Sunday September 3rd

[gabby]

Hey Guys,
Boy I missed a busy day yesterday. I started early myself at the farmers market for my batch of green chile and then spent the rest of the day working. And now for my first post as mayor of absville. Tough act to follow tho after Dear Kathy. Thanks Kath. And gee....I would hardly even call that a slip you had. Just a gentle reminder of whats important right now if you ask me. And it sounds like the topa is doin its job if it didn't taste to great. I swear that is what has gotton me to this point of now 88 days. And to think when I set out on this program I was only gonna do 30 days and then go mods. Sure is funny how the modivation can kick in. Right now as many of you shared I dont think mods is what I want now at all. I feel to good to think of that.

Jenn, I'm glad things are going so positive with you and your daughter. I agree with the rest of the gang, It surly will make for a better outcome for both of you I bet. Whats mip tho?

And Bambs, I loved your humor in your post yesterday. It sais that you are feeling a bunch better. So good to see.

Nancy, Your so right about what could'a happened but thank GOD hasnt to us here in absville. I am so happy that we are all here working on our alcohol dependancy's instead of having to deal with a situation like Audrey's.

Gina, Welcome Back! Glad you are joining us. You'll like it here. Best neighbors you could ever find. Day 6 today! So Good for You.!
Susan, as always you are quite the inspiration. Its like you know where you have been and clearly know where your going from here. Sometimes it seems like that is the hardest part.

Pansy you too I am so happy to see here. Happy day 2. You know how quickly the days add up so just stick around and we can help ya get there.

Kate you too. Always room for anther neighbor.

Sola, Phil and Bill. You three are helping Absville grow bigger and bigger. Before long we will need a builder. Welcome all three of you. Look forward to your posts.

Mike, when your ready for that AF party let me know and I'll bring some Green Chile.

And my dear Mack. Your gonna be getting more and more plumming jobs. It will help out with your 12 year olds mood swings.

Brigid, Its so cool that you still have a vacation spot here in absville and continue to come and encourage us along. Dont stop doin that.

Well heres to a safe wonderful AF weekend. I hope I didn't forget anyone except for Lou Lou. And I know your doin ok. Will check back later today. Gabby

[Mackeral]

Sunday September 3rd

Morning Abbers,
First of all Thankyou Kathy for a brilliant week,you did an excellent job and deserve a well earned lie-in this morning.How did you find it?easy?tough?
Things are better this morning, me and my daughter had a good chat and cuddle and a lot of the air has been cleared. Think we're even closer now if that was possible. Shes just a pain in the arse sometimes but i think that comes with her job discription.
Was gonna go to the car boot sale this morning but buying all the back to school gear has cleaned us out this week.its not as if our house is'nt full of enough junk anyway.
Would like to say good luck to Gabby for the coming week ( good start by the way ) your gonna make an excellent mayor aswell..I took in what you said the other day about being a drunken husband slobbering all over my wife...And you're dead right...Things between us have improved immensley...We did row a lot and it was always about my drinking,but when your drunk you are never wrong and will argue the fact till your blue in the face...
Right gonna be back later..Not got a busy day today so i can pop in from time to time to have a nosey whats going on...Have a brilliant Sunday everybody in Absville..think the world of you all.....Mackeral.....:l
P.S. cant wait to get my sword.

[wellseasoned]

Sunday September 3rd

Good morning, all!
Gabby, an mip is Minor in Possession. Here in Michigan, we have the toughest mip laws in the country. My daughter (20) was at a party at MSU and when the police came she went out the back door. The police woman came up to her and she had a cup with a drink in her hand. Hence the MIP. Like I said, things happen for a reason. We are both doing 90 day abs now (she doesn't know that I am doing it with her yet).
Mack, you are right about a drunk in an argument! We are ALWAYS right! My poor hubby has spent many a night sleeping in the guest room because I refused to give up my ground. He won't get into a fight with me when I have had anything to drink so it is always a lonely time for me! I certainly like our evenings MUCH better when I am not drinking! Besides, I am not always right, for pity sakes! Where the heck did I ever get that idea? Alcohol certainly does mess with the mind! Well DUHHHH.......!!!!!
Love reading all of your posts here in absville and elsewhere at this site.
You guys are the BEST
Jenn

[YoungAtHeart]

Sunday September 3rd

Good Sunday Morning!

Hi All!

Gabby, you look beautiful up there are the top of the page, your Honor! I can tell you're going to do a great job already! I think that we will all have something unique to offer as Mayor. I had great role models like Donna, Dierdre and Susan--talk about tought acts to follow!!

