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    swimming through spam

    Yikes I came on for some inspiration and it took me forever to wade through all the spam.
    I made it to day 10 (yesterday) but blew it last night. I'm back on track but having a hard time with the guilt. i could have hung on but I made a conscious choice that's the part that's tough to get over. self sabotage.

    #2
    swimming through spam

    Hi there - first of all, let go of the guilt - it doesn't do you any good. what is done is done. now you need to work out why you caved and that way, when you get to that point (if you do) NEXT time, you won't do it again. What happened that made you give in? Was it a conscious decision? And if so, why? Did you have a plan in place? I could not be doing this without a plan - covering all eventualities!

    Please let the guilt go - you cannot change the past - just ensure it doesn't happen again - hugs to you and good for you being back on track......

    Sun
    How simple it is to see that we can only be happy now and there will never be a time when it is not now....

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      #3
      swimming through spam

      I agree. And if you let us know what your plan is it will seem more real to you, and you're more likely to put it into place when the time comes that you need it....just a thought.
      Ask yourselves, would you rather be a non drinker with an occasional desire to drink or a drinker with a constant desire to stop doing it?
      (quote from Bean )

      Goal: Survival

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        #4
        swimming through spam

        Yes I did it on purpose. I know that its an all or nothing thing, there is no "just on the weekends" but...I figured i'll give it a try and see how I do. My plan was 2 at dinner (we went out) then i'd come home and read. Well after 2 i got home and remembered there was a few inches left in a bottle and i went right for it. So now there is nothing in the house, I've proved to myself that there is no "sometimes" for me and my husband has been put on patrol to gently remind me of last night should i try and do that again. Like you said i have to move on. I just hate that I can't say day 11, i have to say day 1 all over again. 10 was the farthest i'd ever made it. I was also dieting along with going AF so it was a double failure there because after some drinks you don't mind eating a piece of cake bigger than your head.

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          #5
          swimming through spam

          I found out the last time I quit, that there is no modding for me. this time I will NOT drink again. I know that if I 'allow' myself one, the next night it will be two....and so on. And I will be back at day 1 again. So, you just need to change your mindset and decide if it really is going to be this time..... did you just want to quit or did you want to mod? Some here say that before you try to mod you have to have at least 30 days AF under your belt before you should even try to mod. So at least see if you can get to the 30 day AF mark - lots of threads going on right now with people quitting - join in one - it helps so much to come on and post that you are another day AF.

          hang in there!

          sun
          How simple it is to see that we can only be happy now and there will never be a time when it is not now....

          Comment


            #6
            swimming through spam

            Anon, there's always something in our path. It has to be in US to resist, and it's so hard. Hang in there, and keep posting.
            sigpic
            Never look down on a person unless you are offering them a hand up.
            awprint: RUBY Imagine yourself doing What you love and loving What you do, Being happy From the inside Out, experiencing your Dreams wide awake, Being creative, being Unique, being you - changing things to the way YOU know they can BE - Living the Life you Always imagined.awprint:

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              #7
              swimming through spam

              Anon, ur doing well, it was just a realisation that moderating isnt for u , u coming back to the abstainers?
              i think 10 days is grand, and u can achieve more than this now u know that moderating isnt 4 u
              I love people who make me laugh. I honestly think it's the thing I like most, to laugh. It cures a multitude of ills. It's probably the most important thing in a person.
              Audrey Hepburn

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                #8
                swimming through spam

                Good for you for jumping right in. At least now you know that you can't drink at all. For me I know that I can't drink. If I have 1 I will want to have more, and god only knows if I would be able to jump right back in, or be too ashamed to do it right away and then how long would it take me to try again? I rather not see so I just won't drink. You can do this! Learn from your mistakes and don't repeat them. And lose the guilt, what happened, happened and there is nothing that you can do to change the past. Just work to make sure that you don't drink again.
                I quit drinking on March 8, 2020. Taking it One Day At A Time and no more taking my quit for granted.

                Also doing it for me. I got to stay sober for me.

                Just consecrate on today and do what you can to remain sober for today and worry about staying sober tomorrow, tomorrow.

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                  #9
                  swimming through spam

                  Thanks guys. I'm over the guilt. That day after is always the worst. I'm back on track today guilt free and moving ahead. Rather than calling it day one i've decided to go with 11 1/2

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