Goodmorning All,
Day 16AF,
I hope you all have had a lovely weekend and continue to have a beautiful day.
I am doing good this weekend, No problems..and I am happy to say the AF thing is not wieghing heavily on my mind this weekend, and I am finding it easier and easier as the time passes.
I had gotten more into a mental habit than a physical one, and i had just sort of...gotten used to my routine..you know...so now I am getting used to a knew routine.
I had gotten used to stopping at the store everynight for the past couple of years, somethign I have not done now for the 16 days, with of course, the exception, of buying groceries...and I am starting to accept the reality of my new routine.
When I wake up, I know what i will do in the evening now, and to be honest, it is kind of a relief..i was so scared before because i would be drunk by 7pm, and i would always tell myself i wouldnt answer the phone, but by the time i was drunk, i had forgotten, and would always answer, then in the morning I would wake up, see the phone beside me, and my heart would sink, I would think "oh God, what did I do this time"...now when i wake I know exactly what i did the night before, the week before, if someone called me at midnight with a question about something, I remember that!!!!!
I guess my point is...it may be hard at times...but the first couple of days were my hardest, since then, i have found a method, when I find a moment, where i think i could just go back to the way i was, i remember the way i felt in those moment i described in the paragraph above, and the feeling is gone...gone....I am just happy to not be locked up in my home by this anymore!!!!
Thanks for listening
Victoria
Day 16AF,
I hope you all have had a lovely weekend and continue to have a beautiful day.
I am doing good this weekend, No problems..and I am happy to say the AF thing is not wieghing heavily on my mind this weekend, and I am finding it easier and easier as the time passes.
I had gotten more into a mental habit than a physical one, and i had just sort of...gotten used to my routine..you know...so now I am getting used to a knew routine.
I had gotten used to stopping at the store everynight for the past couple of years, somethign I have not done now for the 16 days, with of course, the exception, of buying groceries...and I am starting to accept the reality of my new routine.
When I wake up, I know what i will do in the evening now, and to be honest, it is kind of a relief..i was so scared before because i would be drunk by 7pm, and i would always tell myself i wouldnt answer the phone, but by the time i was drunk, i had forgotten, and would always answer, then in the morning I would wake up, see the phone beside me, and my heart would sink, I would think "oh God, what did I do this time"...now when i wake I know exactly what i did the night before, the week before, if someone called me at midnight with a question about something, I remember that!!!!!
I guess my point is...it may be hard at times...but the first couple of days were my hardest, since then, i have found a method, when I find a moment, where i think i could just go back to the way i was, i remember the way i felt in those moment i described in the paragraph above, and the feeling is gone...gone....I am just happy to not be locked up in my home by this anymore!!!!
Thanks for listening
Victoria
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