Sunday, July 16

[Guest]

G'day Absville!

Hope you all are enjoying your wonderful abs weekend.

I have to get up really early tomorrow and head out to Fire Island for a day trip. So I'm leaving you all with just a quick hello. Hope to catch up soon. I have read all the posts but just couldn't find the time to write out my thoughts yet... it's like that sometimes as you all know. I'm still thinking about all of our issues though, and hopefully finishing "Drinking...A love Story" at the beach. Unless someone wants to play chess with me, then it will have to wait... hey, gotta have priorities right?

One Love,
Deirdre
:h
:**
Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water.

W. C. Fields

:lol

[Guest]

Sunday, July 16

July 16

Hi Deidre,
Sorry, I started another thread reading Sunday July 16.
I did not see yours was already up. Is there a way to roll everything into one day. Somehow I cannot edit.
Lori

[Guest]

Sunday, July 16

Sunday, July 16

Deidre, I am transfering my original post into your tread.
Lori
Dear Absville,
How is everyone this morning. Well I made it through another really busy, stressful day. Had Perrier and the anticipation of another hangover-free morning for stress relieve the night before. My cravings are getting more managable by the day. However, the triggers are manyfold and so much of it is habitual, like coming in the door - hanging up the car keys - dumping my purse into a chair and heading for the crystal, then heading for the fridge to get the ice and then heading for the liquor cabinet. Over and over again for years. My feet could probably have found the way with me sound asleep. I did not break the routine, but fill up with perrier on the rocks. So far, so good. I really need all of you on a daily basis - hope I am not getting addicted to you guys - but that would not be such a bad thing, as you are such a wonderful community.
Have to work today, so I must run.
Have a wonderful weekend in Absville.
Love Lori

[Guest]

Sunday, July 16

Hi Everybody, Today is huge for me. Big Day 40!
So I am thankful for that. Its been a hard week for me and I know I keep saying this but without the topa I WOULD NOT BE EVEN CLOSE TO THIS FAR. So dark circles, topa dopa and all, I MUST stay on it. And I am so glad that beer is my only temptation.
I think my deal last week was part Aunt Damm Flo for starters and just the whole gettin past the 30 days thing.
As good as I feel I am in touch with my feelings this has been hard to pin point. But I'll try.
From not drinking this long--going years with out missing but only few days here and there. And drinking on an average of 4-8....maybe 10 beers toward the end there a day. Wondering back and forth....do i have a drinking problem.....or dont I.....do I....dont I.and so on. The fact that I actually wouldnt really get drunk and do anything weird, slurr or stagger or act bad always make me have a false sense of no....your ok still. But now that I have gone without for these almost 5 weeks I absoultly do see that I have dependance on beer both for enjoyment, taste and relaxlation but ALSO....that dull numbing effect on my depressed feelings about many things. Mainly my not that great marriage but also other things stemming from childhood, that of course lead me right in to that not so great marriage. Now that I am without alcohol. I realize how much I miss it. And how much it was my biggest buddy. So I am sorta greiving in a sense the loss of my friend.Thats gotta sound so lame. How could I let alcohol be my friend like that. Like its is a human being. I dont know. Maybe cuz it was the most trustworthy? Thats pretty depressing in itself. Why have I picked untrustworthy humans to be in my life. This.....I need to work on. I realize I am in charge of the picking and can step it up! Ya think? I am in charge of this. As I am in charge of so much more and I have put that very important thing in ohter peoples hands. Pretty stupid and easy to fix. And then to put a bottle of beer in charge....really gettin stupid then.
So kinda feelin mad at me for goin this far. Yet feelin so scared still because I miss it. And dont feel in charge when I think its the topa killin my desire....yet still knowing I have the need. Without the topa I know i cant be trusted.
I feel happy because I have come so far not only just figurin out that I DO need help and stop having that false sense of
strength and stupid pride that I dont need help.
I just lost my whole train of thought....one of the kids.

I will have to come back. The big thing is I STILL HAVENT DRANK FOR 40 DAYS AND NIGHTS ( THANKYOU GOD , NOAH AND MOSES) ((AND TOPA AND YOU GUYS)) (((OOPS AND ME))) SO i CAN THINK ABOUT IT WITH ONLY A TOPA FUZZ INSTEAD OF ALCOHOL BUZZ.
gotta go.....
I will come back and pick up where I left off. gabby

[Guest]

Sunday, July 16

CONGRATULATIONS GABBY!!!

40 days in Absville! You go girl! Thanks for the inspiration.

Shaz, how goes day 2? Where are you that it's too cold to excercise? Welcome to the club and make yourself at home.

Dierdre, enjoy the beach!

Matt (freedom day 26)

[Guest]

Sunday, July 16

Hey stainers,

Congrats to all of us for 16 July days... or how ever many days, hours or minutes...

It's the big 4 - 0 out of 41 days here... sidding up next to our own sweet Gabby now. Here girl, you can have the paper tiarra today. My oldest daughter gave me a brand new tiarra this morning... It's silver plastic with a purple "40" right smack in the center! lol... Is that cute or what? And yes damn it... I earned it and I'm wearing it!

Deirdre, I keep hearing about that book. Is it a good read? I'm interested to hear your opinion.

Lori, good job on choosing the perrier! It takes a lotta guts to consciously change like that... It does get easier the more ya do it too...

