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One Liners / Keep 'em goin... One Liners / Keep 'em goin...
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Old 06-28-2008, 01:40 AM
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Everybody repeat after me: "We are all individuals."

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Old 06-28-2008, 01:56 AM
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I'm not.
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Old 06-28-2008, 08:54 AM
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oh Tawny, you are quite the individual!
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Old 06-28-2008, 09:08 AM
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Heres a few one liners from Steven Wright (the master of one-liners!)

Drugs may lead to nowhere, but at least it's the scenic route.

My theory of evolution is that Darwin was adopted.

I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

Boycott shampoo! Demand the REAL poo!

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.

All those who believe in psychokinesis raise my hand.
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Old 06-28-2008, 11:08 AM
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I'm normal in MY world, not normal in others... so what? LOL

Love one liners - keep them coming.

No-One can make you feel inferior without your permission. - love that one and I have blatantly stolen in from another member.

Lx
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Rather die standing, than live on my knees, begging Please..... No More.......
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Old 06-28-2008, 03:52 PM
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We are born naked, wet and hungry. Then things get worse.
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Take everything in moderation. Including moderation.
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Old 06-28-2008, 03:55 PM
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I am, therefore, I am
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Courage does not only roar, Sometimes it is the small voice at the end of the day that says "I will try again tomorrow".
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Old 07-03-2008, 10:36 AM
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Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime?

If the 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?

If you tied buttered toast to the back of a cat and dropped it from a height, what would happen?

If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?

If nothing ever sticks to teflon, how do they make teflon stick to the pan?

If you're in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights?

Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?

Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?

How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings?
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Old 07-05-2008, 08:48 AM
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What do you call a man with a seagul on his head?
CLIFF

boom boom, "it's the way ae tell em!!!"
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Old 07-05-2008, 02:54 PM
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NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO, IT'S WRONG!?! HA! IAD.
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