Other important issues

The tiredness does last quite a few days. I start to feel like I HAVE to go to bed at around 7:30, and force myself to stay up another couple of hours. It's a very intense feeling-part of withdrawal, I think. At least for me, my body craves rest and the beautiful sleep of the non-drugged person! I really think the body just reels from all of the changes its going through. But it does pass! You just need to catch up on your rest and I think on your dreams, quite literally. You don't go into the REM or dream phase as much when you drink and when you stop, it goes into dream overdrive.

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mollysdream

It's interesting that you describe it in terms of physical cravings vs. mental cravings. I've been thinking about this distinction also.

I've found after a couple of weeks on Campral that the physical cravings are GONE. No sign of them whatsoever. It is wonderful not to have that feeling gnawing at me every day as I leave work, and the struggle over whether to stop and buy a bottle.

However, the mental cravings still pop up. As sick as it sounds, there's a part of me that misses the old routine. I guess that just goes to show that there is no "magic bullet" -- and that's where other aspects of the program come in. My brain chemistry is changing, but along with it, I have to change my thinking about alcohol. I have to change my mind.

Hang in there!

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Mikeupnorth

Been on Topa for two days now. I took 25mg at 5 pm and have my first drink at 7pm. It took me 1 hour to drink my first glass of champagne, I threw half of the second one out. Last night I had one glass. I'm taking half my supps (still waiting on half) and I'm doing my hypno cds at night. I really can't believe how quickly it worked. I usually drink up to 8 glasses a night and never have a night off so you can imagine I'm pretty elated. I'm not stopping myself from having a drink I'm just noticing I don't really want it when I pour it. Tastes different too.

Noticing a few side affects but nothing equals the joy of not drinking. I'm waiting on my kudzu from vitanetonline. They said it would take up to 14 working days to arrive from the US. Hate all the waiting but it's worth it.

If you can get your topa and at least some vitamin B, L-glutamine and milk thistle started you should notice a difference.

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Rails33

...Up the kudzu and L-Glut. I think you said you're awaiting topa? You'll need enhancement to keep those neurotransmitters in check. If you're using kudzu capsules, match the amount used in the clinical trials: 3,000 mg. daily in three equal doses. If you're using powder (such as that from the Happy Herbalist) use a level teaspoon or so divided in a couple of doses over the day. He provides tea bags, but you can also stir it into hot or boiling, then mix cooler water and just drink it. And sprinkle it on everything: salsa, soup, stews, etc. You'll be amazed at what a different kudzu makes. Really can't overdo kudzu; go here for more info.

If possible, modify your schedule a bit, this is important...

* For when you're home, identify which hours are *worst* for you, particularly with the stress and challenges of kid care taking. We all know how that can set us over the edge--particularly when our spouses are gone. Can you plan some special outings (to movies you'll all enjoy) those nights your husband is out; then dinner at a place that doesn't serve drinks, so you won't be tempted. Avoid Chucky Cheese at all cost.

* Call on a friend or babysitter on at least one of those nights so you can go out for a treat: pedicure, shopping, volunteer activity, etc. or if earlier in the day (several hours before you go to bed so it doesn't keep you up) go to the gym. Then home for a hot soak, tuck the kiddos in, and straight to bed for you with hypno.

* Fill your fridge with all kinds of substitute beverages. Try new herbal teas. Buy a new tea mug and in your hypno make it your recovery mug. Incorporate it into you visual cues...every time you see it, touch it, use it, you become stronger, the craving subsides, and this reinforces all you've accomplished.

* Consider non-alcoholic drinks (tricky for some). One beer drinker I know "cheats" with non-alco Coors or St. Pauly Girl. Or perhaps a non alcoholic wine. Others tell me this actually frustrates them, so you'll have to see if this works for you. But the *act* of drinking a fake beverage in a wine glass or out of a "beer bottle" has been calming to others.

* Turn on the tube and find a good movie...then indulge in something to keep your hands busy (popcorn, nuts that must be shelled, etc.) along with a healthy beverage.

* Come on the board when you feel the craving is getting the better of you, and read what you posted earlier about how great you feel. The craving will pass and you'll feel like a million bucks in the morning. Once you've incorporated the entire program, it will not be this hard, although you're absolutely right: we must remain vigilant.

