Good morning all,
Here in the UK the sky is very grey, it's raining quite heavily and the wind is blowing a gale, but I couldn't be more happy, and why?......Well today I have been AF for 73 days. ...To start with I counted each day, then I stopped that and just counted weeks, didn't bother to do that for the last few weeks, and when I thought about it today I realised just how long it had been, and you know what, when I was in the depths of my own hell of drinking, and there wasn't any alcohol in the house and I would panic and rush out to buy some I just never realised how much happier I could be without that poison in my system. WELL NOW I KNOW, AND THERE IS NO GOING BACK....
The reason I am posting this today is because on reading Neils post of yesterday I can relate to the cigarette thing.... About fifteen years ago I had a one hour session of hypnotherapy to help me stop smoking, at the time I was on about 25 a day, it worked, like magic the cravings went away. ...I would get the odd craving now and again, but nothing I couldn't deal with....Then four years later I was at my sisters wedding, after quite a few drinks at the reception I had such a massive craving for a cigarette that I quickly convinced myself that I could just have the one and I would be alright.....No of course not, I wouldn't start smoking again.....Stupid, within a matter of weeks I was back on 20 a day.....That went on for another four and a half years before I decided to try again to give up....I had another session of hypnotherapy and I haven't had a cigarette now for over seven years..
The same thing happened with drink...Last year, about this time, I managed, without any help at all, to stop drinking for four weeks....It wasn't as hard as I had feared and I felt fine.....At exactly the end of the fourth week, thinking to myself .....I can handle this now.....I decided to buy a bottle of wine to celebrate, you see my logic was, if I can go four weeks AF then surely I can just have the odd bottle now and again.
STUPID...STUPID....STUPID.....I felt as if I had given the enemy the slip and escaped from jail, only to be captured and imprisoned again.....It took me almost a year of drinking more and more heavily before I found the courage to try again...I remember I found MWO on Friday the 29th Sept when I was halfway through my third bottle of wine, when I switched on my computer the next morning there it was in my favourites. Needless to say I had no idea of what this MWO site was, so I clicked on it and as they say...the rest is history.
Right so the point of all this is.....you MUST be aware at all times of how quietly and insidiously the enemy will try and invade your brain. You must be prepared at all times to repel and overcome that sweet, silky voice which tells you....go on, it's ok, you can handle it now, one drink will be alright...Don't listen to it because that voice is the enemy.
As to Christmas, well like most of us on here I was looking forward to it and dreading it at the same time, because if anything is going to test me then Christmas day will......My daughter and son-in-law have just moved into their first house so Christmas day will be spent there...My daughter wanted to know if she should buy some alcohol free wine for me because as she put it.....you can't drink anymore.....but I said....it's not that I can't drink, I don't want to drink....Thinking about that remark later decided me on how I was going to handle Christmas.....The last 73 days have been the rehearsal and Christmas day is the opening of the show......It will also be a challenging battle with an old enemy but I know that enemy a whole lot better now and in a perverse kind of way I am looking forward to it because I intend to win
Well the rain has stopped so I think it's time for me to put on my walking boots and go and get some exercise.
Love to you all, just hope I haven't rambled on for too long,
Louise xxx :h
Here in the UK the sky is very grey, it's raining quite heavily and the wind is blowing a gale, but I couldn't be more happy, and why?......Well today I have been AF for 73 days. ...To start with I counted each day, then I stopped that and just counted weeks, didn't bother to do that for the last few weeks, and when I thought about it today I realised just how long it had been, and you know what, when I was in the depths of my own hell of drinking, and there wasn't any alcohol in the house and I would panic and rush out to buy some I just never realised how much happier I could be without that poison in my system. WELL NOW I KNOW, AND THERE IS NO GOING BACK....
The reason I am posting this today is because on reading Neils post of yesterday I can relate to the cigarette thing.... About fifteen years ago I had a one hour session of hypnotherapy to help me stop smoking, at the time I was on about 25 a day, it worked, like magic the cravings went away. ...I would get the odd craving now and again, but nothing I couldn't deal with....Then four years later I was at my sisters wedding, after quite a few drinks at the reception I had such a massive craving for a cigarette that I quickly convinced myself that I could just have the one and I would be alright.....No of course not, I wouldn't start smoking again.....Stupid, within a matter of weeks I was back on 20 a day.....That went on for another four and a half years before I decided to try again to give up....I had another session of hypnotherapy and I haven't had a cigarette now for over seven years..
The same thing happened with drink...Last year, about this time, I managed, without any help at all, to stop drinking for four weeks....It wasn't as hard as I had feared and I felt fine.....At exactly the end of the fourth week, thinking to myself .....I can handle this now.....I decided to buy a bottle of wine to celebrate, you see my logic was, if I can go four weeks AF then surely I can just have the odd bottle now and again.
STUPID...STUPID....STUPID.....I felt as if I had given the enemy the slip and escaped from jail, only to be captured and imprisoned again.....It took me almost a year of drinking more and more heavily before I found the courage to try again...I remember I found MWO on Friday the 29th Sept when I was halfway through my third bottle of wine, when I switched on my computer the next morning there it was in my favourites. Needless to say I had no idea of what this MWO site was, so I clicked on it and as they say...the rest is history.
Right so the point of all this is.....you MUST be aware at all times of how quietly and insidiously the enemy will try and invade your brain. You must be prepared at all times to repel and overcome that sweet, silky voice which tells you....go on, it's ok, you can handle it now, one drink will be alright...Don't listen to it because that voice is the enemy.
As to Christmas, well like most of us on here I was looking forward to it and dreading it at the same time, because if anything is going to test me then Christmas day will......My daughter and son-in-law have just moved into their first house so Christmas day will be spent there...My daughter wanted to know if she should buy some alcohol free wine for me because as she put it.....you can't drink anymore.....but I said....it's not that I can't drink, I don't want to drink....Thinking about that remark later decided me on how I was going to handle Christmas.....The last 73 days have been the rehearsal and Christmas day is the opening of the show......It will also be a challenging battle with an old enemy but I know that enemy a whole lot better now and in a perverse kind of way I am looking forward to it because I intend to win
Well the rain has stopped so I think it's time for me to put on my walking boots and go and get some exercise.
Love to you all, just hope I haven't rambled on for too long,
Louise xxx :h
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