AF Daily Thursday, November 27th

[SAUSAGE]

:welcome:

Morning everyone!

Firstly I want to wish all my MWO friends in the USA a great Thanksgiving!

As you know, we don't celebrate that over here (England) but I'm paying particular attention to how you all get on (AF wise) as I have a difficult / celebratory / family time coming up too with Christmas and New Year in 4 weeks. I guess this is a time when many are tempted to drink / moderate. I've only just caught up with yesterday's thread as i've not been too well - still suffering with a fluey type cold /achy limbs. shivering etc - hot bath and early night last two nights and no exercise! Not sleeping too well either which is why i'm on line at 04.27 !!

Yesterday's thread was great - really motivated me. Those struggling with the mod concept and trying to fight it today of all days should definitely re-read yesterday's thread. Welcome to the thread Mom of 3 - loved your comment about focussing on what you are gaining not what you are missing with an AF life. I really think this is the key to success and being happy. This is what I am trying to do now and I love this thread because it really focuses on what else you can gain from a life without alcohol. I too have decided that moderation is too emotionally exhausting - and everytime i've tried it, about 3 or 4 within the last year - ( have only been dealing with my problem in the last 11 months) it always ends in disaster and the same drinking patterns as before within days. I too stay well away from the moderation part of the boards.

Well i'd better go as still not feeling too good - its' only 4.35am so I will go back to bed and try and get another hour or so's sleep before the kids wake up!

Have a great AF day everyone, will check back later

Sausage x

[Doggygirl]

AF Daily Thursday, November 27th

Good Morning! Happy Thanksgiving to all in the US, and thank you Sausage for getting us started today even though it sounds like you still feel pretty craptactular. I hope you are able get some sleep since you've gone back to bed! My experiences with decisions to drink after I recognized the need to stop ended up like yours - a fast return to the previous drinking habits. I have no interest in living like that any more.

I have much to be thankful for today, but at the top of my list is my sobriety. So many other good things in my life just aren't possible without that. Brigid is right - it is WITHIN ME that the secret to my sobriety lives. I AM my magic pill. Just like you are yours. I imagine us as a group of friends coming together and communicating in our strength - not clinging to each other in weakness. That doesn't mean we won't each have bad days. But if we are strong enough to say no to alcohol, then we are strong people. We can never let AL make us think we are weak. We are not.

We will be going to my Aunt's house for Thanksgiving dinner this afternoon - she hosts every year. Some cousins that we rarely see might be there. My youngest brother went through a divorce that finally was over about 6 months ago. He's been dating a woman he met on e-Harmony and she will be coming round to meet some family for the first time. (they are brave!) So there is lots to look forward to! I also get to work out today at Curves even though they are closed. While I was there yesterday, one of the owners said she was planning to work out this morning, and invited me to come work out with her. Life is good. More cheesecake for me. Skinny pants AND cheesecake. Does life get any better than this????? :banana:

R2C and Loppy - very good to see you both! And also hello to anyone I missed yesterday and all to come today!

I hope everyone else has wonderful plans and enjoys the day whether you are in the US and having a holiday, or whether you are somewhere else.

DG

[A Work in Progress]

AF Daily Thursday, November 27th

Good morning, everyone, and happy T-Giving to all of us in the USA! I'm going over to have T-Giving dinner with old friends and some of their family. Kinda sad, as I had a traditional dinner with some other old friends (a couple), for many years... I did much of the cooking, and loved it... but one person of the couple had some strokes, her personality completely changed, and everything changed in our relationships. The friendships were lost. Part of the landscape of the Very Difficult year of 2008.

Thanks for the wonderful, thoughtful, and insightful thread yesterday! I need to look at the way I use MWO, I think. I normally hit the "new posts" button to see what's going on everywhere. I don't usually read the "mods" threads, although sometimes I have done so (Zed, a new member, writes some fascinating stuff). I talk to newcomers a lot. And I get drawn into a lot of the things that are going on all over the boards; that's sometimes a good thing, sometimes just OK, and sometimes not good, at all. I have told people in the past that its best to find people here who have a good solid AF program, and stick with them. Sometimes, I think, its best to spend MWO time only in the areas of the boards that are most helpful. I need to take my own advice, especially during this stressful time of year!

I hope everyone has a great day! Sausage, hope you are better soon! DG, have a great T-Giving!

wip

[Tom 4.0]

AF Daily Thursday, November 27th

Good morning everyone!

Thank you all for your wisdom and support. This has been a very interesting month, new friends, new ideas and a new way of life. While it's too soon to say that I am out of the grip of alcohol, I do know that I am on my way.

[startingover]

AF Daily Thursday, November 27th

Hi everyone! And a very happy TG day to all....

