my worst drinking experience

[finallyfree]

A few months ago my husband and I broke up and for some strange reason I started feeling extremely horny. Now, I have been married for 12 years and never felt like that in my life - but when he left, sex was all I thought about (besides drinking) 24/7.

A few days after the breakup I went to Florida to visit my mom and I saw my husband's cousin and her husband. I told her husband that I broke up with my husband and he started calling me all the time and acting very concerned. One drinking night I came out and asked him if he wanted to have sex with me and he said yes and then the conversations turned sexual - I am in NY and he is in FL so everything was on the phone. That happened on Saturday and then the Sunday I sent him 2 sexually explicit text messages and then some how I got out of my stupid fog and told him Monday morning that I am crazy and dont know what got into me to act that way.

He said he understood but he is keeping the text messages and I went into a panic begging him to delete it (I like his wife and he is family) so I did not want this to get out. Long story short- he never deleted it and I told him to stop calling me.

Now my husband and I are back together, but I am terrified of that coming out. My husband is not understanding at all and I KNOW FOR SURE he will not understand - even though he will be very shocked at what I did since that is not my personality at all. I am back to not wanting sex much and I dont know what got into me. I feel so ashamed at what I did and I cant get over it. Every time I think of it I feel like I am getting a panic attack and want to drink - even though this is what started it in the first place.

So far nothing came out so I guess he did not tell his wife and I cant even begin to confess this to my husband.

Sorry for the long post but I am feeling very depressed about it now and just wanted to share and find out what others think....trying not to take a drink tonight because of it.....it is so hard!

Thanks

[livedit]

my worst drinking experience

You were drunk.. he was sober.. big difference

[finallyfree]

my worst drinking experience

Thanks for the support, but I wasnt drunk when I sent the text messages, I knew what I was doing.

[~iirene~]

my worst drinking experience

well, your not finally-free of anything according to your story.
worst thing is, it's really hard.
texting is addictive, only 2 allow record keeping 2 be used after the fact!
be so careful.

[Zeppie2]

my worst drinking experience

Ask to borrow his phone and then drop it in the toilet

[Gold]

my worst drinking experience

Zeppie2;696106 wrote: Ask to borrow his phone and then drop it in the toilet

I like that :H

Seriously though, even if he showed people the text messages he can't prove that you actually sent them, and you don't know for sure whether he has kept the messages. He does not sound to be a terribly nice person, so think up a reason for him having these messages, someone else sent them, he took your phone and sent them to himself from your phone! You'll probably never need to use it but you'll feel better having a plan.

It's perfectly understandable to behave out of character when something major happens such as your breakup, please forgive yourself and do not allow your cousin's husband to exercise control over you.

[Tulipe]

my worst drinking experience

if your husband finds out, laugh it off like a joke, saying it was ridiculous, and that you would never have acted on such a thing. say it was just a dare to make yourself feel better after you split with your husband. Keep it light, not serious.

[brightlite]

my worst drinking experience

I wouldn't worry about it. I'm sure the cousins husband does not want his wife to find out and after time goes by, he will delete them...I'm sure of it. If the cousin does find out....Tulipe is right, just make light of it.

[joerindge]

my worst drinking experience

oh the horror of sent messages that you cant take back! Next time call instead

[sosad61]

my worst drinking experience

Gold;696205 wrote: I like that :H

Seriously though, even if he showed people the text messages he can't prove that you actually sent them, and you don't know for sure whether he has kept the messages. He does not sound to be a terribly nice person, so think up a reason for him having these messages, someone else sent them, he took your phone and sent them to himself from your phone! You'll probably never need to use it but you'll feel better having a plan.

It's perfectly understandable to behave out of character when something major happens such as your breakup, please forgive yourself and do not allow your cousin's husband to exercise control over you.

DITTO! You have nothing to worry about.

[Elpis]

my worst drinking experience

I know that this doesn't help the immediate problem but from my (a guy's) perspective, what would hack me off the most is not so much what you said to him but rather that you never said it to me!

E-

[nancy]

my worst drinking experience

I think you may be worrying over nothing. the cousin's husband would expose himself if he betrayed you. do you have copies of his texts? maybe you could let this guy know you have copies of his too.

As for your husband, I agree with the people who said you might be able to laugh it off. You could point out to him that he of all people knows how uninterested in sex you are and that was just a little flirtation when you were feeling bad about breaking up with him. No factual basis to it whatsoever.

Do you think you are not interested in sex generally or just not with him?