November 2nd 2008

[Mackeral]

Good morning Abbers..

I have'nt got any great pearls of wisdom for today..or a provacative thought...Just wanted to get the day started and spread some of my positive feeling...
This time last week i was scared and anxious..Trying to throw as much alcahol down my neck before my start day...

The contrast between last Sunday and today is unrecognisable...In 1 week..My life has changed from hopeless to hopeful...
I will never take for granted what being sober means again..

Have a great day all..

Love Macks:l:l:l

[charlee]

November 2nd 2008

Hey Macks
What a difference a week makes!!!....I have "trained" my brain to look at this expierience in the positive, IMHO I think it can make or break you......I try not to focus on wudda, shudda, cudda of's...that only gets me down, and hard as it may be I must look at this as a huge plus in my life, instead of a negative.....took me a while to get to this place and if I let myself I can feel the sadness and resentment of giving up the drink which then leads me to thinking "one won't hurt", "maybe I could mod", "I have this under control".....Not.....I won't go back to the dark hole.....
Keep up the positive attitude it is so important......You sound great!

[christyacc]

November 2nd 2008

Morning!

Mack, how awesome does it feel to be positive? How awesome does it feel to not wake up feeling like crap, looking like crap, treating everyone around you that you love like total sh%t? I think it's amazing! You are doing fantastic!!!!

I am doing a quick check in as I am working today. It kinda sucks, but when I am at work I am busy and not thinking about drinking. By the time I get home, I will be fine...unless the house is destroyed and no one, hubby, has done anything about it!!!! The house being in shambles and me the only one who does anything about it is a trigger for me.

Anyway...gotta fly......I will check in after work. Have a great day everyone!!!!!!

Christy

[on my way]

November 2nd 2008

Morning guys,

Wow, what more can I say, Mack, you rock!! Got through this weekend, now trying to focus in on my holiday season. I keep thinking this will get a lot easier but it seems like I just have to get more creative in how I deal with my cravings and triggers. Guess that’s the personal growth part.
Det, I will miss the garlic trapper avatar, it was very amusing. I have a busy day with the kids, not looking for any trigger troubles.

Have a good one!! nat

[MormonMom]

November 2nd 2008

Good Morning Abbers!
I was shocked to sign on and already see four of you have posted. Weekends are usually pretty slow on the Daily Thread.
Mack a BIG CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[MormonMom]

November 2nd 2008

OOPS! Hit send and didn't mean to.
Anywho, that first week is a tuffy, but you did it. Yaa it feels GREAT!
OMW, I think you need to get back on the focus of "here and now". Looking ahead at the holidays as a whole is just bringing you anxiety. You offically made it through the first holiday party of the season, as you didn't drink on Halloween. I hear you about it not getting easier. Do you remember my post regarding my friend who has 8 years sobriety? I asked her if she ever craved it and her response was a yes. This discouraged me to think that after 8 years I'd still randomly crave it. But as everyone posted on the thread, I had to just look at myself and focus on one day at a time.
We go through phases. Every day phases. I'm not craving yet today, but I'm not going to take that for granted. And of course, hubbie's not home from work yet, so that can change everything! Hee! Hee!
Well, everyone's doing a fabulous job. Charlee & Christy thanks for all your positive feed back. And of course, O2M, I fee like you're the mum of our group. It's always nice to see your feedback.
Everyone have a great Sunday and remember to be grateful for what we have, no matter how little or small it may seem.

[on my way]

November 2nd 2008

MM, you're right, ODAT

[charlee]

November 2nd 2008

Let me second that...I will always be a ODAT girl!!!!!....Looking past today, can somethimes overwhelm me.....Gotta keep it simple!

[retteacher]

November 2nd 2008

Hi Everyone:

First, Mack, congrats on the first week of sobriety. It's great to see the positive attitude. I too have done the "drink all I can before I go abs" thing. It isn't pretty.

Second, looking ahead to a life wo/booze. I'm doing just that lately. I'm still using the mantras:
-I do not drink.
-I am a non-drinker.
Yes, I too sometimes feel cheated of the "drinking experience"...especially when I see others drinking. But in my heart, I KNOW that I cannot drink normally, & never will be able to.

So, yes, the long-term committment to a life wo/drinking is always a goal for me. One that I have to remind myself of on a daily basis. But, the everyday struggle is definitely ODAT (one day at a time...for newbie's information).