Anyway, didn't get much of a sleep in this morning, only until 8:30, but I guess I shouldn't complain, since I went to sleep at 11:00pm!:H I woke up with a sinus headache though, so I'm working on getting rid of that right now.

I'm taking Abs a day/week/month at a time here, but Audrey's drunken blackout and the horrible consequences are haunting. I'm one of the lucky ones who've never had anything REALLY BAD happen to them! A story like that makes you realize that tragedy could just be one drunken jaunt away. It doesn't have to be drinking and driving, either. Two of my clients have lost adult siblings in drunken non-driving accidents in the last five years.

I'm so glad to see so many new people here. Welcome to all of you! I'm looking forward to getting to know you all! It will be great having some guys here to keep Macks company, too. He's done great holding his own with all the women in Absville, but there's always room for more fellows around here, and I welcome the male perspective on things! And Macks, I'm working on getting that sword all shiny. I know how much it means to you!

Hugs to all!
Kathy:l

[Bambino]

Sunday September 3rd

Good afternoon all here in lovely Absville - and especially to our new lord and master - Gabbs !!!! Think you'll do a great job as mayor keeping us all going here.
I bet Kathy has her feet up as we speak sipping a long cool drink ( non alcoholic ) and just ....chillin !!- and well deserved too !!!

Glad that you made it up with your daughter Macks , it made me feel warm inside when you said about your chat and cuddle. she's of 'that age' - I remember me being the same - actually still am a bit. hee hee !!

DIY day today it's been a bit of a theme for me this weekend, and it all started with a mad smoke alarm ! we went out and bought those fan/light things today - why we need a fan in the UK i really don't know - perhaps it's for that small window of a 30 minute heatwave that we have over here ! Anyway Lee likes the look of them so we have one for the living room and one for the bedroom. - steamy ????!!!! :H
The bedroom one is up, but doesn't work, but I changed the light switches yesterday, so I think it might be my re-wiring - oops.
:nutso:
Am handing in my resignation for elctrician here in Absville.

Smoke alarm is up, and I'm about to drill holes in the walls ( baaaaad idea ) to put up some curtain hold backs. - I am dreading it - the walls will probably collapse, so we'll need a builder here in Absville then.

erm what else to report, not much except for made some chicken and veg soup , a huge batch to freeze some - I'm sure that fascinated you.
I know - I'm waffling again.

[Guest]

Sunday September 3rd

Sunday

What happened to Audrey is what we call in AA "The Yets". It keeps in perspective that no matter how bad someone's story is--the only real difference between me and that person is that it didn't happen to me YET. I have a lot of "yets" that I do not want to experience.

In the Oprah magazine I read a good tool for making decisions called the 10-10-10 rule. I equated it to taking that first drink, but had to add a few more 10's to make it work for me.

If I take that first drink what will happen in:

10 minutes--probably start to feel that wonderful "why did I ever want to stop drinking" feeling
10 hours--I would either be passed out or waking up with a raging hangover--trying despately the remember everything I did--with embarassment and guilt seeping in
10 days--probably sitting in that dark hole again
10 months--be trying desparately to get out of the dark hole
10 years--dead or in jail. Have ruined my kids childhoods. Proabaly divorced. Lost my job and any self respect I ever had.

I agree that moderation is most likely a pipe dream for many--I know it is for me. But everyone has to walk their own path and I respect that. I just pray that they never have to experience some 'yets' on that path. And I do agree that anyone who gets to the point of looking on-line for help--most likely can not truly moderate. But that is only my opinion.

Kim

[gabby]

Sunday September 3rd

Hi guys,
Good to see you that are already checked in. I really don't know what I'm gonna do bein the mayor and all so....I guess I'll just go with it.

Mack's the early bird for today so your prize is a new robot style-go on its own, super deluxe, vacume cleaner for your house here in absville! I figured tha'd be a good one for you with all them kids and all. And Sparkey Bambino will be calling you to set up an appointment with to install it. Being the mayor of absville I offically don't accept her resignation as the electrician of our community. So be lookin for her call. And she is so right about the cuddle time with your girl. That stuff stays in her sweet heart. Keep on puttin it in there Dad. To this day I cherish those sweet times I remember with my own Dad. I read too once that a daughters most impressionable years with her father are those between the years of 11ish and 14ish, I think. Something like that. Good that your staying close to her.

