rubywillow

[Popeye]

Hi Rubywillow....
I really hope that you can find what you need to have some happiness.
I drank because I love it.
I love the buzz; the tension just seems to melt away with the first gulp. ( I was going to say 'sip' but who am I kidding) The problem is I don't know when to stop. I'll drink until I pass out or run out. How many times have I woken with busted knuckles and reproachful looks from people I care about and not known why.
Since finding this place, I have become a different person. The program and the wonderful people here have helped me immensely. I am not where I want to be drink-wise, but I'm a million miles from the loser I was.
Again, I hope you find what you need.
Best wishes.

[Prest4time]

Welcome Ruby!

Just wanted to offer a few thoughts as I travel with my husband often too on business and understand your plight. Florida has lots of history... not sure where you will be, but maybe you could "google" ahead of time and find some places of interest to visit and keep your mind occupied? Its a lot of fun... I've gone on some fun ventures! Also, think about a special journal for your trip. Just a little notebook, or a file in Microsoft Word if you have a computer. Do a lot of soul searching while away... it can be a good thing!

Best of luck to you!
P4T

[edwin]

i wish you all the best off look..just keep up the good work you be fine..you will get all the help here you need

[rubywillow]

I'm back, guys, and it was great! MOD RULES! I was in control- no drinks, 1, up to 3 and I SLAMMED the door. I learned stuff, since I was all there, watched other drink and act stupid, enjoyed my husband on our 38th anniversary, ate seafood, spent the best quality time with my sister (who joined us for a free vac. and helped me since I have mobility problems). We haven't spent that much time together in 25 years, and we talked about everything. I learned my brother, who has been very judgmental of me for years, is a problem drinker - i.e., can't stop after one. He's too proud to admit he has a problem, and unlike how he has been to me, I won't judge him because of it. I just hope he asks me how I changed, and I'll send him here.
Thanks for your support. Just knowing you were all here made all the difference. I know there will be tests ahead, but I have 1 success under my belt, and I can face the future.
CJ

[Cinders]

RubyWillow,

Back and so glad you had a wonderful time on your trip. You were so dreading it and it worked out great!!

Keep up the good work.

Are you going to try to stay mod or are you shooting for AF?

There are people here doing both.

Again, glad to see you,
Cindi

[rubywillow]

Cindi, Mod's working great now, but I believe AF could be in my future. I've seen such a bizarre difference in the overdrinkers, the mods, and the af's this last week, since a lot of the salespeople I met were quite pickled when my husband introduced me to them. He tried to steer clear of most of them but if they saw him and zeroed in he had no choice. I told him it was better for me to see what I used to look like. Also, my sister drank quite a bit while she was with me, and she didn't realize she got loud. I noticed she got some looks, and it's awful, but I was so glad I wasn't getting them. I have lot's of work to do - the battle's not won yet. I'll let you all know when I face each one, since you are my sounding board now.
CJ

[Gyco]

good thread again r w,i like you am feeling,the effects of many years of drinkin keep comin here and the advice is great nc to have you here gyco

[kriger]

Ruby,
You sound so upbeat and hopeful! Great lessons can be learned by just watching people as they drink (while remaining sober yourself); It is quite eye-opening, isn't it. Then when the soul searching starts and you see your former self in those people, it really hits home. I'm so happy you had fun in Florida; what part were you in? I lived most of my life there before moving to the west. Good luck on your journey to either mod or go AF. My path is AF because I have no ability to control when I start drinking. I can do it for a matter of months or even years but I always come back to "real trouble" with alcohol. Have a great evening! Kriger

[Carmac]

Ruby -

I have been following your posts and so pleaed to see you are doing well. It is amazing how when we step back and take stock, we observe so much that may have passed by us before. Breaking the cycle is hard but you seem to have made some wonderful steps in that direction.

Keep posting and best wishes as you continue along your path.

Erin