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    May Modders

    I'm going to cut and paste my post that I just typed in the April thread, as I didn't realize today was May 1st!
    Sometimes what you're most afraid of doing is the very thing that will set you free.

    #2
    May Modders

    Good Sunday morning!
    Well, I'm still watching the wedding as I recorded it so I could take in all the commentators comments! I love learning all these little, sometimes useless facts. My brain craves that stuff! I've seen all of the biggest moments, but I want to see absolutely everything from beginning to end. Kate looked absolutely lovely. What a beautiful girl. And of course, William, handsome as ever!

    I have tried weight watchers, but not online. It's probably the best diet around as far as I'm concerned. You learn portion control and what to eat. I've got a weight watchers cook book and use it from time to time. You can't go wrong with that program.

    I stuck with my exercise routine this week. Today, I plan to get my cardio and toning videos in. I think sticking with that is the most important for me.

    Last night, my son had a birthday party to go to, as well as all of his friends, so we went to dinner with a few other parents. We stopped at a bar for a drink, then went to dinner. So I had three glasses of wine, and lots of food. I had planned AF, but I caved last night. I'm not feeling bad, though, as I didn't go overboard. And it was a nice evening with others. Talk to you soon!
    Sometimes what you're most afraid of doing is the very thing that will set you free.

    Comment


      #3
      May Modders

      This is my first post - just getting started on the modding. I successfully moderated for two years, but have had two relapses in the past month...the one on Friday night was a doozy and I am still ashamed and worried by it.

      I will be getting married in a couple of weeks and am determined to drink moderately at the wedding and thereafter as I begin a new and exciting phase in my life. My plan is to stay AF unless having wine at dinner. I have decided that hard liquor and beer no longer have a place in my life, so I am kissing them goodbye. I will miss the summer gin and tonics and the beers at the cafe on a crisp fall day, but I need to protect my future, and determined moderation is the only way to keep it on track. Wish me luck!

      Comment


        #4
        May Modders

        Hi east coast dave. Glad to have you on this thread. It takes commitment for us non-Normie drinkers to stay on track and there is a risk of slips just like anything in life. Change requires lots of work. Have you had a chance to familiarize yourself with a book called responsible drinking. Several of us here have the book and use it for the great tools and as a reminder of how important it is to refer to so that we can stay on top of things. Check it out and hope to be seeing more of you on this thread.
        Sometimes what you're most afraid of doing is the very thing that will set you free.

        Comment


          #5
          May Modders

          Hi folks.
          Did the same mistake so I will paste what I wrote a few minutes ago.
          Be strong-
          We define ourselves by the best that is in us, not the worse that has been done to us.
          Be constructive. Clear the word of CAN'T

          Comment


            #6
            May Modders

            Hi J-vo and Cher,

            I was planning on an AA meeting with a friend of mine last friday but she wanted to go to a home group one and I just didnt want to meet any of the people who go to that meeting.I know the memebers really well and I also know that they do not approve of the way I tackle my drinking issue.
            Anyway, in the end I did meet up with the group afterwards for "drinks" through gentle persuasion from my friend.
            In a nutshell the evening went okay until one of them asked me if I was still drinking. I said I was still successfully moderating and very happy with my progress.. in which one of them preceeded to give me a rather tedious lecture on how I cant possibly be.
            God he went on and on..reciting parts from the big book etc. Telling me that the only way is to abstain and go to AA meetings...blah blah bl...I will not suceed without AA..blah blah..I am in denial.. blah blah.

            Thankfully my friend stuck up for me and shut them all to shut up.

            Some people have become way too brainwashed by AA. It's their way or the highway. Utter rubbish! It's very clear that I cannot attend AA meetings when I am moderating. I will not have people telling me that I have failed before I have even tried.

            Otherwise, I had another lovely weekend. x
            Be strong-
            We define ourselves by the best that is in us, not the worse that has been done to us.
            Be constructive. Clear the word of CAN'T

            Comment


              #7
              May Modders

              j-vo,
              Glad that you dont feel bad. Your guilt is somthing positive and it's just keeping you on your toes. The fact that you had three glasses and didnt get hungover nor black out etc is a good thing.
              x
              Be strong-
              We define ourselves by the best that is in us, not the worse that has been done to us.
              Be constructive. Clear the word of CAN'T

              Comment


                #8
                May Modders

                Hi Eastcostdave,

                Two years is an amazing acheivement!It sounds like you know what you need to do next to stay on track. What kind of a drinker were you before you moderated?
                Be strong-
                We define ourselves by the best that is in us, not the worse that has been done to us.
                Be constructive. Clear the word of CAN'T

                Comment


                  #9
                  May Modders

                  Hi rebirth. Don't let that get you Dow. You certainly are not the one that is close-minded. I would not felt comfortable in that situation and prob. Said some things that I would have regretted. There are other ways to address drink problems and you know what is working for you. That's what's important. Have you checked out moderation management or any other programs that pride support? I don't know much about smart recovery but I think there are other face to face options. Just don't know if they are soles abstinent programs. Hang in there girlfriend. He was the one who stepped out of line and should be making amends to you!
                  Sometimes what you're most afraid of doing is the very thing that will set you free.

