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    #1

    Binge Drinker wanting to stop

    Hi I am new to this site but brought the 'my way out' book and have been busy reading and came across a note about the message boards.

    I am a serious binge drinker! I would love to hear from anyone with the same problem as me so we can support each other.

    Four months ago I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. I had a massive binge drinking session 3 weeks before I found I was pregnant and luckily I felt so bad about it I had tried to give up alcohol for those 3 weeks so don't think I drank while first pregnant. I didn't drink thru my entire pregnacy and felt fantastic for it! I thought I would be able to continue after I was pregnant but NO I got drunk after only 6 weeks! Then another binge at 11 weeks and then another binge just this weekend (my baby is now 15 weeks). I feel helpless and ashamed. I have a beautiful loving husband, had a successful career which I can go back to part time next year, I have great friends with no 'drama' in my life at all. I just can't control my urge to drink to the point of blacking out. I don't drink every day, in fact I can go a few weeks with out a drink but then I have 1 which leads to 2 the next night which leads to a binge session shortly after. I get really depressed and angry with myself after I drink and I have drunk this way since I was 15! I am now 33! I have no reason for doing this and really want to stop for the sake of my daughter. I am scared one day I will drink so much that something serious is going to happen to me and I will not be here for her. PLease help . . . .
    Tags: baby, binge, drink, pregnant, weeks
    #2
    Binge Drinker wanting to stop

    This could be your answer. Read around the site, lots of different stories, lots of people that drank gallons every night, some (myself included) who started small and ended up big.

    Guilt is one thing we all have in common, and losing the guilt is one of the best things about the program. No more beating yourself up, or questioning why you can't stop, why there must be something wrong with you.

    Good luck, read the book, get the supplies, and keep reading the site for someone similar.

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      #3
      Binge Drinker wanting to stop

      Unfortunately, pregnancy doesn't stop the drinking, as much as we think it will. And, there is a certain loneliness in becoming a new mother...after the excitement wears off, we have to accept this new huge responsibility and role of being someone's mother and let go of our old selves and STILL deal with a drinking problem. Yes, get yourself some help. This program will work, and with your binge drinking issue and the fact that you are still not working right now (right?), I do recommend doing it with the topamax.

      Take care of yourself. It's made a huge difference for me and my two small kids.

      Jen

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        #4
        Binge Drinker wanting to stop

        I drink once a week, and when I do, I drink to blacking out. I hate myself so much when it's over. I'm afraid that if I didn't feel so much guilt I would drink every day. I had my first drink when I was 34 and that has been 9 years ago. I have one son which is 19, and he has seen so much. I don't know that I will ever get over that.

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          #5
          Binge Drinker wanting to stop

          :l I am in the same boat. I am a binge drinker and don't ever touch anything else in the mean time. I have had a bottle of wine and beer sitting in the fridge for weeks. I drink when I am bored or trying to fit into a situation that I am not really comfortable with. I think that if you are able to start pin pointing what is making yougo there it will help. What scared me the most on my last (8 days ago) binge was that I woke up in the middle of the night in apparently a different place than I went to sleep in and ran around the cabin looking for kids. I couldn't find my oldest anywhere, so I woke up my husband and started asking him where my oldest was and he told me that I had ok's him to stay in his friends cabin and that I had been over there asleep next to him earlier in the night. To top all of that off my daughter got scratched by a fishing pole right by her eye. What if it would have been the hook in her eye. What if my son would have woken up and decided to go to the water while I was passed out. What happened to me in between cabins? I can't answer any of these questions. I have to rely on what others remember of my actions and I have a sneaking suspicion that one of them is not telling me the WHOLE story. YUCK!!!
          I never wanted my kids to see me that way. Don't let yours.
          Here we go again.

          AL FREE since Saturday the 14th of March 2009

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            #6
            Binge Drinker wanting to stop

            hi mother of 1 girl
            i have 4 kids and every time i was pregnant and breast feeding my body would not allow me to drink now my eldest child is 24 and my yougest 9 and i am still fighting the demons but with this site i know i can do it i got to 45 days af and then went on hols and didnt keep it up but i want to get back you will do it

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              #7
              Binge Drinker wanting to stop

              I am so much like you. I was very moderate during my pregnancies and have two beautiful children. I also hoped to be able to stay moderate or abstain after the pregnancies but gradually I fell into old patterns of drinkning every night, sometimes til I passed out (in bed, so my husband didn't know). I kept it a secret for many years but finally had to fess up and ask for help. (this after losing my job and my husband threatening to divorce me and take the children). I've been AF on and off for a while now, but have had many relapses (I'm AF now and I hope forever). It gets easier over time, though, as you learn more about it and what to do. And the medications are very important for me-- they are a crutch I can't manage without (but hope to someday), and the supplements help you feel better physically. Read as much as you can-- on this site and others on the internet and in the many books available on alcoholism. Knowledge helps tremendously. Good luck and I hope you never sink as low as I did.
              Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life... And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.

              Steve Jobs, Stanford Commencement Adress, 2005

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                #8
                Binge Drinker wanting to stop

                Welcome mother of 1 and Sue. I did not usually binge. Mostly it was more than was healthy often, but not to the point of a major problem. But a number of times in my life I have drunk enough to have no recollection at all of hours of activity. Very scary. There has not been a pattern or reason beyond having 1 too many and my body not doing what it is supposed to do, which is get sick so I stop. Instead it craves more and more and more. I am doing everything the book suggests, including the Topamax. I feel fabulous and so can you.

                Comment

                  #9
                  Binge Drinker wanting to stop

                  Hello Motherof1girl and Sue:

                  Both of you have taken a giant step in coming here and posting. It doesn't matter what kind of drinking problem you have (everyday drinking or binging), if it is a problem for you, then it is a problem and we are here to help. No one here judges you, only support and love will be found on these boards. Read everything you can and tell us how you are doing. I'm glad you are reading the book, it has a lot of great info on vits and supps. Our bodies need to replace so much that we have taken out of it!! Best wishes to you both!!
                  Learning to live life on the outside of a bottle. :flower:

                  Comment

                    #10
                    Binge Drinker wanting to stop

                    Hi and welcome,

                    I'm glad that you've found the MWO community. I think that one of the most powerful tools that I have gained in getting a handle on my drinking problem is self-talk. I don't know that it is talked about specifically in the book, but I think that it is just something that happens unconsciously as you go through this process. Instead of allowing myself to use the excuses that I had become accustomed to (stressful day, frustration, loneliness, ect...), I started reminding myself of how crappy I was going to feel the next day, or I'd remind myself of how nice it was when I went to bed sober and didn't wake up with the ritual anxiety and guilt. I'd tell myself to sip instead of guzzle. I'd stop at two or three instead of 5 or 6. Pretty soon I've talked myself out of drinking more often than I used to talk myself into drinking.

                    MWO is a great place, and the people here offer tremendous empathy, support, and advice. The first time that I ever admitted outloud (via internet, of course) that I had a drinking problem was here. It took awhile for me to fully involve myself in the program, but once I did, I started to notice that the quality of my life was gradually improving. Logging on here daily, really helps you to stay focused and on the right path. Good luck.

                    Julie

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