Jenn, I sure can relate to what you and your daughter are going through. Similar stuff with my son too. He's 17 and on probation as well. Its for the same possession. Pot tho. My fear is that he has to have clean UA's for that and it will push him into drinking instead. Sheese to... have my dreathers....I'd sooner pick the pot. I know that sounds bad but I really think the drinking is worse. I so worry now that cuz he cant do his frist choice he will pick drinking instead. Its not like I can just force him to stay in his room. I remember so well what it was like to be a teenager. And that is the worst part. Is I know I cant actually stop him. I can only do my best to influence him to make the better choices. uhhgg....parenting my teens right now is the hardest so far. So I hate to tell ya Mack....but just wait. :upset: Jenn, it sounds like your being a good mom full of support!

Kath, thanks for your encouragement. And I sure share your feelings on when ya think of so many things that could happened to us or as a result of our actions before we...all of us found MWO. So good that we are all here working on things and want to continue. Its really neat - the connection all seem to share. And Kim, I agree that it seems like near impossible to be mod's when you really, really look at all the components of our dependences of alcohol. Just to many things directly involved that drinking destroys for us ever able to re-manage. I do believe that if you crossed over from being a moderate drinker to someone that abuses alcohol, regardless of the level of abuse....ya cant go back to moderation. And like you said, if your here online lookin for help....well hello....ya probably have crossed over and need to accept it right there.

Ok...okie dookie. On with my day and I'll see ya all later. gabbs

[sujul]

Sunday September 3rd

Good Morning Abbers!

A huge THANK YOU to Kathy--terrific job as major! And another huge THANK YOU to Gabby--you're doing great! Switching weeks is a fabulous idea...it prevents the burnout I think some of us (well, me anyway ) experienced trying to do it for longer periods of time...

Bambs, I had a good laugh over your smoke alarm experience-I once had to beat a singing Xmas card to death...it just WOULD NOT shut up!!

Jenn, Macks, I can identify with that drunken righteousness some of us experience...what, ME WRONG!! NO WAY!! Things are MUCH happier on the homefront with me abs and my long-suffering partner is ever so grateful....

Kim, you are SO right about the "yets"...when I began drinking again after 11 years of abs, I went through successive meetings up with my "yets" over the 10 years I tried to moderate... fortunately, nothing as bad as Audrey K., but stuff like not drinking in the day (yet), then drinking in the afternoon but not in the morning (yet), then drinking in the morning but not drinking hard liquor again (yet), then drinking some vodka here and there but not drinking a fifth a day (yet)....and the more serious consequential yets: I hadn't lost my health (yet) then I was dx'ed as diabetic but I wasn't really sick (yet) then I also had high blood pressure and high cholesterol...I hadn't lost a job due to drinking (yet) but I quit one in a druggy/drunken fit...I hadn't lost the love of my life (yet) but the arguments were increasing...I hadn't lost my friends (yet) but I was isolating and staying home to drink rather than get together for non-(heavy) drinking events...well, you get the idea...lots of "yets" I've managed to pre-empt, but I know they're waiting for me if I start up again....

Okay, enough already! I'm "yetted out" at this point!

It's an overcast day here in Vermont this holiday weekend so I think I'll just putter about the cabin...have a great day all!

And :welcome: to all the newbies here--Absville is a FABULOUS place to live!
:h
susan

[gabby]

Sunday September 3rd

Susan, lol, We had ta been pushin submit nearly at the same time. That always makes me laugh. Like always so good to have a true old timer here. You guys keep me goin!
Big smiles. gabby Day 89!

[YoungAtHeart]

Sunday September 3rd

Inspiration!

You are all such an inspiration to me. Boy, do I know about the yets! I am so fortunate not to have experienced them, YET! And I DON'T want to experience them either! This past week has contained a number of gems, like "The last drink isn't the problem, it's the first!" That one has been ping-ing around in my head all week. It has a very profound thunk to it! I like the 10-10-10 saying too, Kim!

Hey Bambs, with practice, I think you'll be a great electrician! When you're ready, I have LOTS of work for you to do!!:H And Macks, I have a few plumbing problems too, have I already mentioned that??? How do I get you guys here? Oh, wait, I'm Glinda (see thread in General Discussion). Maybe I can get you into my bubble and get you both over here to the US! Lovely thought!

Susan, I respect your story so much, and I'm glad that you did climb back out of your hole again, espec. so that we can enjoy the wisdom you have to share. I'm sure your partner appreciates it too!

Jenn, your daughter will so appreciate what you are doing when she understands. She is helping you, and you are helping her! What a gift for each of you!