Today, is my daughter's 35th b-day. Yes, you know you're old when your children are 39 & 35 respectively. Anyhow, I'm going to celebrate this one sober...just enjoy her & the kids & the lovely steak dinner my SIL has planned.

Love, Mary

[Determinator]

November 2nd 2008

Top of the Sunday ABenators far and wide!!

Macks that was quite a perl of wisdom of yours when you wrote:

I will never take for granted what being sober means again..

and I know precisely how you feel mate. well done.

OMW, not to worry, I'm redoing my 'garlic trapper' picture so that it's a little more clear photography is fun...any other shutterbugs in AB's land?

Mary, enjoy your clear minded party time with daughter

be well my friends

[Cinders]

November 2nd 2008

Hi Everyone!!

I don't have much time, I am still working. It seems that anything that could go wrong has gone wrong. Even me screwing up a few things and having to drop back and redo. Grrr.

However, it is what they pay me the big bucks for.

I guess I better enjoy it while I can, pretty soon my paycheck will shrink significantly. I am selfish, guys. I don't want to see my money go somewhere else. :upset:

However, I guess I can't complain. I recall in the 70s my daddy paid 50% income tax on his salary. He made $17K a year then!! :H

He must have been "rich," too.

Sorry for digressing.

I am sober, grateful to be sober and had a wonderful weekend with my family.

Family makes me happy. Hubby triggers me, though.

Yesterday, for a while, I wanted to drink so badly when he was just b*tching away at me for this, that and the other. I keep trying to tell him that raising his voice and complaining about me to me is a huge trigger but he can't seem to stop.

I dealt with it for years with alcohol. It put me in that "mellow" land where the stress he induced didn't matter. However, suddenly alcohol put me in that dark land where I didn't exist anymore. Someone else did. I don't like that someone else. The passed out, bruised, totally stupid drunk.

So, I worked on figuring out tools to deal with hubby's very sharp tongue. I wasn't too successful at it but I did stay sober. I do need to figure out tools to help with that issue. I have this definite inkling that hubby is not going to change. He's only had 33 years to hone his skills. :H:H

Love,
Cindi

[charlee]

November 2nd 2008

Hey Cindi
I spent alot of time in "mellow" land, trying to block out my hubby's glass half empty attitude, along with his constant complaining about things we have no control over. It's a real trip to watch the nightly news with him!!!...You are right, they will not change, and we can no longer induce ourselves to escape.....So what to do???....For me, I have learned how to put him on "ignore", while still looking at him as if I am paying attention, let it go in one ear and out the other. I have found as long as he vents, he finishes and goes about his way....usually whistling...The man just likes to listen to himself!!!..I wish I would of figured this out a long time ago, I spent many a year (when drinking), arguing back, defending the people in the news, voicing my opinion...of course to no avail....just left me frustrated and yearning for "mellow land".......

[retteacher]

November 2nd 2008

Cindi & Char: I too went to "mellow" land w/husb's moods & complaints. He can still get to me but realizing that he isn't going change now, & I can't change him (nor should I change him), helps a little. I've been trying to let him have his moods, crabbiness, discontent, etc. knowing there's nothing I can do about it. If it gets bad enough, I can just walk away. It's not our jobs to live up to our husb's expectations. Mary

[LVT25]

November 2nd 2008

Hello my MWO friends!

Just wanted to report in that I managed an AF free evening watching an embarrassing Husker football game with the in-laws! A very rare occurance in the past for sure!! I think they find it odd, but not much was said--I was driving--enough said. It is getting easier!

Hey, Charlee, I wonder if our hubbies are related. Married to a pessimistic perfectionist has its ups and downs for sure. I was the opposite though--the more I drank, the more I stood up to him and we'd end up seeing who could yell the loudest!! Because I refuse to worry about things I can't change, I am accused of not caring and sticking my head in the sand. I'm getting better about standing my ground calmly, but I need to learn to form more of my own opinions instead of just agreeing with him all of the time just to avoid a fight.

Everything is better sober---:l

[christyacc]

November 2nd 2008

Hi guys!

Had a good day! I worked all day and came home and my dinner was on the table!!!! The kids cleaned up after, did the dishes, loaded the dishwasher...WOW! It was awesome!

Today is a good day! It's day 19, on my way to 21 days! I know I shouldn't jump to 21 over 20, but 21 is a hurdle for me. It's the longest I have been sober for quite some time.