AF Daily~Wednesday, August 22

[ThreeDogNight]

Good morning, Abbers!
Filling in for Mick here today, so coffee is ready! I need it today--still feeling tired and have a dull headache off and on. Day 13, but guess it could be PAWS. Still feels a whole lot better than a hangover!
I was so happy to see GarlicMan Det back! I was lucky that I didn't have a hard time getting off Paxil a couple of months ago, but I'd only taken it for about four months and was on a pretty low dose. And I weaned off as slowly as I could, even though my doctor told me I could just stop. So I do think that you are wise to just stick with them if you felt like such a zombie. Sure is great that you didn't pick up a drink, though! I love your posts, so keep 'em coming!
SunFlower--sending extra:l to you today! PLease check in here.
PQ--how are you today? Getting meetings in? I still get the Grapevine online--forget just how much it costs--something like $27 a year. I try to read the stories for inspiration. I will need to get meetings in as part of my DUI requirements. I did keep a list of them for a few months in the winter, but stopped doing that.
Had an absolutely beautiful day yesterday! We took a ride around the Lake--hadn't done that in a long time--and went to a supermarket that is much better than anything we have right here. And were able to get a boat ride late afternoon when there was very little boat traffic and it was perfect weather. Only problem is the boat-it is almost as old as I am:H, has a problem with overheating and I could smell smoke. Happened last time, too, and Mr TDN put some sealant on the pipes, and he was sure that it was burning off and caused the smell. But we took it very easy and didn't go far. I used to drive home--it's under a mile to the dock--while Nr TDN covered the boat, and would then go back an pick him up. Can't even drive down the road. But I also know that I used that time to sneak a drink. Still could have done it, as Mr TDN had to take me home and then go back, but I realized what sick behavior that was. And most of my boating time was "cocktail" hour time. Glad it's over!
It is another beautiful day starting--the sunlight is so pretty at 6:00 a.m. Walking, then work at 9:30. Short day, as I finish at 3:00. Lots of work tagging all the slae things that came while I was off yesterday. Big sale is Friday and Saturday.
Lav, Turn, DG, YahYah, Lilly, Liife, Shue, Kas, Pap3 and eeryone I am forgetting--have a great AF day!
TDN

[Lavande]

AF Daily~Wednesday, August 22

Good morning Abbers & happy hump day to all!!

Thanks for starting us up TDN
I hope Mick is being kind to his toe today while hiking!

Welcome back Det, you were missed
I have also learned that I am another one who needs a little help in the mood department. I have been taking my OTC product for the past 3.5 years & will stay with it probably forever.

I'm off to pick up my grandaughter for the day - fun times
Wishing everyone a terrific AF Wednesday!
Lav

[Doggygirl]

AF Daily~Wednesday, August 22

fABbies!!!

Sorry I was MIA yesterday. Some days are like that ? just can?t get here every day. Hope that?s OK! For those of you just getting started on your journies, please have faith and hope and trust that life WILL get better and become full again. I remember how dark and lonely and hopeless it felt during that time when I finally realized I just HAD to stop the madness, but fighting the cravings and relapses and repeated Day 1?s in order to get there. It?s worth it!!!

I was one to just disappear from here when I could string more than a couple AF days together. I know that my unwillingness to talk openly about my failures, and to ask for help held me back. When I first got here I managed to go 60 days AF with the help of the forum & book recommendations. (exercise, diet, supplements for me) Then I decided I could drink again. ( :H:H) I would have to go back and look but that 8 month or so period of return to hell was largely one of hiding for me. Looking back, I know that I extended my hell by not just sticking with it and staying here day after day.

FWIW!

PQ ? so glad to see you posting every day! I hope you are feeling good.

