Aflight attdt was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets.
As a man approached,she extended her hand for the ticket & he opened his trench coat & flashed her. Without missing a beat...she said, :"Sir, I need to see you ticket, not your stub."
A lady was picking thru the frozen turkeys at the store, but couldn't find one big enough for her family.
She asked a stock boy, "Do these get any bigger?" The stock boy replied, "No ma'am, they're dead."
The cop got out of his car & the kid who was stopped for speeding rolled down his window. "I've been waiting for you all day," the cop said.
The kid replied, "Yeah, I got here as fast I could."
When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket.
Acollege teacher reminds her class of tomorro's final exam.
"Now class, I wont tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury or illness, or a death in the family, but that's it.
A smart ass guy in the back of the room raised his hand and asked, "What would you say if tomorro I said I was suffering from complete & utter sexual exhaustion?
The entire class is reduced to laughter & snickering.
When silence is restored, the teacher smiles knowingly at the student, shakes her head & sweetly says, "Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other hand"
As a man approached,she extended her hand for the ticket & he opened his trench coat & flashed her. Without missing a beat...she said, :"Sir, I need to see you ticket, not your stub."
A lady was picking thru the frozen turkeys at the store, but couldn't find one big enough for her family.
She asked a stock boy, "Do these get any bigger?" The stock boy replied, "No ma'am, they're dead."
The cop got out of his car & the kid who was stopped for speeding rolled down his window. "I've been waiting for you all day," the cop said.
The kid replied, "Yeah, I got here as fast I could."
When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket.
Acollege teacher reminds her class of tomorro's final exam.
"Now class, I wont tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury or illness, or a death in the family, but that's it.
A smart ass guy in the back of the room raised his hand and asked, "What would you say if tomorro I said I was suffering from complete & utter sexual exhaustion?
The entire class is reduced to laughter & snickering.
When silence is restored, the teacher smiles knowingly at the student, shakes her head & sweetly says, "Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other hand"
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