What's the difference between a Harley and a Hoover?
THE POSITION OF THE "DIRT BAG"
Why is divorce so expensive?
Because it's worth it!
Why is air a lot like sex?
Because it's no big deal unless you're not gettin any!
What do attorneys use for birth control?
Their personalities.
What's the diff. between a boyfriend & a husband?
45 min.
What's the fastest way to a man's heart?
Through his chest with a sharp knife. (I think a 45 cal might be quicker)
Why do men want to marry virgins?
They can't stand criticism.
What's the diff. between a new husband & a new dog?
After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.
What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
The same thing that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.
What's the diff. between a porcupine and BMW?
A porcupine has the pricks on the outside.
Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex?
Mace will do that to you.
Why did OJ Simpson want to move to West Virginia?
Everyone has the same DNA.
Where does an Irish family go on vacation?
A different bar.
How do you get a sweet little 98 yr old lady to say the F- word?
Get another sweet little ol gal to yell "Bingo!"
Hope I didn't leave anyone out!! Ha!... Happy Friday everybody!...Hugs, Judie
THE POSITION OF THE "DIRT BAG"
Why is divorce so expensive?
Because it's worth it!
Why is air a lot like sex?
Because it's no big deal unless you're not gettin any!
What do attorneys use for birth control?
Their personalities.
What's the diff. between a boyfriend & a husband?
45 min.
What's the fastest way to a man's heart?
Through his chest with a sharp knife. (I think a 45 cal might be quicker)
Why do men want to marry virgins?
They can't stand criticism.
What's the diff. between a new husband & a new dog?
After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.
What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
The same thing that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.
What's the diff. between a porcupine and BMW?
A porcupine has the pricks on the outside.
Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex?
Mace will do that to you.
Why did OJ Simpson want to move to West Virginia?
Everyone has the same DNA.
Where does an Irish family go on vacation?
A different bar.
How do you get a sweet little 98 yr old lady to say the F- word?
Get another sweet little ol gal to yell "Bingo!"
Hope I didn't leave anyone out!! Ha!... Happy Friday everybody!...Hugs, Judie
:H 
zwink:
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