Lav ? I remember when my Grandad passed away (in his early 60?s from cancer) and not too long after, Grandma had herself a boyfriend. When Grandpa was so sick for so long she worked tirelessly to take care of him. When I asked her if she and the new BF would get married one day she said ?NO WAY!!! I took care of one sick old man in my life and I?m not taking care of another one some day.? :H So she enjoyed his company and then sent him home. See? You could do that if you kick YB to the curb. F the FF and his secretive ways! I love the idea of your trained chicken pecking his tires. Also love Shue?s suggestion about finding yourself a hot young golf pro. Nothing wrong with a few afternoon golf lessons, right? Then you would have your own secret? :H

Mick ? sounds like you are doing better than me on the technology front!

Destiniey ? CONGRATS ON 31 DAYS!!! Sorry I missed your party yesterday!

Turnagain ? Wow that pic in your avatar is fabulous!

Sausage! Congrats on 181!!! That is fABulous! Today you break new ground!

CanToo ? sounds like a wonderful time in the Rockies. Wow.

Det ? I am SO GLAD to see you. Anti-D meds are LIFE SAVING for those who truly need them. Take your miracle my friend, and live your life to the fullest, enjoying garlic every step of the way. :l

TDN ? I like the Grapevine too. Thanks for starting us today!

Hello to all fABBies not mentioned above! Love you all.

I'm like a little kid with my stuff all packed up and my outfit picked out for first day of school. And I don't leave until 1pm LOL! Can't wait.

I love that we have such a wide range of people on this thread in terms of geography, men and women, and where we are on the path to sobriety. I find it enriching to interact with everyone embracing our similarities as well as our differences! There are two things we all have in common it seems.

1. A desire to stop drinking and
2. Our age. (29)

Well, I'm going to push the go button and find out how far over the blasted smilie limit I am!

One thing is for sure....no AL for me today! Too much livin' to do.

DG

[ThreeDogNight]

AF Daily~Wednesday, August 22

Just wanted to say "Enjoy your first day of school," DG!!! So cute--picking out the outifit and all! I did that every year when teaching I hope your courses will be interesting and informative this semester. Do you get the Addiction Professional magazine? Picked one up when I was doing the Impaired Driver course. Really good articles. Think you can get the digital version, too.
Let us know how the first day goes!
And yes, I am 29 forever!:H LOL!!!

[porqoui]

AF Daily~Wednesday, August 22

Morning TDN, Lav and all to come.
My depression seems to have gone looking for the AL it can't find here. :H
Had a meeting with my very busy lawyer (waiting on her return calls is torture) last night and we are now in full blown litigation mode. We have are plan in place and my homework includes a chronological "list" of events showing why the appointed Power of Attorney is incapable of managing my father's estate and is making illogical decisions in his health care. She is basically running my Dad's estate in a monthly deficeit of $6,000. To cover the difference she keeps cashing GIC"s. It's funny how all this bullshit was my reason for my slip and now I feel even stronger in my ability to cope with this and follow it through. Estimated date of trial is sometime in November and I'm ok with that. Sorry to ramble on but I this is a big breakthrough for me. Hi to DG just saw you posted so will go and read it. Have a great AF day all. PQ

[Destiniey]

AF Daily~Wednesday, August 22

Good morning everyone! Thanks for the coffee TDN.......it was much needed today!!!!!

Thanks to everyone for my well wishes on reaching 30 days! It is so exciting and I can't wait to go to my AA meeting and be able to get my chip!!!!!

This is just a quick "hello" before I take my shower and head out to work! Have a great AF wednesday to everyone!!!!!

[porqoui]

AF Daily~Wednesday, August 22

DG Got to ask. What is FWIW!?

[Doggygirl]

AF Daily~Wednesday, August 22

porqoui;1367492 wrote: DG Got to ask. What is FWIW!?

For Whatever It's Worth. (probably not much LOL!)

So glad to hear you are turning around this energy from wanting to drink into wanting to WIN!!! That determined Lav-attitude will "make things better" in a way that AL never, ever will.

Destiniey - wish I could be there at the meeting when you get your chip! I love those celebrations!

TDN - I don't get the print magazine but I am subscribed to the web site and get notices every time they post a new article. I LOVE that web site. Very updated stuff - newer things in addiction treatment rather than the same ol' same ol'.

