what is moderation?

[WayOut]

how do you objectively determine moderation? drinks per hour? pocket breathalyzer? I want to try moderation, but dont want to be able to play games with myself (for example 5 beers before midnight and 5 more before 1 am is only 5 beers a day )

Six beers over a couple of hours just barely buzzes me now, whereas the same rate would have made me sloppy drunk some years ago. So what is a level for me I can consider moderation?

Also, how many nites per week should be completely dry to be "moderate"??

any thoughts appreciated.

[tryingtomod]

what is moderation?

I can't answer on that one I think it is completely up to you. I was going to ask the same question because I had 2 beers tonight while watching the game and planned for 3 more Sat out on the town. Not here to judge, are you just looking for a buzz or to slow down or to quit. You can do any of these and the great people here will try to help as much as they can. They have helped me in the short time I have been here.

[Waves 2]

what is moderation?

Hi and welcome to both of you,

Everyone has to find their own way out. And yes, the 5 before midnight and 5 after idea is one of the ways we like to trick ourselves into mods success!!!

A good way to start might be to set yourself a target for the week that is achievable.

What is achievable is dependant upon your present consumption. Some people begin by cutting down the number of drinks per night gradually. Some decide that a complete break for 30 days cuts the pattern.

However, most read the book, take the supplements and begin to exercise too.

Health advice says - no more than 14 units per week for a woman and no more than 21 for a man.

My personal rules have changed as I have become more successful at mods. But even now i have slip-ups. If I have more than 3 drinks on any one night it becomes harder to stop if there is more available.

The important thing is to make a plan that suits you. ( This was one of mine earlier on in my journey- now it's AF on work days and up to 3 at weekend.)

eg. "No more than 3 drinks per night with 3 AF days per week."

and stick to it.

Easier said than done. But it is possible. But as I said at the beginning;
Make sure your plan is achievable for you.

Good luck on your way out.

[Heavenly]

what is moderation?

I wanted to moderate but couldn't so I went af and have managed that with success.
If you count one small glass of champagne on New Years Eve breaking af then so be it. I dont count it - and I feel I am af for nearly one year now. (I took kudzu - for the first time for 2 weeks before New Years Eve and a few days after and it worked for me...no cravings).

Mods is hard as I am a drinker that once tastes 'my drink' I am in for the full amount.
Can't stop till I empty the bottle/s...
Good Luck with finding your own level as it were...

[trixietrack]

what is moderation?

if you can have one beer or one drink and stop without stressing out about it, then you can moderate.
I think it is probably difficult to moderate after having had a heavy drinking habit for meany years, or if you come from a family of heavy drinkers or most your social activities involve alcohol.

[IAD]

what is moderation?

Moderation is sometimes not drinking at all........! IAD

[memarcie]

what is moderation?

I agree IAD.

[dexterhead]

what is moderation?

I saw a psychiatrist last year and he gave me an interesting perspective. He said that one of the worst things about being a drinker is that you rarely get a decent night's sleep, because even a small amount of alcohol causes you not to be able to have the REM sleep your body deserves. He said that you really should try to have some AF days each week. that way your body has more chance to recover.

[FinallyRN]

what is moderation?

I'm glad I read this thread..........
As I contemplate whether or not I can MOD, its interesting to read others opinions and experiences. I have to be AF half the week for no other reason than my job........( emergency medicine, I carry a pager for call-backs on my assigned nights) but that didn't stop me over doing it on my off nights. I'm trying to develop a plan much like Waves that I can follow and be happy with...............we'll see. My down fall has always been socializing...........if I having a great time with 2 glasses of wine, imagine how much fun 10 would be!!!!!!! I have been here since the end of November but really only working it since January and so far I'm pleased with what I managed to do........
Talk soon

[Elfin]

what is moderation?

