This is a question that I have begun to ponder seriously and I think it is a very important fragment of the puzzle that must be solved before I can reach my goal. I actually have to give credit to Becca, who yesterday suggested that I try some supplements to stop the craving while I was dealing with my stressful day. It was a great suggestion, though I want to first see if I can do it on behavioral modification alone first. But her suggestion sparked a thought process for me. You see, I don't crave wine, don't particularly like the taste, never have withdrawal symptoms if I stop. So why do I drink wine. Becca's suggestion forced me to think about this question, and it is an important one.
Finally, I realized that I am not running to a bottle of wine. I am running to the opportunity to relax, to remove myself from the stress that surrounds my life. While conversing on this matter with my husband last night (over a glass of wine), he concurred with my thoughts. As he pointed out, I never just take a glass of wine. I will always say to him, "lets sit down, relax, and have a nice glass of wine". So, why wine? Well, I think it is because unlike other stress relieving activities, wine supports your mental desire for relaxation coupling it with physical relaxation brought about by the chemical reaction to the wine. Moreoever, once sipping the wine, unlike other activities, it has a tendency, at least for me, to remove my desire to get back to work, it has a tendency to make me forget the urgency of my other goals. All of the sudden, I don't care about what I have do. I'm relaxed and I want to keep drinking because I want to keep feeling that non-stress, relaxing feeling. I have this mindset that if I stop drinking I have to go back to work.
With this lesson learned, I am going to try a couple of experiments. But before I talk about my experiments, I should be honest and say that I had set today to be a reward day -- another words, I'm giving myself my new weekend drinking schedule; that is a glass at a lunch outing with my mom, a glass at cocktail hour as we will be joining dad for cocktail hour after our shopping spree, and a glass at dinner with my husband). I feel I deserve it and I'm going to reward myself. After all, I accomplished all my goals (on my one half bottle of wine!!!), but I didn't get to bed until after 1:00 p.m., got up at 4:30 a.m., and was at my son's school at 7:15 a.m., with cookies, drinks, and a costumed son with his essay papers in tow, after delivering all my work products late last night. My clients and associates are beaming, my son was sparkling, and all the kids once again thanked me for my dedication to them and the school. I feel like I deserve a special day and I'm taking it.
With that said, I have decided to experiment with other forms of relaxation. Today, I am going to find a bed, bath, & beyond. I am going to buy some bathing, "primping items" -- you know, for those of you old enough to remember, the "calgon take me away" kind of mentality. I'm going to start giving myself an hour a day for some kind of bathing aromatherapy sort of thing -- I don't know, I'll figure it out when I get to the store -- and no, I have no idea where I am going to find an hour in my day!!! I am on 24 hour call all the time. If the media tries to call, or a policymaker tries to reach me, I better be available. But I've started thinking about those old movies where they had a phone in the bathtub. I'm thinking of getting one. I'll see how this relaxation thing works first. In the meantime, I'll use the portable. I'm choosing bathing because, like wine, you can't just get up and walk away easily (for different reasons of course).
I also love music and use it alot to deal with how I feel on other things, so I'm going to look for some relaxation tapes while I'm out. I used to have one where you pretended to be on a beach -- it was great.
So, that is my challenge for the week; to find something that gives me a relaxation feeling for my stress. Lets see if it impacts my drinking desires. I'll keep you informed.
MM
Finally, I realized that I am not running to a bottle of wine. I am running to the opportunity to relax, to remove myself from the stress that surrounds my life. While conversing on this matter with my husband last night (over a glass of wine), he concurred with my thoughts. As he pointed out, I never just take a glass of wine. I will always say to him, "lets sit down, relax, and have a nice glass of wine". So, why wine? Well, I think it is because unlike other stress relieving activities, wine supports your mental desire for relaxation coupling it with physical relaxation brought about by the chemical reaction to the wine. Moreoever, once sipping the wine, unlike other activities, it has a tendency, at least for me, to remove my desire to get back to work, it has a tendency to make me forget the urgency of my other goals. All of the sudden, I don't care about what I have do. I'm relaxed and I want to keep drinking because I want to keep feeling that non-stress, relaxing feeling. I have this mindset that if I stop drinking I have to go back to work.
With this lesson learned, I am going to try a couple of experiments. But before I talk about my experiments, I should be honest and say that I had set today to be a reward day -- another words, I'm giving myself my new weekend drinking schedule; that is a glass at a lunch outing with my mom, a glass at cocktail hour as we will be joining dad for cocktail hour after our shopping spree, and a glass at dinner with my husband). I feel I deserve it and I'm going to reward myself. After all, I accomplished all my goals (on my one half bottle of wine!!!), but I didn't get to bed until after 1:00 p.m., got up at 4:30 a.m., and was at my son's school at 7:15 a.m., with cookies, drinks, and a costumed son with his essay papers in tow, after delivering all my work products late last night. My clients and associates are beaming, my son was sparkling, and all the kids once again thanked me for my dedication to them and the school. I feel like I deserve a special day and I'm taking it.
With that said, I have decided to experiment with other forms of relaxation. Today, I am going to find a bed, bath, & beyond. I am going to buy some bathing, "primping items" -- you know, for those of you old enough to remember, the "calgon take me away" kind of mentality. I'm going to start giving myself an hour a day for some kind of bathing aromatherapy sort of thing -- I don't know, I'll figure it out when I get to the store -- and no, I have no idea where I am going to find an hour in my day!!! I am on 24 hour call all the time. If the media tries to call, or a policymaker tries to reach me, I better be available. But I've started thinking about those old movies where they had a phone in the bathtub. I'm thinking of getting one. I'll see how this relaxation thing works first. In the meantime, I'll use the portable. I'm choosing bathing because, like wine, you can't just get up and walk away easily (for different reasons of course).
I also love music and use it alot to deal with how I feel on other things, so I'm going to look for some relaxation tapes while I'm out. I used to have one where you pretended to be on a beach -- it was great.
So, that is my challenge for the week; to find something that gives me a relaxation feeling for my stress. Lets see if it impacts my drinking desires. I'll keep you informed.
MM
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