party at my house tonite

[looking for peace]

I am a bit anxious because my husband invited 4 couples to come over to our house for dinner tonite. I do not want to drink and will have to go t the liquor store later to stock up for the party. I don't plan to open anything until the party (maybe I should leave the serving strictly to him). We live in a new city and , other than Thanksgiving have not had a large group over yet.

My problem is that in the past when we have had alot of people over I get double anxiety. The anxiety that comes from needing to serve a great meal and the anxiety of being social once people are over. So I start early when preparing the house and the meal, and then keep up with he rest of the crowd during dinner. I am tired of barely remembering what went on at a party.

I think I have at least alleviated the house/meal issue since the cleaning lady happens to be coming today and the meal is very casual and I prepared most of it yesterday and just needs heating up. I just want to be able to handle the anxiety provoking time staring about 4:30 pm.

I did have a small dinner party at out last house during which I didn't drink at all and I really enjoyed myself. It was nice to really listen to people's stories and remember the details. Any suggestions???

[DeeBee]

party at my house tonite

Do you have any Kudzu or L-Glut you can take now and during the party?
What about planning your AF drinks? I quite liked the taste of our local AF beer and it's also filling so one would usually do the trick for me.... what time does everyone arrive?

[looking for peace]

party at my house tonite

Thanks for the reply, I do have kudzu and l-glut and have already taken some this morning (I plan to take it 3 times). People arrive at 7pm. Entertaining has never been my strong suit, makes me very nervous. Of course it turns out worse if I am drunk. I'm really overthinking this because I know if this was just a regular Friday night I'd be OK.

I really don't like the alcohol free beer. But I think I have had alcohol free wine in the past. I don't like the sweet stuff. Does anyone know of a decent AF wine that is in the dry side (white or red)?

[peacenik]

party at my house tonite

make some really yummy mocktails...who knows, maybe some of your guests don't want to drink either, and you'll be prepared!

[BPleasant]

party at my house tonite

There is a pretty good selection of AF wines, just ask at the store. Probably too late for this but a mock mulled wine for this time of year would be great, if you are in a colder area of the country that is.

[hippie37]

party at my house tonite

Hi Peace!

I'm a bit late to this thread so just wanted to say I hope everything went OK with your first dinner party at home.

Love and Light
Phil
xx

[cowgal]

party at my house tonite

me too

a little late, but hope the dinner party went well...................that is tough, but I had done it many times successfully in the past.

Best to you!:l:h

MA

[Doggygirl]

party at my house tonite

Looking for peace, I hope you had a nice time last night and that AL stayed off your back!

DG

[Eve11]

party at my house tonite

Please give us an update. How did things go? If they went well share your strategies with others.

I find that it works best if I don't have a drink until I sit down to eat and then I'll have a glass of wine with the dinner but I don't have the anxiety that many folks have that makes them want to have a drink early on.

A good trick in the future may be to have one good friend who comes early who can help with arrivals, etc. and that may reduce the stress you feel.

Let us know how it went as we all learn from each other.
:l
Eve11

[more2life]

party at my house tonite

Thinking of you tonight.

[looking for peace]

party at my house tonite

Thanks for all of the advice. I wound up buying a couple of AF beers, which I really didn't like. I live in Pennsylvania now which has really odd liquor/beer/wine policies. You have to get all 3 in 3 different locations. (So that stressed me out). I thought I could get AF wine at the wine and spirits store, turns out you can't... you have to go to the regular grocery store to get that. So, I didn't have time to get any. Long story short, I wound up drinking 3 big glasses of wine which bummed me out. (One was before people came over) Didn't want to come back to post about it, just got up the nerve today. I was too ashamed.

I was able to go AF before with people over... I just couldn't do it last week. I think my problem is trying to get rid of the anxiety beforehand. I'm really on edge trying to make sure everything is OK. If I'm really anxious about going out with other people to restaurants, I will have a drink or 2 beforehand. I just realized that it's my pattern and one that I want to break.

[mollyka]

party at my house tonite

Looking for Peace
Entertaining in my house was always my most stressful type of socialising, once I spent a whole week planning a dinner party and about 12 hours preparing and cooking and cleaning and ended up falling asleep at the table before we had dessert, I had to have God knows how many drinks before people arrived to calm down - what a waste!!!
Anyway LFP I have stopped socialising with anyone who drinks either in my house or out, I can't cope with it and what I am doing is far more important than upsetting people. Maybe in time I will be able to but not now.