[caysea]

AF Daily Thursday, November 27th

Hi All
Happy Thanksgiving To All. My biggest thanks is to the support I received when I joined this great group of people.The selfishness I had to have in the beginning of becoming AF has payed off.All the people around me are benefiting from my living a sober lifestyle.It is great doing the normal things in life without al.My wife and I traveled to Michigan to be with my daughter and her husband for thanksgiving.No thoughts of going out for al. I have enjoyed dinners out and last night went to the movies.I can truly say at this time I couldn't consider, nor want, or have any desire to drink. I could never believe when I started that this was possible.The beginning is hard but it is so worth the physical and mental fight to get were I am today.
AGAIN THANK YOU ALL


Stay Healthy and Keep Fighting
AF 5-16-08

[retteacher]

AF Daily Thursday, November 27th

Hi All: In years past, when I've put on T-giving dinner, I've spent the whole day prior to T-giving cooking & drinking, thus waking up on T-giving morn w/a hangover, only to drink again on the actual T-giving day. I don't know what I was thinking...perhaps that was the way others did it...at least that's how I justified it. Anyhow, not so this year. I'm bright-eyed & bushy-tailed & ready to start the real cooking! Yesterday was a mix of cooking & relaxing...NO DRINKING. Likewise today, I will not be drinking. I don't even fantasize about it.

After I post this, I'm going to reread yesterday's thread. I know it will inspire me. BTW, I have trouble w/some of the other forums, because when I read about people successfully modding, I think I might be able to do it too. I've proven to myself that I absolutely cannot. Therefore, I must hang out mostly w/folks who are trying AF for a period of time or for life. It's black or white for me...no gray areas.

Take care everyone. Mary

[charlee]

AF Daily Thursday, November 27th

Morning everyone and Happy Thanksgiving
Mary, I too, so remember those holiday mornings waking up with such a hangover, and having so much to do.....I would exhaust myself just trying to look and feel on top of things when I really knew I looked like crap and felt even worse. I would plan my vacation schedule at work trying to get "the day after off"...especially Super Bowl Sunday!!!!.....
Everyone please have a safe happy holiday

[A Work in Progress]

AF Daily Thursday, November 27th

Mary, I used to open a bottle of wine while I was doing the morning cooking every Thanksgiving; usually I was hung over, too ( I was usually hung over in the mornings!)... I would drink all day while cooking. Usually I wasn't terribly drunk, at that point, as I'd always get a good meal on the table... but one year I DID drop the turkey on the kitchen floor! Scooped it back up, wiped it off, and put it on the table... Of course, once dinner started, I'd drink more heavily... Yuck.

I haven't really found that I get tempted by stories of "successful modding," because when you read between the lines, you can nearly always see that people are posting about the times that they DO succeed in keeping their drinking within limits, and they take that as an encouraging sign that they will, someday, always be able to do so. They believe and hope that their episodes of out-of-control or excessive drinking will gradually go away. The people who are always able to do drink within limits are, at least from what I have observed, very few and far between. Maybe the really ("like butter") successful "modders" just don't stick around here. I don't know. Most of the folks I read about here are "trying to mod," which to my mind is the same thing as "having a drinking problem." At best, it could be considered a version of "harm reduction," or drinking less than they did when they got here; and of course that IS a good thing; it's just not what I am looking for, in my life.

My own temptations come mostly from my own mind, and in seeing people I care about deciding to drink again. I guess it isn't so much that I believe they will be successful, as it is a self-destructive impulse, the siren call of alcohol. Again: yuck. When I think it through, as to what it would mean for me to follow the path of others who have started drinking again... it has no appeal at all. It is horrifying.

wip

[Cinders]

AF Daily Thursday, November 27th

Happy Thanksgiving, Everyone.

It was great to wake up sober today, know I will be sober all day and wake up sober tomorrow. All of this means I will remember the entire day, I will not say or do amazingly stupid things, especially in front of the grandchildren, and my pregnant daughter won't be tempted by my drinking.

It does feel pretty darned good!

Love,
Cindi

[Determinator]

AF Daily Thursday, November 27th

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!!!!!

I'm so grateful for everyone here. for the friendship, intellectual musings and the fun times too.
I know my recovery has been possibly because of your positive energy.

My biggest challenge will be dealing with the big crowd this afternoon/evening. We are heading to a big multi-family get together and while it will be fun, I just don't do well in crowds. Will have to remember to do some abdominal breathing, step out for air, etc etc.
also brining my own alternative beverages. No matter what it's not worth drinking over!

wow DG, skinny pants and cheesecake? ahahahahah! awesome.

be well friends

[greeneyes]

AF Daily Thursday, November 27th

Happy Thanksgiving everybody!!

