So I FREAKING slipped!! I HATE my AA group here. The only GOOD news is I only had 4 beers and stopped at that, I've NEVER been able to do that before, I would ususally drink evrything I had and go out for more. I had 4 beers and talked to a WONDERFUL friend on here last night and we realized I need to find another group. I 'm so sick of the clique in my group. They all know eachother and have seen me everyday for the past week but not ONE of them talk to me. They are so full of B.S. saying they love to see newcomers and they love that we come back....yadda...yadda....yaddda they make it a point to talk to us (bulllshit) excuse my language but it's true. The men walk up and talk to you but they stare at your damn chest the whole time and aren't even talking to you. Since they also all know eachother they call on the same freaking people to talk day after day and I'm SOOO tired of listening to the same old stuff that has NOTHING to do with AA!!!! It's like a freaking social hour for them and I'm there to get better, not to listen to them ramble on about Joan, or Jim and their cat or their dog is still pooping on the carpet...OMG and they all laugh because they all KNOW eachother and I have NO idea what the hell they are talking about!! Not to mention that my ex-sponsor that I "broke it off" with fiance was there and that SOB looked right at me and if looks could kill, ya'll I'd be dead. They are a bunch of hypocrites and I 'm fed up. BUT, I listened to this woman talk, could relate, she RAISED her hand at the beginning to show she was willing to sponsor so I approached her at the end of the meeting. Well, once again, I could tell she was being bothered she very short and wrote down a list of what she wants me to write down today and I'm suppose to meet with her at 3, and I'm going to do it but I just don't know anymore!!!
You know I went to AA to get BETTER not to feel like a FREAKING outcast in society, like I've felt all my life. I think I'm going to meet with this woman try another group and if that doesn't work I need to find another avenue, the one thing I DO know, is I will NOT be going back to that group! Anyway, I thank ALL my friends on here for being so loving and supportive I'm sorry I let you down, but you know what it could have been ALOT worse, I usually would have drank until my husband had to carry me to bed, but I didn't and by the way, I feel like CRAP this morning, a hangover after 4 beers...LOL that has NEVER happened. I guess it goes to show something has changed, I don't know what but something.
Anyway I love ya'll, without you guys, I don't know what I'd do! Well off to go grocery shopping with a hangover and an irritable toddler and a pissy husband....FUN!!!! :-)
You know I went to AA to get BETTER not to feel like a FREAKING outcast in society, like I've felt all my life. I think I'm going to meet with this woman try another group and if that doesn't work I need to find another avenue, the one thing I DO know, is I will NOT be going back to that group! Anyway, I thank ALL my friends on here for being so loving and supportive I'm sorry I let you down, but you know what it could have been ALOT worse, I usually would have drank until my husband had to carry me to bed, but I didn't and by the way, I feel like CRAP this morning, a hangover after 4 beers...LOL that has NEVER happened. I guess it goes to show something has changed, I don't know what but something.
Anyway I love ya'll, without you guys, I don't know what I'd do! Well off to go grocery shopping with a hangover and an irritable toddler and a pissy husband....FUN!!!! :-)
c: :heart:
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