Poured it all Out

[belovedconsole]

Made it today, first day, had to leave work I felt so poorly from that last weekend binge. Laid down here and was fine a couple hours later, but got hit a nasty existential shock: reading the biography of my hero (well at least his ideas) Alan Watts, turns out he was a womanizer and a total alcoholic; the very person who made Zen so accessible.

I ordered the Kudzu today, I told this woman I've started seeing about my intent.

When I have more money I am really looking forward to the hypnosis CD's.

Went to DMV, I was really sensitive being surrounded by so many foreign human vibrations. The lady who helped is 68, she kept calling me 'baby' and 'sweetheart'. We must have a really good DMV.

So this morning is when I poured out the remaining vodka and beer.

Now having some good Chinese food and may go out and get a book that is inspiring.

Fed the cat.

Very glad this community is here.

[Accountable for Me]

Poured it all Out

Good for you for taking those first steps!

How disappointing about Alan Watts! Geesh!

Welcome to MWO!

[Determinator]

Poured it all Out

Belovedconsole, that is a wise thing you have done. Welcome to you.

[peacenik]

Poured it all Out

men are only men after all...


good luck on your search!

[startingover]

Poured it all Out

Hey BC, welcome, it sounds like you are on the right track...well done on these first steps.

[j-vo]

Poured it all Out

Welcome Beloved, and good for you pouring out the sauce.

[Popeye]

Poured it all Out

Well done. I'm sure you can do this.
You sound strong and determined.

[brittzak]

Poured it all Out

Welcome! Sounds like you have a plan.

[notevergivingup]

Poured it all Out

:welcome:

Twosox

[Seacailin]

Poured it all Out

Welcome and :goodjob:

[belovedconsole]

Poured it all Out

I got through yesterday, there were some bizarre panicky moments where my sensitivity to other people's vibes was way turned up.

But as the day wore on and I stuck to being on here and reading about various remedies I started feeling well.

I found (through a link on here) information on EFT and I performed a number of these exercises, designed to clear the body's chakra channels.

It seems to have been helpful though I will say I hardly slept last night; but I was relaxed and fairly comfortable.

I did notice that with the EFT some memory-type stuff was coming up, images but without heavy emotional price-tags, which had the effect of me feeling like an observer of some internal stuff while it didn't have a negative emotional power over me.

Looking forward to another AF today.

[startingover]

Poured it all Out

Thats great new BC. I find being here helps me enormously to keep my resolve..
My very early af days were fraught with anxiety and mood swings, but that passes. Oh, I can still be a moody whatsit, but thats just me I guess :-)
Well done on your AF time, it just gets better and better