You might be a redneck if....................
--You need more than one shopping cart at the thrift store.
--Nobody will sit next to you at Little League games.
--The "Elvis Theme" of your wedding ceremony wasn't intentional.
--You hold a yard sale after every baby shower.
--The only authority figure you respect is Captain Morgan.
--You've deliberately killed a bug with a bottle rocket.
--Your lips are moving as you're reading this.
--You only notice when the "check engine" light goes OFF.
--You think Xbox is where you keep your divorce papers.
--Starting your truck requires a big hill and a lot of luck.
--Your wedding ring changes colors when you're happy.
--You think 'My Space' is the La-Z-Boy next to the TV.
--Flushing your toilet requires both hands.
--You don't notice power outages.
--You've sent a fan letter to Chef Boyardee.
--You think a hybrid car is the half of a Camaro you welded to half a Pinto.
--You taped WWF wrestling over your wedding video.
--Door-to-door salesmen skip your door.
--There are always spent shotgun shell casings on your deck.
--Every time a car backfires you hit the deck.
--Your trailer park is home to at least one cult.
--Your kid's stuffed animals are REALLY stuffed animals.
--You've ever tried on a bra at a yard sale.
--You've demolished your kitchen to catch a rat.
--Your "deck" is an abandoned flatbed trailer next to your home.
--Your church was towed to its current location.
--Going swimming means damming the creek.
--Your underwear is edible but your cooking isn't.
--There's bumper stickers on your toilet.
--You only went down on one knee to propose because you were so drunk at the time.
--A NASCAR crash affects you more than a NASDAQ crash.
--Your shower cap is you regular cap.
--You've ever worn suit pants without a shirt.
--You need more than one shopping cart at the thrift store.
--Nobody will sit next to you at Little League games.
--The "Elvis Theme" of your wedding ceremony wasn't intentional.
--You hold a yard sale after every baby shower.
--The only authority figure you respect is Captain Morgan.
--You've deliberately killed a bug with a bottle rocket.
--Your lips are moving as you're reading this.
--You only notice when the "check engine" light goes OFF.
--You think Xbox is where you keep your divorce papers.
--Starting your truck requires a big hill and a lot of luck.
--Your wedding ring changes colors when you're happy.
--You think 'My Space' is the La-Z-Boy next to the TV.
--Flushing your toilet requires both hands.
--You don't notice power outages.
--You've sent a fan letter to Chef Boyardee.
--You think a hybrid car is the half of a Camaro you welded to half a Pinto.
--You taped WWF wrestling over your wedding video.
--Door-to-door salesmen skip your door.
--There are always spent shotgun shell casings on your deck.
--Every time a car backfires you hit the deck.
--Your trailer park is home to at least one cult.
--Your kid's stuffed animals are REALLY stuffed animals.
--You've ever tried on a bra at a yard sale.
--You've demolished your kitchen to catch a rat.
--Your "deck" is an abandoned flatbed trailer next to your home.
--Your church was towed to its current location.
--Going swimming means damming the creek.
--Your underwear is edible but your cooking isn't.
--There's bumper stickers on your toilet.
--You only went down on one knee to propose because you were so drunk at the time.
--A NASCAR crash affects you more than a NASDAQ crash.
--Your shower cap is you regular cap.
--You've ever worn suit pants without a shirt.
awprint: RUBY Imagine yourself doing What you love and loving What you do, Being happy From the inside Out, experiencing your Dreams wide awake,