DG

[Kaslo]

AF Daily~Wednesday, August 22

Hi everyone, its a grey cool early fallish day in KasloLand, and I LOVE IT! Ima get out there and make a nuisance of myself asap. However first thanks to TDN for launching us on Das Boot SS MWO this morning. I love being on the water too. So much better sober however. The Columbia here is still ripping, trees that were flooded on either side bent over and its still very high. Yesterday I read about volumes of water in cubic meters per second flows and its just scary.

Destiniey, have a great day, you deserve to be pumped up. Congrats again.

PQ you should be VERY proud of yourself, you have gotten it together to kick some serious butt in November. Believe me, I noticed a huge difference in myself after about 3 months, I was much more copis mentis, you know? Your dad is very lucky to have you working on his behalf.

DoggieGirl, I got a real charge out of your spiderman lunch box idea. Wish I was savy enough on the internet to swipe a photo of one and post it here for you. Good luck on day one. I too loved days one in school. So much fun, and no work YET!

Lav, enjoy your day. I have to tell you that after yesterdays work, when I went through the books as I do in August most years I discovered that yet again, I have paid for about 3/4 of the expenses and I mean ALL of them. And I do pretty much ALL of the household maintenance, cooking and cleaning. And Mr. Kaslo (who I still love and enjoy the company of when he is "present") comes home from the job he loves, eats without speaking to me, then lays on the couch with his ipad and earphones on and watches his fav tv programs, and I do what ever it is I do. I could and have played music really loud, shouted to see if he can hear me, what ever, he is off in Breaking Bad land or whereever. He will take a series and watch 4 episodes in a row, every night. I used to drink during this, but now its usually sewing or writing or drawing or reading or posting on this website. And thats fine, but I am also thinking I will check out the realestate options, and sell the house, divide it up and go out to live somewhere where there are theatres, bookstores, music, cafes etc, Because I am so frickin tired of working my tail off for nothing, I might as well be alone. And believe me folks I have tried discussing this with Mr Kaslo, but hes past 29, (lol!) and I cant change him. He just doesnt get it. And also, to be fair, there is NOTHING to do here in the evenings in this little one horse town in the evenings. Lovely guy, but boring as baked salt.

So thats my story.

Now Im off to prepare for the hearing in September. Big shout out to Shu, Pap3, Greenie where are YOU now, M3, Life, Lilly, and Det, so glad you are feeling better and back among the land of the living. Depression is horrible, I know. It may take a bit longer for you to take these drugs. I took paxil for about 4 years, and my depression only started to increase when I was drinking too much 10 years ago. Now, I cant seem to work up a good depressed state, its just not there any more. Thank goodness.

One thing is for sure....

[shueaddict]

AF Daily~Wednesday, August 22

Hola, fabberdabbers,

For my next holiday I am going on a no booze cruise (Turn got that idea) - somewhere in the middle of the ocean on a ship with no stinkin' AL in sight.

Ok, it is not sooo bad, I had the best humpday ever - bike ride and swim in the morning, spa in the afternoon, dinner at a Greek restaurant. Hubby ordered a small ouzo ( big step from the little bottles we used to share, i.e." I used to hog"). I could smell it from the terrace, before the waitress even came. Another conditioning for me to break - ouzo meant holiday, Greek holiday. I swallowed hard. He has not offered me any after badgering him the night before.

I find I am eating more, still healthy stuff, but I reward myself with food rather than AL. I feel like I am back to the early days of AL avoidance but I am determined to make these 2 weeks of hols AF.

[Lavande]

AF Daily~Wednesday, August 22

Nothing wrong with some healthy treats shue

Here ya go DG:



Kaslo - you are thinking more like me where peace of mind is valuable real estate :H
I need to be around people who love me & don't judge me. I have a few old work friends but mostly it's the grandkids that fit the bill
I don't need or want any more men in my life - done!