                  Comment


                    #10
                    May Modders

                    Hi j-vo,
                    I tried moderation management but didnt find it to be so user friendly.
                    I just feel sorry for this guy because he has made AA his only life and unfortunately it has alienated him from his own family. They are getting a divorce because he prefers to attend meetings five days a week rather than be with his wife and young children.I have been told that he has a reputation for picking up women at AA meetings.I have stopped questioning why he is so uptight. People are complicated.
                    But like you said, I know what works for me and I am confident that I can carry on drinking healthily.And thats what counts. I will admit that I do not know how I would react if I had to deal with a major trauma but I would still have those same doubts even if I was abstinent. It's all in the mind that works for me.

                    Anyway, I had a great workout on the treadmill today. My fitness level has really improved in three weeks. Was just thinking of the time last year when I had to have my glasses of wine every night. There was no way I could exercise!I was a proper drunk!Did you drink daily j-vo?

                    It's truely amazing how far I have come. I am always grateful for the new person I am.
                    Be strong-
                    We define ourselves by the best that is in us, not the worse that has been done to us.
                    Be constructive. Clear the word of CAN'T

                    Comment


                      #11
                      May Modders

                      Rebirth,
                      I met many people like that in AA. Both husband and wife either attended, or wife in Al-anon and hubby in AA, or singles in AA all the time. It certainly did not work for me as far as having family, working full time, a teenager in many sports...And I'm much happier working my "own" program. I'm glad you're ok.

                      And I'm so happy for you that you're feeling so great! That's so awesome. I, too, had a great workout yesterday and today. Did both toning and treadmill. I've been reading my nookbook as I walk my butt off. It works!

                      As far as my drinking, I was not a daily drinker, but I would say 4-5 days per week, which is way more than enough. It was mostly evening, unless it was a weekend, then the start would be around 3:00. Way too early, and too much. I was too tired to watch my shows, couldn't exercise as I'd wanted, got behind in everything...behind in life. I love to be productive. I was thinking that today. I love to be busy at work, productive, then also when I get home. Of course, when I get home, I good cup of coffee is a must, as I get up at 5:00 a.m. Then I can get through my night time routine. I'm a very routine person. How bout you?

                      I'm still watching the wedding, loving every minute, and now all the news on Osama Bin Laden. WOW. What a week.
                      Sometimes what you're most afraid of doing is the very thing that will set you free.

                      Comment


                        #12
                        May Modders

                        Hi everyone,

                        Welcome eastcoast dave. Good luck with your modding. Just make a plan and it is empowering. I know for me , it helps me to remember how good it feels to wake up every morning guilt free!!! shame free.
                        Rebirth... I felt that a lot of people in AA made that their life and more power to them if that is what they need at that time in their life.. but I like you have other things going too.
                        J-vo... our plans to be AF and then cave help remind me that I am NOT a normie. as a normie would not be thinking much of any of this issue we are dealing with. Good for you for staying at 3 glasses.

                        Great day that Bin Laden is off the radar finally!!!!
                        May our choices today not result in regret, but rather be wise

                        Comment


                          #13
                          May Modders

                          Hi Rebirth, J-Vo and Cherbear,

                          Thanks for the welcome and here's my brief drinking history:

                          Before I started modding I was more of a weekend warrior. I went to a work hard/play hard university, so I would spend Sunday-Thursday in the library, then hit the fraternity parties and bars throughout the weekend. I would usually get just a nice buzz, but started getting concerned at the occasional blackout. The same continued the first couple years after college. After two years in grad school, I decided to moderate due to another blackout, which I did successfully for over two years. I've had two blackouts in the last month, so it is time to really dedicate myself to moderation.

                          I'm at a point where I am very excited about my career and have wonderful relationships with those around me. I am enthralled at what moderation can do to assure that another blackout will not occur and endanger any of these growingly positive aspects of my life.

                          Comment


                            #14
                            May Modders

                            Good morning j-vo, cher and ecdave,

                            j-vo. Me too! I am a very routine person and I enjoy getting things done. Its quite shocking how I allowed myself to become a couch potato due to excess drinking. It's so opposite to who I am!I remember worrying about the spare time I would have if I stopped drinking..what would I do with myself? Ha! There is sooo much to do. I also use to think that I never had enough time because I was obviously too busy drinking it away. It just shows how cunning AL is so we always need to stay vigilant.

                            But isnt exercising great! And yes it's been an amazing week with the wedding and Osama. I didnt expect him to get caught ever.

                            Cher- How are the raspberry plants doing?

                            ECDave- Great attitude! Moderation is definitely possible for you so just stick to these threads. The more support the better I say. I use to drink a bottle of wine every night, then became a binge drinker on the weekends.I could not stop drinking. There was never enough AL for me. I drank to black out. I blacked out at least once a month. God what dark times they were. the chaos that came with it.Never again! You seem very young? How old are you?

                            Have a great tuesday all. The sun is out which makes me feel wonderful. x
                            Be strong-
                            We define ourselves by the best that is in us, not the worse that has been done to us.
                            Be constructive. Clear the word of CAN'T

                            Comment


                              #15
                              May Modders

                              Morning madders! Its early Tues. Morning and feeling great after workout yesterday. Im trying to get used to typing on my phone so sorry for lots of typos.
                              yes, Cher, I will never fall into the trap again thinking im a Normie. I was online last night looking up another book by Michael levy. Its a book for those that are looking to mod or abstain. I may order it as I think always reading about it will keep me on top of things, just like attending regular meetings. When people stop going to meetings they stop thinking how al got them into trouble.
                              eastcoast dave, sounds like you've caught your problem in the knick of time. You don't want to lose everything you have and al can certainly do that to a person.
                              keep up the good workouts rebirth! Im right with u!
                              Sometimes what you're most afraid of doing is the very thing that will set you free.

                              Comment

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