my estranged husband has confessed to me our 8 year old daughter dreads coming home on an evening incase I get drunk, there have been a few evenings over xmas when I've had more than I should whilst looking after them, I am so disgusted and ashamed, now her fears are out they have come to the surface and she is constantly asking me if I'm ok, looking at me for signs and asking how much I'm drinking, I have limited my consumption to 2 glasses a night and am going to bed when they do to stop myself ''carrying on'' I am so scared I'll let her down, this is particularly hard as my mother was an alcoholic who drank all day and this was the last thing I wanted for my children, I only separated from my husband in oct after 22 years so its been a tough few months for us all, thanks to anyone who replies:thanks:
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Hi Claudia, poor poor you, but you could use this not to get down but to give you some strength to control your drinking.
Don't beat yourself up, you have had a tough time over the last few months and it's not surprising that you've found solace in the bottle, especially if it is in your family and a weakness with you - as it is with everyone on this site!
Sounds like a great wake up call to me and there are loads of people here to help you through and lots of advice if you read the threads, book.....
Take care.
AC x x x -
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hay, i can only imagine how heartbreaking that is for you, but also inspiration, hold on to hte feeling of how it will be when you are sucessfull at being AF & how happier & safer your daughter will feel.
good luck & know that we are here for you, I to have gone to bed rediculsly early in orderr not to drink, when i first come here. you do waht you have to in order to stay strong.*Witchy*
Progress, not perfection!!!
A craving wont kill me, but drinking could!!!Comment
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thankyou bothComment
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Claudia,
I can not imagine how difficult it must be for you and your daughter.
22 years in a relationship is a LONG time. All of you must be suffering.
I know I am stating the obvious here,....but it will be easier on all of you if you are drinking less or not drinking at all. Use this as a positive wake up call to move forward and build a better relationship with yourself, your children and perhaps your estranged husband.
Thinking of you all. Let us know how you are getting on.Amelia
Sober since 30/06/10Comment
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Hey Claudis - a big part of your answer is firstly in your acceptance and willingness to change - so many keep blaming other circumstances etc and sadly, remain in denial, to the sorrow of all.
You will find tons of help, support and understanding here.
Good for you for taking the first step! It WILL get better, HONEST!!!!*Serenity is the calm WITHIN the storm*
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Claudia, I do know how you feel. My daughter also hated that I drank and would do the same thing, ask if I was okay, be worried etc. I just now managed to quit when she's 15, so I'm glad you are aware of this earlier in the stage and don't let it continue like I did. Become a sober, clear headed mommy and those memories will fade for her. I can't tell you how wonderful it feels for your daughter to hug you and not have to turn your head so she doesn't smell your breath. Those moments are worth the struggle, when you don't have to hide and can be totally "there".
Stick with this site. Remember how bad you feel now. Use it to make you strong. I keep a little token in my pocket that says "think of others" to remind me how my actions affect the people I love.
Wishing you well. :lYou, as much as anyone in the universe, deserve your love and respect. ~ BuddhaComment
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Claudia, I don't have any children, but I know your pain about this has to be driving you to a drink. It's gonna be hard for you, but put that demon away. Both the drinking and the feeling you have about your daughter not wanting to be with you...... I agree your daughter is 8 years old and you still have time to put good memories in her head to get the negative ones out of her head.
(I have step children....and grandkids) I, for the most part never drank in front of my grandkids, but they are to young to remember drunk Granny. I strife everytime I am with them, to make good memories.
Make good memories for your daughter!!!! Good Luck!RUM IS POISON AF since 09/28/09
"The hangover last a lot longer than the buzz!!!" quote from FloridaBoyComment
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Hello Claudia and Welcome
What I have put my kids through over the years is inexcusable. Thank God I had 10 years sober before, so at least they had a bit of a reprieve. Life is very different now. I am divorced. My son is moving out on Friday, so it will just be my daughter and me left. She is planning to move out in the summer and I will be alone, so I better get it together Now."Decide-Which Voice in Your Head you Can Keep Alive" (Shinedown)Comment
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that is hard, I can only imagine how hard it must be, I hate myself because I look forward to my child free weekends when I can drink, how sad is that? are you af at the moment seacalin??? thanks everyone for your supportSeacailin;535118 wrote: Hello Claudia and Welcome
What I have put my kids through over the years is inexcusable. Thank God I had 10 years sober before, so at least they had a bit of a reprieve. Life is very different now. I am divorced. My son is moving out on Friday, so it will just be my daughter and me left. She is planning to move out in the summer and I will be alone, so I better get it together Now.Comment
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Hugs to Claudia
Sending you big hugs, hun. :huggy
I know thisis a difficult time for you, but as everyone has already said, you have come to the right place. We all have problems and one of thim is alcohol. I have been drinking havily for nearly five years--before that, harldy at all. It got to the point where I got smashed every night. Falling down stairs, TUI, the whole bit.
MWO can save your life, your sanity and your family. Don't beat up on yourself, just get it together as best you can. We will be here when you need us--so come talk to us whenever you feel a craving.Comment
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Claudia, I can't begin to imagine what you are going through. Just be gentle with yourself, and do what you need to do for yourself and your daughter. We will be here to support you.Dill
Don’t forget, you can: start late, start over, be unsure, try and fail AND STILL SUCCEED!
If it is important to you, you will find a way. If not, you will find an excuse.Comment
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you're all fab, thankyou so much:thanks::hComment
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no, stop!
No, really, stop.
You are too kind.
No no, really! I mean it--you are embarassing us.:giggle:
Really, I must insist you stop.
Oh, well, if you insist...YES, we are ALL just FAB! :H
And so are you!
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