My grandaughter is here with me today & she is a completely different animal from the grandsons I watched yesterday - thank goodness :H
Having fun just hanging out

[porqoui]

AF Daily~Wednesday, August 22

Kaslo, thank you for those kind words. It has been a fab day for me. Oh yeah, my ex and Mr K could be twins except instead of watching taped episodes he would play online poker, because it's his money and he can do whatever he wants. What a dork! PQ

[Kaslo]

AF Daily~Wednesday, August 22

Shue you rule. That is ALL. Keep it up, and give the DH a rap upside the head if waves it under your nose.

Lav, I often consider moving to be closer to my gks, but I never know where my daughter is going to pop up next. My eldest grandaughter is only 3 and she has been moved 6 times in four different cities. Each of them several hundred miles apart. So If I do pull up, it will be to move somewhere I want to go. I already have a place in mind. I AM checking the realestate.

Porqoui, you are welcome. And YES PQ, whats with that re X-Mr PQ? They really don't get the share concept. Whats his is his, but whats mine (in the Dollar Dept) is his too. In fact, when I was helping our oldest daughter too much financially in his opinion, (she was married to a deadbeat, go figure), he complained bitterly because he was worried it would not leave enough for HIM.

This house is my retirement fund, but when I sell, I bet Mr Kaslo will expect half, even though he has not in any way contributed half. Oh well. At least I still LIKE him.

Lol!

kas

[Determinator]

AF Daily~Wednesday, August 22

TDN, sorry to correct you that I did in fact drink after over a year AF. detoxing today and very shaky. just not a fun roller coaster ride but I'm pointed the right way at least. hope to be back in good humor in a few days.
congrats to Distiniey on the big 30

be well everyone

[LillyE]

AF Daily~Wednesday, August 22

Hello my lovely MWO friends,

So much to catch up on and I feel out of the loop… Mick, thankfully no, no wine has been murdered in the production of this trying week. And, while I have had fleeting thoughts of alcohol as a stress relief mostly I have been thinking about how much easier it is to deal with life AF. I've had days I've done things I couldn't have if I were drinking and it makes you realize how alcohol as a stress relief only works temporarily - then adds extra stress.

Mick, when you read this, how was the trip? And we are so close to 60 - one week today! I'm going to treat myself to a great new haircut. How about you? A new toe perhaps?

DEST - a belated HUGE CONGRAULATIONS ON 30 DAYS. WHOOWHOOWHOO. I know full well what a huge deal that is, especially when it's been awhile to get there. Now keep it going! I'm on Day 53 and it's funny how the last 23 have flown compared to the first 30. It's still a big effort but it really is getting easier and better.

Having said that, I've been on a bit of an emotional roller coaster. Can't really tease out how much is just life, how much might be PAWS (still unclear how heavy a drinker you have to have been to really get this) and how much is that I've been weaning myself off the antidepressants meant to help with my anxiety. I'm on such a low dose (just 10mg Lexapro a day) and I wanted to get off it a) because I think it's contributed to the weight gain over the last year and b) I'm not sure it's done all that much for me anyway and c) I'm sick of medicating myself. Having said that, I've had some major anxiety attacks of late - not just since I cut back to 5mg however - so perhaps this is foolish. I may see how I go for a bit longer though.

On the weight front though, I've lost 4 kilos now. When I got back from holiday in June I set a goal of losing 5-6 to get back to where I want to be so I'm getting close.

Doggy, hope you had a great first day at school

Porquoi, you are sounding so much better!!! I am quite sure that being AF makes you far more effective dealing with all the legal stress. Alcohol would do nothing but temporarily distract and then you've be back where you were with alcohol stress/sadness/depression added on top. So good on you. You're doing great.

Shue you are also doing great. Enjoy the food treats - you're on holiday! You deserve them and they won't kill you and if they help you get through AF then, well, fabulous.

Welcome back Det - glad to have you among us. Sorry to hear about the reason though. I hope you're doing ok - detoxing is no fun at all. What happened to lead you back to the bottle after a year?

Speaking of relapses, and Shue this might help you right now too, there's currently a great thread in General about them for anyone toying with the idea of a drink. I know it helped remind me why I don't want to go there. See 'Going out and coming back in again'.

Life, where are you? I hope you are ok??

More food for thought today:
How Much is Your Alcoholism Really Costing You?