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    #1

    Where are the moderators??

    It seems to me that this website has turned more into a place for people who have serious drinking problems and are trying to get back to being healthy. (which is a good thing)

    Not many here seem to just be looking for a way to prevent the consequences of abusing alcohol.

    Sometimes I wish that we could have posts that deal with how to drink responsibly, how to enjoy one or 2 glasses, beers, cocktails with friends and family.

    There is a lot of negative energy being focused on Alcohol. it gets sad at some points.

    booze is not a living entity. We have the choice to be sickened by it, or to enjoy it like any other food.

    peace
    You can't turn a pickle into a cucumber
    Tags: None
    #2
    Where are the moderators??

    to be honest i think the majority of us on here have had that choice taken away from us.
    there is nothing i want more out of life than to be able to drink moderately and sensibly,but seeing i havent been able to do this for the last 25 years it seems to be a bit of a tall order

    Comment

      #3
      Where are the moderators??

      Trixie - I mod. And I acknowledge your post. I will come back later...this site is for all of us...hang in there! I have to type and then log on again to post as my broadband is down and if I type as I post on thsi dial-up, it closes down on me! (Aargh!)

      I did 106 days AF and have mod-ed for 4 months successfuly.....and I realy want to carry on with the 'successful' bit if I can! So I am with you with ideas and stories needed..... I think I feel guilty posting about it as I know how lucky I am and don;t want to 'rub noses in it' but this site IS for ALL of us....

      Back later! Hope you get lots of posts.!

      Lvoe FMS xx
      :heart: c: :heart:
      "Be patient and gentle with yourself - the magic is in you."

      Comment

        #4
        Where are the moderators??

        Yes, the purpose of this site is to do it "your" way. Everyone here is on their own personal journey... no rules, no judgement just here for support and guidance. Most of us have tried to moderate but couldn't do it. Aquarius promotes moderation and gives guidence on keeping within safe limits, but I think for the majority it doesn't work. Do it "your" way, you may be able to have a cut off point. many of us can't. best of luck and let us know your progress
        Sometimes the only way to stay sane is to go a little crazy

        Comment

          #5
          Where are the moderators??

          There are quite a few of us who moderate. Some of us have been around for a few years and hang out in the subscriber section. Another reason is the mojority of the time I believe, once people really learn how to manage AL they simply leave this site because they don't "need" it anymore.

          I do agree that the more recent members just happen to be ones that prefer the abs route instead. It will shift from time to time.
          Sometimes I wonder...."Why is that frisbee getting bigger?"...and then it hits me.

          Comment

            #6
            Where are the moderators??

            yep I agree with all of your comments. my point is merely regarding the fact that one can moderate.

            pp. i think that I would like to stick around here to let people who would normally wait till it's too late

            before educating themselves.

            I am just one of those people who believes that we can enjoy everything if we respect it (nature).
            You can't turn a pickle into a cucumber

            Comment

              #7
              Where are the moderators??

              Some people can and some can not. Everyone is different. I have seen some people get to some pretty dark places and it wasn't due to lack of respect for nature.
              Sometimes I wonder...."Why is that frisbee getting bigger?"...and then it hits me.

              Comment

                #8
                Where are the moderators??

                I'm a moderator-hopeful. I'm on the last week of MWO program -- didn't need to go past 75 mils of topa and it worked fine for me. So here I am on the last week. I have a glass of wine maybe once a week, perhaps not but that's what I was shooting for. I'm a little anxious about dosing off but that's what I need to do. I'm hopeful that I will be able to maintain what I've achieved here. I'm not even sure how to dose off honestly -- do I do a week of 50 mils, then a week of 25? I don't know. This is a great place to be and I'm hopeful and thankful it's worked well so far. I'll keep on this site and we'll see how it goes.

                Comment

                  #9
                  Where are the moderators??

                  Hi Trixie--
                  I agree, I think there are more here that can't moderate. I try to check in on the moderation threads daily even though I'm not really sure what I am. I have DEFINATELY changed the way I drink, but I still seem to overdo when I'm in a social situation. Which social situations for me are usually pretty big parties (weddings, funerals, benefits) which include all my drinking/smoking buddies. With no social events in the near future, and a nasty cold, I've been abstaining all week. I hope I can learn to go out and moderate.....I just don't know, I guess I haven't tried very hard yet. If not, I don't see me quitting drinking totally, just probably will avoid certain situations, or deal with the consequences.
                  Sorry if I rambled. I'll check back later...
                  _______________
                  NF since June 1, 2008
                  AF since September 28, 2008
                  DrunkFree since June 1, 2008
                  _____________
                  :wings: In memory of MDbiker aka Bear.
                  5/4/2010 In loving memory of MaryAnne. I pray you've found peace my friend.
                  _______________
                  The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you.ray:

                  Comment

                    #10
                    Where are the moderators??

                    lvt25 I did what you are saying above, I avoided certain social situations and also didn't keep alcohol in the house for about 9 months.