Hi, I am just starting this program. I decided I could not survive, physically, emotionally, monetarily without stopping how I was drinking. Last Wednesday I had 1/2 beer the first day, then nothing. On Monday this week after going through a not too bad withdrawel, I was invited out with new people. ended up on the beach with beer. I had possibly a whole beer (hard to tell, they were being poured) I had them only fill my glass 1/3rd, twice. I said early I was the designated driver.

I was afraid that I would use that to start the vodka again, but it did not.

What I did do is smoke a little pot. I am not a pot smoker usually,(we are talking years between smoking). But a friend got me some, and I like a little in the evening now. I know it isn't perfection, but it is a hell a lot better than what I was doing just eight days ago.

Also, I am indulging in things that are 'fattening'. In the evening I am treating myself to hot rice milk with spices or half frozen mango. It is funny how false logic is used. I would be so good about my diet. Flawless, except then go all out for booze. I know mango is good for you, or hot milk, but in my crazy world, I had to shore up calories somewhere. Last night I had Waldorf salad with my dinner.... usually a no-no. I yummed it up. And no booze.

So, in keeping with this thread. I do believe in the ability to moderate. I also respect the ability of the mind to trick. I may be trading booze for two or three hits of pot, but that seems like a pretty good trade off. I have been sleeping well and get up early now. Let's see how this plays out...

Elfin

[Artsy]

what is moderation?

Hello Elfin

I'm almost done with my 30 day AF challenge and I made it without any problems. I have gained about 10 pounds within the 30 days because I’ve exchanged booze for food. I was thinking of smoking some pot but I could not find it and I thought it might make me eat more.

Did anyone start using other mind altering substances? I'm open to taking a valium from time to time although I've never taken one before.

I did go out shopping for fat clothes tonight. It seemed really strange to be buying such large sizes.

I hope I can stop eating soon as this is getting out of hand.

Artsy,

[gyco]

what is moderation?

well here it goes and i hope it helps,mod,1 moping around thinking about it,2 over whelmed by the thot of it,3persistently thinking about it, that is a receipee for alchoholism,or as some mite say alchoholics,which some dont like to here and last but not least cas,which stands for chronic alchohol syndrome,modding is when you can go thro a day and not think of it,which most of us do,or i do,modding is when you sit with your better half and dont see the terror in there face because they no you can becme a complete a s s hole after 5,my understanding is there is 24 hours in a day,and hopefully 8 or more we dont drink,so if my calculations are rt you have 16 hours to play with,divide by 2 ,is 8 ,hahahha 1 an hour,hope that helps,and if you start getting mummble mouth after a couple give yourself a brake and have fun have a great day gyco

[nancy]

what is moderation?

I think moderate as a woman is having minimum 3-4 days a week with no alcohol and a 3-drink cut-off on days you do drink, 2 drink cut-off is preferable.

I just re-read an interesting book that goes over all these issues: Responsible drinking, Moderation Management approach for problem drinkers, by Frederick Rotgers and Marc Kern.

I am really taking this seriously now. I aim to drink only in certain situations, like wine with a meal or if I want to meet someone for a drink. All drinking alone sessions are now canceled. All sessions of making myself feel better with booze are canceled. That's the main thing, not cutting down the amount, but changing your relationship with alcohol. Alcohol cannot be a coping mechanism anymore.

[Cinders]

what is moderation?

Nancy,

Your moderation plan sounds awesome!!

I hope you truly can change your relationship with alcohol and have a good and healthy one instead of a destructive one.

Keep us informed how it goes. I know many modders on this site would love to have that kind of relationship to drinking and your story may help them.

Love,
Cindi

[hippie37]

what is moderation?

Alcohol cannot be a coping mechanism anymore.

Amen to that Nancy!

I found recently even without knowing it myself, at first, that I was actually doing this. It lead to a complete relapse in my thinking/drinking again. Not just a simple slip but a complete relapse. It can be so difficult to regain some perspective in ones thinking once this has happened too. I thought I would of recognised the patterns by now but new feelings and emotions got the better of me this time.

Love and Happiness
Hippie
xx