* Find that book you've been dying to read and get started. (Can't remember who's read what, but yes, Caroline Knapp's "Drinking, A Love Story" is brilliant. Totally unrelated, but fascinating book I just finished: "Blink: The Power of Thinking Without Thinking by Malcolm Gladwell")

* And speaking of the internet, once you have the kids to bed, if you're up and still craving, start surfing until you get lost. Look around on Ebay for some eclectic gift for a friend--buy it for her early this year. Do a little genealogy research. Do a vanity search, that's fun (look up your name or photo under Google Images.) Whatever...get lost on line for a couple of hours while you drink water, tea or whatever. Surfing can be such a time sink and it can help you get past the "craving hours" if they're late at night. (On the other hand, if your association with surfing is tied too strongly to drinking, this may be ineffective.)

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MWOJewell

…Thank goodness about 18mos ago, I went to the Dr for extreme fatigue, she didn't know what was going on, after doing all the blood wk, ask me if I was depressed, I said "no", as I didn't feel like it. She put me on effexor and I started getting my energy back and feeling like I should be. In the meantime I ran across a book "Healing Anxiety & Depression" by Daniel G. Amen, M.D. What I think I had was anxiety with a little depression and effexor @ 75mg works great for me. I highly recommend reading it, if you are an "A" type personalty or depressed.

I do put mineral water in a wine glass now, of course w/ice cubes, as I am so use to carrying it around w/me, so that helps. The B vitamins should help some on the anxiety, just start researching, that is what I have had to do these last fews yrs, as the Drs just don't have all the answers, anyway the ones I want to hear!!

Follow up post

[Taking Effexor] was a concern for me when I had to start taking Topamax on my own, so I started my own research on taking both at the same time. I do think the Dr's put us on too high of a dose tho, when a smaller one will work just as well. I am very pleased taking both. It has been a long time, since I have felt this good!! If your bloodwork and everything else checks out fine, try effexor. Did he give you topamax? I know the feeling of dragging home and can't get up hardly to make dinner, that went on for a good 4 or 5 yrs, for me. but Dr Amen's book was an eye opener for me, as I did not want to take drugs for depression or anxiety, but now I am sanging a different tune about that. Then I knew Roberta's book was another eye opener for me and God sent! I can not stress enough to people, don't give up and feel crappy, just because the Drs don't have the answers, search, search, search.

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Nans

…my only answer to you is to keep remembering why you came here in the first place. I think that's the most important piece of advice I can give you. Just focus on your original reason for coming here.

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clopatch1

I like you was getting dscouraged I was taking the Topa,
I was listening to the CD's taking the powder the rest of the supps etc. etc. and still drinking the same amount.
Then, one day, about 3 and a half weeks in, I woke up
and didn't feel like drinking anymore. That was 4 weeks ago. Not the slightest urge. if I were not actually experiencing it, I would not believe it. I am now up to 200 mgs of topa a day. I am experiencing more then moderate cognitive side effects. My wife, a physician, who uses topamax in her practice, but for different reasons, advises me that since this dose is working for me, to stay at thiis dose for the remaing 5 weeks of the program and then taper down.
I concider the side effect a very small price to pay for regaining control of my life.

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sailor111

A Million Little Pieces by James Frey is a gripping account of his six weeks in a treatment center. Has anyone read it? I think we could have some good discussions around it (it's currently Oprah's Book Club selection). The author is told that AA is his "only hope", but he comes up with his own ideas. Rigpaseeker will be pleased to know that the Tao Te Ching helped James' recovery far more than the 12 Steps. If anyone is looking for a compelling, can't-put-it-down book, this is a winner.

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carmen840

Wow..that's amazing. I am so happy for you! One of the things that I picked up from rehab and AA, too, was the isolation issue and how important it is to connect with people who are like us. I will never forget that, and I always know that's a warning sign when I don't want to be around anyone. I think I am going to go to at least one AA meeting a week now just for that reason. I figure if in rehab they tell you to go to one everyday initially, then I can go to one a week just to gain that connection and not have that isolation.

I keep writing this (maybe in vain) but I figure if at least one person reads it it may help. If you are a woman, and you think you may want to go to a support group like AA but don't know if you are "like them", just go and sit through one BUT FIND AN ALL WOMENS MEETING. That is extremely important. Otherwise, you might stumble into a meeting where you just don't feel you fit in and never give it a second chance. Again, I keep saying this, too...I don't know if I "buy in" to the whole AA philosophy or not..but nevertheless...what does it hurt to go and get support with a group of caring people who have the same issues and problems that you do? Like this board?

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jenram

Moderation is the one part of RJ's program that I am a bit sceptical about. I imagine it's like a heroin addict deciding that they are going to have "just a little bit of the drug" from time to time. Perhaps some of you might be able to manage alcohol moderation but I think you would need to stay on topa for the rest of your lives to make sure our mischevious brain circuitry is forever kept in check. For me moderation is not my choice. However, that's only my opinion.

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Misha io