Gabs, I understand grieving our old "friend" beer. Butcha know what I figured out during this past 41 days? It's actually NOT my friend at all. Yeah, it's dependable... but the only GOOD thing it offers me is the buzz(which I DO miss). Everything else about it sucks. It's a theif... a wolf in sheeps clothing... a liar... a leach ready to suck the very life right outta me. Thanks but no thanks. I already made too much progress to go back to having a dysfunctional relationship with it now. It will always be dependable in as much as it will always be there waiting for me... And IF I choose to take it back, it will be more than happy to steal my willpower, sanity, health, relationships, money, priorities, etc... Some friend huh? P U L E E Z E!!! I kinda envy those who can moderate... They can get a little glow on and walk away. I'm just not one of them. I said all that to say this... G'head and grieve the loss of your "friend", Gabby. Just remember, it's already proven to be one of those "untrustworthy" friends you referred to. So maybe it's not such a bad loss after all? Ok, sermon over... lol... Hey, it IS Sunday...

Matt, soooo glad to see you hanging with us! You sound great!

HAPPY NOT HUNGOVER SUNDAY Y'ALL!

[Guest]

Sunday, July 16

New: Fly into July

Okay.....being that I just took my supps with a glass of chardonney, I can understand anyone's frustartion of me even being on this thread....

However, I want to join you guys. You should all be really proud of what you've accomplished so far!!

Right now I am just starting out. Waiting on topa. But, obviously, still not beating the desire to drink...

Is it easy for you being AF? Is life as "fun"? or maybe I should say enjoyable? What are you experiencing physically? Emotionally?

I know I'll have some anxiety. Boredom.

LOVE the prior posts. One that I could relate to as alcohol being MY FRIEND. The other side of the situation being very well expressed; ALCOHOL IS THE WOLF IN SHEEPS CLOTHING.

Hope to join you soon! Sorry if I've done wrong by posting here and not beings abs. Heard a long time ago that you should hang out with people you aspire to be. Osmosis

XOXO

[Guest]

Sunday, July 16

Hi Living in La,
Nope, you didnt do anything wrong by posting here on abs. Welcome! I'm glad you have your supps.
So you ask if its easy being AF? Weeellllll.........sure, its a sinch. giggle, giggle.
Seriously, I would say I started my "relationship" lets say with alcohol way back in oh the mid "70's". Geeze thats 30 years. No wonder Mr Wolfie dressed in sheep fur is tappin on my shoulder Jane! :eek Dont know what my X is complainin about...Wolfie's got 5 years on him. ANYWAY, No this is not easy. I would not have my 40 days without Topa, MWO,these guys here and a lot of determination. And still its hard.
Anyway I love all these guys here. It really feels like a family with lots of support.
Glad you dropped in. Feel free to hang out. Gabby

[Guest]

Sunday, July 16

LA

Hi Living in LA,

It's really not possible for me to describe 26 days without alcohol after 20 years of heavy drinking. It is challenging, but most good goals are. The overwhelming experience has been one of feelings of freedom, self-forgiveness and believe it or not a calmness. The hardest part by far is that first step and the letting go of that little selfish devil that is inside of all of us. After that each day has gotten truly better and better - no lie.

I started my abstinence with the intention of simply doing a 30 day detox / "can I do it?" thing and leaving the future open to moderate drinking. I still haven't worked through everything yet but what I'm feeling is that I don't think I ever want to drink alcohol again and that feeling gets stronger each passing day.

This transformation is truly a miracle. I feel like my second chance and the second half of my life is right there for the taking.

Finish off that bottle of chardonnay and join us in Absville for a while. You've got nothing to lose and a whole new world to gain.

Matt

[Guest]

Sunday, July 16

Hi Guys,
Just checking in! Doing OK, went to see my doctor today. One of my biggest problems is lack of support at home. I am not going to make any drastic decisions yet but am going to build on my emotional healing and then decide what to do. It just means I have to extra vigilant with my thoughts as there is abit of emotional game playing here! Gabby I do understand what you are going through as far as greiving goes, we just have to replace it with something more worthwhile. Jane you deserve that purple tiara, were it with pride. Lori, Matt you all sound so good. Gotta get back there too.
Talk to you all tomorrow
Shas

[Guest]

Sunday, July 16

Hey Abbers!!!!
First, I am SO excited! Today is Day 30!!! I did it - 30 and counting.......
Gabby and Jane - congrats on 40! I get to follow in your wake, thanks for leading on...
Gabby - I so relate to your friend, beer. My friend was brandy, and dependable she was. She was dependable for getting a buzz, feeling relaxed, forgetting, not caring, hangovers, memory loss, fuzzy brain, etc.... definately a mixed bag, my friend brandy - but she was there anytime I wanted.
The good thing is that now I am learning to be friends with myself - more every day. Now that I am not so fuzzy, I can get to know me.
Shas - welcome - you can do it!
Living in LA - Of course you are welcome here! You can do this too. As far as my experience has gone so far - the start was pretty dang scary - I mean, what would I do without my friend brandy???? (see above) I have some sugar craving and trouble sleeping, both resolved. i stll have occasional urges - not really strong enough to call craving - the L-glut under the tongue trick works great for me - really! I also get a LOT out of the hypnosis cd's, I'm pretty religious with using them.
As far as enjoying life - oh, so much more!!!!!!! I am proud of me, I enjoy every day waking up not hung over and knowing I can do this. Everyime I resist an urge, I feel stronger. I still miss my friend some, but the tradeoffs are worth it many times over. I think it was Matt who talked about going through the grief, just like losing any friend.
This is the best thing I have done in a long, long time and MUCH better than drinking!

Peggy