Day 24

Aloha Surfers!

Day 24! Only six more! at

Beautiful work everyone! Keep on keepin on!!!

Gabby, you deserve a big HUG :d for all the crap you had to deal with yesterday. I'm glad that you're all ok and very heartened that you didn't buckle under the pressure. Just like you said, it would have been much worse if you were woken up from a beer sleep and had to deal through that haze and headache. I don't even think we realize how quickly we become strong after leaving the booze behind. Presto! Mushy Mom to Strong Mom in just 17 days ... it's amazing! Now, what are you going to do about the stress? I mean as for relieving some of it... I think you should go and get yourself an hour massage, or take a yoga class... something to help release that load! Or go all out & have a Kanga Day! ol

Yes i totally agree Donna! As you so eloquently said, forgiveness of self is fully tied in to self love. Two sides of the same coin - can't have one without the other right? That may be especially true for us, because we're so used to blaming ourselves for our illness that it becomes like a catch 22. Two sides of the coin as we are both the victim and the perpetrator of the crime simultaneously. Just think of the way we talk to ourselves the morning after. i.e. "Why am I doing this to myself!" So it's like we finally decide not to be a victim anymore, and at the same time to stop victimizing...ourselves. Then we have to forgive the victimizer, and love the victim, both within.

That hits the core of the whole "problem" in problem drinking for me. While I'm battling myself everyday over drinking, I'm thinking from the abusers AND the abusee's points of view. which means I have no integrity in my mind or body, no wholeness. And then my soul is just confused by the chaotic, crazy inner scenario! So the wholeness that I now allow myself to have, or to be, is just my natural state, the way it should be without the divisive intrusion of that beast!!!

On a side note, lately I've been suspicious of normal drinkers, especially people who just want A whiskey. I'm like, what are you kidding me? How do you not want 4 more! ol I think they're all sneaking on the side thinking they're slick. And the ones who really are happy with just one, well who's to say that's normal? I say they're a pack of weirdos!! Maybe there's something wrong with their brains! :rollin


Nancy, I am just beginning to realize that - "we are Spirit having a human experience" ! I love that! Wow, I couldn't put it into words but that is a perfect way to describe it! Keep lapping up those yummy grandkids. I love spending time with my grandparents so much! My grandmother is 94! She is the bomb!! Love you too!!

Love you all!!

Kisses,
Deirdre

Be not ashamed of mistakes and thus make them crimes.
Confucius

:d :P HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEIRDRE!!! :P :d

43 years young today right! Have an absolutely wonderful day!!

Good morning all,

Very happy birthday wishes to you Deidre.!!!! Do something really special today. You deserve it.

Gabby,I'm sorry about the trouble you went through with your son. Sometimes really good kids get caught doing stupid things.Many times they learn from these mistakes.I'm up every night waiting for my oldest son to come home.It's a good thing I'm sober so I can tell if he's not. They are so good at hiding things.He's off to school in Sep and I should have some serious bags under my eyes by then.

Will check in later but have an early appt. Good day all.
Janet

Good Morning, Everyone! Glad to hear Gabby's ok...my 15 yr old was at a rock concert last night but I stayed tough...we even unplugged the cable so she couldn't sneak back on the internet after we'd gone to sleep...she is in that phase of staying up till all hours and then i don't see her until 2 pm the next day...she has tons of stuff to do but has this control thing that she can't do it if i ask her to; has to be her idea...'she's a rebel' is her favourite song
Reeely wanted that wine last night but had juice and then coffee and got over it by about 9 or 10...then i wasn't about to give in when hubby had a nightcap!!! so am truly P Radiant this AM!
PR is a fine nickname for me = thanks for it!
Going out to bbq tonight but i'll just be the designated driver and stay tough...i really want to win this one! Not ready to love myself, but that will come i hope?
Have a great Saturday
PR

Hi all, happy Saturday!!! Sorry I haven't been here the past week, but the long days of summer keep me outside; just can't sit inside while it's still light! Summer solstice is my FAVORITE time of year!!

PLUS I had to fly out of town for work--and since I do NOT like flying (can get panic attacks at the slightest turbulence) boy was I drooling--uh, watching other passengers ordering drinks. BUT I did not, even on the way home. Then I visited with my dad for a few days and had no access to computer. I hope everyone is well--I do know that for myself I cannot "count down" remaining days of the month because I'm afraid of my head telling me I did it and can award myself with a drink now. . . . so I'll just try to keep it on a "today" basis.

