Hey Dudes! I'm back! After much discussion with my buddy Kat, I've decided to get back to being a "good boy".
First of all, 'Happy Easter"!
So, what has happened to IJM the past few months? Well let me bring you up to date. I went a full 6 months AF. I was doing great. Then I had a major hit. My best fried of many years and I had a parting of the ways. Her office is right next to mine and we see each other every day. We have not spoken since the first week of February. I'll save you all the gory details but to put it in perspective, this was my best friend ever. Her and her husband, Mrs. IJM and I did everything together. Together almost every weekend. We all went on a ski trip in January together. She and I have lunch every day together. Text every evening. She knew everything about me. Well, it ended by her sending me an email with stuff in it you just can't take back ? ever. I took the high road and didn't fight back ? I think this was part of the problem. I didn't have a proper closure. And I have never let anyone get the best of me. Well when this ended I went into a state of depression of biblical proportions. I pretty much let myself go. Piano lessons ended, a quit going to the gym, I just puttered around at work. And I turned to my old friend who swore he would never leave me ? AL. I said I was not going back to where I was so I didn't go back to rum. I just started drinking wine. A glass or 2 a night. Now I am at a bottle a night. I'm back to little memory of the previous evening. My weight is up. And I really just don't feel good about myself at all.
So I got up this beautiful Easter morning, hung over and feeling like crap and decided this is crazy. I'm freaking 47 years old and I feel like I'm 80. I'm not comfortable in my skin and am just generally watching life go by. So, I am putting the brakes on this situation right freaking now! I did it before and I can do it again. I have to crawl out of this funk and depression and start living again.
You know, it's amazing the kind of affect that you can let a person have on you. Other than my lovely bride, I do not think I will ever let anyone get that close to me again. It's too freaking painful and the damage it can do is beyond words.
So, I told Al to get out of my life once again. I am going to need to lean on my pals at MWO for a while until I can get this back on my own two feet.
Sorry for all the drama that I brought into this but I did want you to know where I've been and what my plans are for the future.
Take care and I hope to be talking to you all on a more regular basis. This is Day 1 for me! (shit, starting over sucks the big one!!!)
IJM
P.S. I can't end an IMJ post without one of my provocative thoughts of the day?. If a bunch of midgets do the wave, Is it a ripple?
First of all, 'Happy Easter"!
So, what has happened to IJM the past few months? Well let me bring you up to date. I went a full 6 months AF. I was doing great. Then I had a major hit. My best fried of many years and I had a parting of the ways. Her office is right next to mine and we see each other every day. We have not spoken since the first week of February. I'll save you all the gory details but to put it in perspective, this was my best friend ever. Her and her husband, Mrs. IJM and I did everything together. Together almost every weekend. We all went on a ski trip in January together. She and I have lunch every day together. Text every evening. She knew everything about me. Well, it ended by her sending me an email with stuff in it you just can't take back ? ever. I took the high road and didn't fight back ? I think this was part of the problem. I didn't have a proper closure. And I have never let anyone get the best of me. Well when this ended I went into a state of depression of biblical proportions. I pretty much let myself go. Piano lessons ended, a quit going to the gym, I just puttered around at work. And I turned to my old friend who swore he would never leave me ? AL. I said I was not going back to where I was so I didn't go back to rum. I just started drinking wine. A glass or 2 a night. Now I am at a bottle a night. I'm back to little memory of the previous evening. My weight is up. And I really just don't feel good about myself at all.
So I got up this beautiful Easter morning, hung over and feeling like crap and decided this is crazy. I'm freaking 47 years old and I feel like I'm 80. I'm not comfortable in my skin and am just generally watching life go by. So, I am putting the brakes on this situation right freaking now! I did it before and I can do it again. I have to crawl out of this funk and depression and start living again.
You know, it's amazing the kind of affect that you can let a person have on you. Other than my lovely bride, I do not think I will ever let anyone get that close to me again. It's too freaking painful and the damage it can do is beyond words.
So, I told Al to get out of my life once again. I am going to need to lean on my pals at MWO for a while until I can get this back on my own two feet.
Sorry for all the drama that I brought into this but I did want you to know where I've been and what my plans are for the future.
Take care and I hope to be talking to you all on a more regular basis. This is Day 1 for me! (shit, starting over sucks the big one!!!)
IJM
P.S. I can't end an IMJ post without one of my provocative thoughts of the day?. If a bunch of midgets do the wave, Is it a ripple?
ray:
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