This get-away is wonderful for me. Everybody drinks a couple (I think, as I'm not even paying attention) glasses of wine here & there. Board games after dinner, so much fun and laughing sober. My sister looked at me this morning and said "I'm really glad you're here". That's nice. I'm sure my friends would have adopted me if I were home, but I really needed to get away. I hope everyone is doing well and is warm and happy and content with being sober in whatever setting you find yourself. :l

[Guest]

AF Daily Thursday, November 27th

Happy thanksgiving to those of you from the states. I mean that.. I wish you a happy one.

You know, this issue about looking at mods threads seems to be a big one.. also what parts of the board we frequent.

It would be hard for me to assess whether people are successful at modding or not here. Its just not clear who is and who isnt. 2 months of modding.. what is the measure of success? Agonizing over what drink to have isnt it for me and cos I dont go to those threads so I have no idea. When I used to go there the agony there was too much for me to bear because I have lived that agony. I couldnt find a measure of success there when I looked those years ago... it just was agony for me to read. I have no wish to relive it. No one could help me out of that agony, when I was in it.. I had to do that myself.

And even if someone CAN mod.. its MY reality that I cant. I know this because I tried it a hundred times and failed. I have to stay honest to this truth. So, if I cant mod, best I work on what I CAN do. Its a big problem with these anonymous forums because people come and go and when new people start they get told to post lots and join in. Join in what, I wonder? The post fest. Of course its good to welcome new people, I'm not saying it isnt.. but the reality is (in my opinion here) that for people who come to a forum such as this, the VAST majority cannot mod. And my choice was that I choose not to take some medication with awful side effects to get sober.. I dont want to replace one addiction with another. That meant some hard times at the beginning for me, but I dont regret it now. I have a clear measure of what I have done.. no drink from x date. Clean and simple.

Sounds easy huh? (not)

At the moment I am reading this thread only. I love that it is serious and I am conscious that my being here puts some people off because I am so hard nosed abstinence based. People can think that because I have over 3 years of abstinence behind me that I dont know what they are going through, or that I have lost my empathy, or that I have forgotten how hard it was, or that for some reason it was easy for me. None of this is true, but I will limit my posting here so as not to put people off.

I've said it before.. this getting me sober was the hardest thing that I have ever done and I dont regret it for one minute.

Take care all and stay honest with yourselves.
Brigid

[momof3]

AF Daily Thursday, November 27th

Happy TG to all,

I am so thankful for my sobriety this TG. As mentioned on this thread, it is the foundation of all that is good. Last year at this time, I was in a very bad place. I recall on TG day (some of it I don't remember) that I started drinking around noon. I was on yet another antidepressant that I was having a terrible time with (duh! wasn't quite seeing that the AL was causing my depression) . I cooked dinner in my stupor and almost fell into my mashed potatoes during the meal. All of this in the presence of my daughters, husband, and mother-in-law. I went to bed soon after dinner and slept through to the next day.

Fast forward to this year...I got up early and ran the local 5 mile Turkey Trot. Came home, showered, and went to the movies with my girls and my hubbie. Right now, the turkey is in the oven, the girls are playing outside and a friend just arrived to join us for dinner. Wow!

I'm thankful for the pearls of wisdom from this wise group of folks here who are serious about their sobriety. I especially like, "I am my own magic pill." That one has stuck with me all day.

Happy Turkey Day to All in the US and Happy Day to those in other countries.

Be Well,
Mo3

[Miss Behaving]

AF Daily Thursday, November 27th

one of my increasingly occasional very quick check ins for me! Enjoy your turkeys everyone!

It has been a busy week travelling and I no longer take my lap top (too much hassle and I quite enjoy not continually being accessible!) so that means lots of catching up on things when I get home. Had dinner with Boozehag on Monday night which was great ..... failed to notice the famous (in NZ anyway) people at the next table until she PMed me the next day!!

Friday here and I wish I could post this beautiful day to everyone who is feeling cold! Brilliant blue sky, no wind, tuis singing in the trees (and kittens looking out the cat door at them!!). Went for a long walk along the coast this morning. We had the first lettuce from our garden last night, and I noticed this morning that we have the first flowers on our tomato plants!! We dont celebrate thanksgiving but today I am feeling very grateful for the joys of spring!!

Off in an hour to a family thing for the weekend which I'm not much looking forward to. However, with several recovering alcoholics in the family, not to mention those who have been at the receiving end, I know that there will be no alcohol. Just lots of stress and irritation!! Driving up with my favourite brother and we have printed off lots of jokes to get us into a good mood so that we arrive happy!! Uncle Mame is relieved to be able to have to stay behind to look after the kittens!