                    I also keep a picture in my mind of myself totally drunk and stupid and making no sense. this seems to keep me from going overboard.

                    in regards to respect for nature, I think maybe I wasn't clear.

                    maybe I should have said one needs to be be very aware and diciplined.
                    you don't eat the whole cake in one sitting, and you also don't throw back the whole bottle of champagne by your self.
                    little rules.
                    You can't turn a pickle into a cucumber

                    Comment

                      #11
                      Where are the moderators??

                      Hi Trixie!

                      I'm in mods cuz I don't know where I really want to be. (Did I ever know where I wanted to be, other than in a mansion or in the Bahamas with some rich dude who doted on me?!) Yeah, right.
                      I can't do church or AA in my small town, esp since I'm in a respected profession and am considered an "authority." I count every small step I make. I admire the abstinence group especially, but am giving myself kudos for even the smallest of my victories. To get to 1 or 1-1/2 cocktails a day is a milestone for me. The supps, nutrition and these threads have gotten me there. I will sing when I get to my first AF day. I appreciate your threads. They help me celebrate every small victory.

                      Comment

                        #12
                        Where are the moderators??

                        the book huh

                        i have been on the AA site for support but cant continue Im what this lady says is a functioning alcoholic ouch but i cant do the God thing or sit at those meetings listening to other peoples drinking problems Im not unsympathetic
                        but i beleive that my blow outs are due to my emotional distress and it becomes a vicious cycle
                        thank you for this site i am reading some great stuff and hope to be able to moderately drink
                        it looks like i need a book tho and to abstain for 30 days i did 7 and they were tough but i have a drink in hand cause i feel so very low :upset: and know if i have a wine il feel better ive been rejected by man he has been a lover for a year but not a friend and doesnt want to be good reason to have a drink i say

                        Comment

                          #13
                          Where are the moderators??

                          Trixie - I wrote you this long post and LOST IT before I could hit submit!! UGGGGGGGGGGGGG

                          So I'll give you the short version ........ I really appreciate what you posted here. It really is a good reminder to me that this site is for both abstainers and moderators. I think as of late - there was an imbalance of those trying to moderate or quit drinking that were REALLY having a tough time. It must make the true moderators want to run away. Things seem to be balancing back out - so I close the short version of this post with a ....... Thank you - as I am going to be careful in the future - as I really felt your message and think you have some very valid points. I admit to feeling that there really were not true moderators on this site - but as I thought back to your posts in the past - and quite a few others that I really respect and I know that is untrue. There are a great deal of moderators who are very successful here.

                          I really respect you - and believe your posts to always be healthy and balanced. Thanks So for your insight.

                          Liv
                          AF since Jan. 1, 2008 .... It all began right here


                          Raise your hopeful voice, you have a choice, you made it now.


                          (from the Movie "Once")

                          Comment

                            #14
                            Where are the moderators??

                            Livingfree, we're here... some of us have been for years,...
                            We just don't feel the need to "count the days" like other places.

                            Stick around, this is a wonderful place!

                            It is a bit different, but it does work, ...
                            :welcome::new::H
                            The only thing worth stealing is a kiss...:flower: zwink:

                            Comment

                              #15
                              Where are the moderators??

                              My 2 cents

                              Trixie:
                              I want to thank you for this thread, as it's just lately I've been feeling more of a community around mods. I started in January, and felt a bit like a "woman without a country to post in." Mods thread was pretty quiet. I am responsible for not posting and asking for more help but asking for help is not my strong suit (hence my moniker) so I just traveled around the boards looking for tips where I could - mostly on monthly ABS, ODAT and chat. I really, really wished there was a New to Mods? thread like there are for Newbies that I could have jumped in on: I was too inexperienced to start one.

                              I didn't post much early on because I felt being a modder in an AF crowd is like eating a banana split at Weight Watcher's meeting.

                              In the past few months I've seen questions about moderating from people new to the boards, to which ABBERs respond in spades; at times I would respond and assure the questioner that people with more mods experience would come along soon, but I don't think the questioner knew who was who, so the main message received was "most people can't mods".

                              So all in all a great topic.
                              I hope no one takes anything I've said as criticism. I am thrilled with the recent energy on the mods threads and feel I've finally found my group, so have no desire or intention of alienating anyone, just wanting share the "early experience of a 3-monther" in hopes that we can get newbies and those coming off of AF to mods the support they need.

                              Tx

                              G

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