How Things Change

[Mags]

It's amazing how much life changes when you are first sober. The first 30 days, 90 days, 120 days - after that you stop counting days - then it is months, etc. At the very first, it is struggle - great struggle and confusion. Then it is a feeling of cleanliness followed by peace, almost euphoria. That is in the first few months. And that sense of well being continues month after month into years upon years. That is really what we want to achieve. A lifetime of sobriety.

But along the way, changes do occur. Rapid ones at first, and then more subtle, slower ones later on the journey.

I don't have exact dates, but I know this is April so I know I am three years now sober. I am feeling the changes from the sober life from the drunken life so much more this year. Not bad changes at all. Just very noticable ones.

Like many other alcoholics, I suffer from some psychological disorders, in my case, depression and anxiety. That is one of the reasons I drank and I know that. But when I stopped drinking they did not go away. But I could not just booze them into la la land anymore like I used to. So, I have been working with my shrink to learn to deal with then in other ways,but let's face it, they don't always do it like a bottle. So I have had to learn to live with a lot of pain that I didn't expect to have to feel after going sober. I thought life would be a bed of roses.

I guess that all I am learning now is what the rest of the world - the sober world - has had to learn all along. That is how to deal with issues that are difficult without climbing into that bottle. But you know, it can be done. They do it. Most people do it. Now I am learning I can do it also.

I am still learning how to. It is new to me after so very many years of giving my problems over to the cloud of alcohol. But I can do it.

This is not over, but I have done it and will do it.

My best wishes to all,

Mags

[myra]

Mags

This is a really good post. Lots of insight. I agree, that we have to learn what the sober world knows, and that is how to face life on life's terms and not resort to alcohol. Simple but not easy. Guess I was around AA too long as I hear them coming out in my posts.

Your strength is a good thing for me to witness.

Myra

[Determinator]

thank you Mags. you are a real life heroine of mine. XXXX

[stollies1]

Great work Mags!
3 years AF,fantastic achievement...
Good luck with your ongoing challenges Mags,I'm sure you'll master these soon also
Love
Victoria xxooxx

[Chief]

Great post, Mags....

Congratulations on 3 years...that is fantastic. You are a great asset here...we all admire and love you...

Don

[Thankful]

Mags, congratulations on your 3 yrs! I hope I can follow you on your path. Those are some big shoes to fill.

I love your post. Those words are so true and really ring home for me. It was so easy to grab a beer when I got stressed. Only those stresses aren't nearly as bad as I built them up in my mind. Those "stresses" were just everyday life. And I chose to drink that everyday life away for way too many years and no matter what I do, I'll never get that time back. But reclaiming the future is such a motivation!!

Thank you for your post. I really needed that today.

Love, Me

[lorisunshine]

Mags,
first let me congratulate you on your wonderful achievement of being 'THREE YEARS SOBER'. WOW...WOW...WOW.
Like thankful said.........these are mighty big shoes to fill.
And last but not least, thank you for sharing your journey with us and for being our beacon in this endeavor.
Love ya Mags.
Lori

[meditation mama]

Mags.. that was wonderful. Thank you for sharing that with us. I especially like it when you said " So I have had to learn to live with a lot of pain that I didn't expect to have to feel after going sober". That for me is a crucial bit of advise. I think many of us are so used to not having any sort of pain that sitting through it is a new experience. And like you it wasn't pleasant. But, I have learned by very close observation that those periods of pain do indeed pass. So, the more I go through these periods the stronger I get and the more I am confident that, even though I am in the midst of pain, it is not permanent.

Thanks again, Mags. You are truly amazing.

Namste, my friend.

MM

[FloridaBoy]

for the post. and life is better without crawling into the bottle.

[Ripple]

Not counting days as much..all is moving on to better and better days. Am gratefull i started this journey last fall, now it is spring and the worst seems to be behind! My happy hour now is waking up clear minded early not going out dizzy late and waking the next day at noon..Clean works for me! Life is good!