeks were relatively easy as I was all fired up about never drinking again, also I was taking kudzu and supps three times a day, yes, I had cravings, but I was able to ride them out....

For about 6 or 7 weeks after that I was having cravings every day so I substituted chocolate and cakes for alcohol, bad idea I know, but I thought if I can stop drinking then I can deal with the weight later and it did help with the craving for sugar...

After two months the cravings got less so I stopped taking kudzu but kept on with the other supps, it was mostly at work that they were strongest, you see I work on a checkout in a supermarket and I would say that about 1 in 4 customers buy alcohol, but we were into November and coming up to Christmas so it seemed to me the world and his wife were coming through my till with bottles of drink.... I used a lot of visualisation techniques at that time which were, on the whole successful..

A week before Christmas I had a few really big cravings so I went back onto kudzu straightaway... Went to my daughters for Christmas dinner and all I drank all day was 4 glasses of kudzu which worked....

After New Year I stopped the kudzu once more and have been okay so far, except for a few times when I have really been hit big time.. Each time it happened I would find myself daydreaming about trying to do moderation, imagining what that first glass of wine would taste like, it was so strong I only had to sniff the air and I could smell that fruity smell of blackcurrants tinged with alcohol...If the feeling had been as strong as that during the first few weeks I'm sure I would have cracked and started drinking again, but, like Kate I have come to far now to ever allow myself to go back into that hell hole that I had the good fortune to escape from...

Probably in 4, 5, or even 6 years time I will still get a call from the beast, and I imagine it will be quite a strong one, but by then I will be even stronger than I am now and I will listen to his roar but will happily ignore it....

If I do get a craving now though, the secret is not to get fixated on the thought of the first drink, but take it past that to the time when you are halfway down the second bottle, then one step further to waking up the next morning and all that entails, hangover, remorse, depression, that soon kills any craving stone dead for me....Sometimes now I can go a few days and not think of alcohol at all, even when I am on here talking about it I may feel just a little whisper as it tiptoes through, but I just ignore it and it goes away...

Well I hope that helped, and I wish you good fortune on your journey,

Love, Louise xxx

[katesm]

Wow Neil!

Humpicide? GREAT word.

And pre-meditated Humpicide? Excellent!

Funny about the bottle of wine. I was doing a massive (long overdue) clean out of my clothing about a month ago, and came across a bottle of Vodka stashed at the back of some shoe boxes. Like you Neil, I was almost dispassionate. Funnily, I felt no shame or anger, and definitely no desire. I took it out and gave it to my husband, with an ironic smile on my face. He took one look at the bottle, then my smile, and started laughing. (Trust me, he's found the odd bottle of stashed vodka over the years!) But what made him laugh, was seeing me completely unaffected and not even trying to get rid of it surreptitiously. He told me I looked free. He's seen how hard I've worked at this.

I haven't the heart to tell him just how hard I still work at being 'free', but it was a nice moment.

This is just soooo worth it.

[Ripley]

Really interesting and useful thanks, esp for beginners who need to know what to look out for...

K x

[Eliziby]

I'm not a beginner but an oldie that gave in when the going got too tough and was right back where I started and was there for several months before coming back. It's as hard if not harder the second time around to part with the love affair even when you know you can't keep going on like this. My advise is to fight those demons, bumps, humps, whatever you want to call them, with everything you have in you and don't quit frequent visits to this site as I did. Like me, you may have feelings of regret, remorse, failure and guilt not to mention thinking of how far I could be now had I toughed it out. God bless you, and hang in there.