Pats on the back to everyone, and hugs.
Ter

'Morning y'all,

Day 19. 18 down and feeling fine! Kids are happy to have mom back. Hubbie too! As a matter of fact, he's asked me for a date tonight! This'll be our first n/a date in forever... I wonder what "stainers" do on a date? LOL One daughter told me recently that she can't believe the difference in me "this time". Said that she and her siblings always noticed when I tried to stop drinking in the past... Even though I tried to keep it on the "downlow"... Said that I was near impossible to live with. But this time... She said is sooo different! She sees how relatively calm and happy I am during this process. She sees me eating healthy and excercising. And even though she thinks the cd's are "out there", she's ok with 'em 'cuz Mom is getting "better"! How's that for a progress report? GOTTA love RJ for publishing her research and personal triumph over alcohol with MWO! What a life changer!!!

Well well... and a Happy Happy B-day to ya, Deirdre! It's Deirdre's day to wear the paper tiarra! Oh look... It's all sparkley and shiney with various hues of glitter glue! Love the pink flamingo sticker smack in the front too! Veeeeeeery fetching... Ok... Now twirl so we can all see... Simply FAAAAAAAB DAAAHLINK!

PR- Waaay proud of ya, girl! DD tonight? WOW! Good for you! I can't remember EVER being DD... OK Wait... ONCE. Maaany moons ago. Maybe one day I can graduate to the elete status of DD too... ??? Hope springs eternal!

Hang tough, Gabby. We're here for ya.

HAPPY NOT HUNGOVER SATURDAY Y'ALL!

Good for you PR! Sounds like you are settling right in to the whole abs frame mind. It does get easier with each passing day! Those teenagers...they are a blessing, just keep that in mind. Hey, we have our computer set so that the internet for the children's computer automatically turns off at 11:00 pm, much to their dismay, but it gives my husband and I well needed piece of mind knowing that every night it just goes off!

Susan, I hope you are doing ok! You have been such a great support to all of us here when we have needed it. I hope you let us return the favor! Let us know how it is going if you can!! :d

Ter, glad to have ya back! Way to get through those flights. I HATE flying too, so I hear ya on that one!!

Jane, that first n/a date was different, but mighty fun if I remember correctly...oh, and of course I remember the WHOLE thing! ol

So Deirdre, they are all a pack of WEIRDOS are they? Too funny!! I am not sure my husband would agree. It would too funny if he chose today to pop in here for a visit and read what you wrote, and then to see me not at all disagreeing!! ol

I have much to share about yesterday, (all good by the way) but need to get my husband and son off to sailing.

Hope everyones Saturday is getting off to a GREAT start!!

Donna

ahh dang, I just wrote this nice reply and i lost it. now I gotta leave for work. whaaa.....
anyway.....alll is well and I'll re-write at the end of the day.

Deirdre, Huge Happy Birthday to you! Hope you had lots of fun.
Ohhh, thanks for the hug. Yesterday it would have made me cry. Today it feels good. Yes a Kanga day sounds good. Kanga...TAKE ME AWWWAAAYYYY.....
My treat for the day was a sale at Victorias Secret. X-hubby bought...(shhhhh...he doesnt know)
Anyway Janet, PR, Jane, Donna and Ter Thanks for your kind words and support. Felt nice when I needed it.
Ter, I know what cha mean on the flying. I get anxious too. I'm so busy worrying about the plane, pilot, noises, clouds, who's on the plane, who's at the airport, and so on and so on, that I do stupid stuff like forget to remove my manicure set from my purse.....so I pratically get strip searched. And forget to bring my id....so I pratically get strip searched. All the while my family is waiting on me. Now they basically wont travel with me and tell me that I have been put on the "No Fly List" whatever that is! Anyway....I know what cha mean. I would always try to fly anytime after noon so I could drink the second they offered and would order 2 to make sure to get it in. Actually I prefer to drive. Even to Canada.
Well getting to long again. You can see why I named myself what I did. bye all for now. gab

Happy Birthday Deidre!
So I've been participating in the mods board the last couple days cuz I still wanted to check in. I had a bad couple days last week and a little wine left over. So I figured for the weekend I would work on the shed I'm building with my hubby in the back yard and then have One and only One glass of wine at night. So far Friday and Saturday went as planned.

I'm not sure how I'll even get out of bed tomorrow because I'm already getting sore sitting in a char for a few minutes typing a message. Shed's half done though, we made a lot of progress today even with the mad downpours this afternoon. We had a 2 hour rain delay in building today.

Hey I miss you guys and I will be back and ready to go with abs soon.

Love you all,
Marcie