Yeah, that anger thing, yuck! I generally tend to be a HAPPY DRUNK, but those few times when I get my IRE UP, WATCH OUT WORLD!!!

Gabbs, look how good you're doing already! See, I told you! But Susan is right, a week or two max, or else it is burn-out city!

I'm sewing, sewing, sewing, get those flaggies rollin! Rawhide! Cappucino, get me goin'!!

Hugs,:l
Kathy

[mikeupnorth]

Sunday September 3rd

It's a beautiful day to be sober

Hey y'all,

One of the advantages of living in the Alaska time zone is that, by the time I get up and check the board, there are usually quite a few entertaining and inspirational posts to read. Lucky me! Anyway it is a lovely early fall day here in Alaska -- the sun is shining, the leaves are golden, the grass is green, the air is crisp, and I'm not hung over.:happy: What a wonderful feeling. I should do this more often!

Anyway, the house here in Abbsvile is starting to take shape, and I was thinking tomorrow might be a good day for the AF party. We could celebrate: all the newbies (myself included), changing of the guard from Kathy to Gabby, Labor Day, Macks and his daughter surviving a row, Susan going back to seminary, Gabby reaching 90 days!,:wd: sobriety in general, and whatever else you want to celebrate. Heck, if any of us end up online at the same time we could head over to the chat room and really let our hair down! Gabby, get the green chile ready, I love green chile stew!

Kim, I wanted to thank you for reminding me of the "yets" and for sharing the 10-10-10 rule. I wish I had a printer at home so I could print that out & put it on the fridge. It is so true. I might feel good 10 minutes from now if I took a drink, but in 10 hours I would feel like shit and in 10 years I might not even be around....

You know, when I look back over my struggle with alcohol, I get a bit angry over how much time I have "lost" trying to control my drinking. What I mean by that is that it was time that I KNEW I had a problem but continued drinking, experimenting with different ways to drink this, drink that, do whatever to be able to continue drinking, rather than QUIT and move on. All those years that I wasted trying to salvage a relationship with alcohol rather than investing in myself and in meaningful relationships with other people. I am sick of it, and if I don't let it go it will consume my life. Even if it doesn't kill me it will prevent me from ever living any kind of fulfilling life. So why cling? Like an ex-lover who is no longer good for me, I have to let it go and not look back.

OK well I guess that's enough from me right now. I will check in with you fine folks later!

Mike

[gabby]

Sunday September 3rd

Kath, Its fun...but like uh...oh kinda like uh....a self help assignment kinda thing. Ya know what I mean? Kinda like work. :H Fun work...but ya have ta think :H Homework, like work. So a week or two could begin to take over your brain or somethin like that. :nutso: gabbs

[Lou]

Sunday September 3rd

Hey guys!

Sorry its a late check in, been a busy little bee today! was up early and at the gym...really pushed myself today so im rather pooped!!!
Then met my sort of new bloke for alcohol free lunch (only second date) but he is gorgeous and such a sweetie...cant help but keep waiting for the catch but i have to go with this cause i aint had butterflies in my tummy when iv been kissed for years so i hope its somethin special, i feel like im 16 agail..lol!!! he is away with work for 2 wks now tho so ill be pining away!!
And now i have my one and only neice Freya with me for a couple of hours to give her mum a break...she is only 5 months old and absolutely beautiful she is makin me so broody even tho she has been sick on me 3 times already!!!...I WANT BABIES!!! best not let my new man hear me say that as he'll prob run a mile..lol!!!
Anyways glad everyone seems in fine form today...I'm of to get thrown up on again!!(prob my own fault for givin her choccie buttons...she loves them!!)

Love to you all

Lou-Lou and lil Freya x x x x x

[Lou]

Sunday September 3rd

Sorry Gabbs

Forgot to say...fine job your doing lady, keep it up honey x

Love ya loads

Lou-Lou x x

[gabby]

Sunday September 3rd

Hey Mike, Good to hear from ya!
I can't wait for the party. What time does it start? Yes! I'll bring the green chile, tortillas, cheese and chips. And some Pink Lemonade too. Sounds like great fun.
What a great way to put our relationship with alcohol equal to trying to salvage a relationship with an ex-lover that is no longer good for us. Goin down a dead end street. Fighting a loosing battle. Yet we kept on trying and wasted so much time. Wow. Well no more time wasted. Moving on to prettier pastures.
And on to work for me. Fun day everyone and those yet to post. gabby