Good morning, good evening and welcome.........and how are we all today?
Weather over here is getting warmer..but windier and wetter..........soinds like a curry night!!!!:H
Well all the news is full of Margaret Thatchers passing....that has certainly incited some comment..both good and bad world wide..have seen some very derogatory comments ffs...comparisons to Hitler and things like that!!!!
My political and religious beliefs are mine and thats how they shall stay,only thing I will say is no matter what you thought of her or her policies, she had the courage and guts to see them through in an ever changing world...even her opponents have said that..cant see much courage and balls in any of the parties today..theyre all too busy trying to sort get out of jail free cards after being caught at expenses,subsidies,free holidays and the like!!:H
Movin on..tea and coffee are on the go..Im on cup number 2 now
Mornin TT...hows Brizzel today?trying to work out..did you emigrate? seem to know people all over the place!lad youre feeling a wee bit better today,,yep you are right you dont need drink to do any of those things, they happen any way, but not being kayleyed makes it easier to deal with them...Enjoy your time in Bristol
Morning Lav..one large cuppa madam.And how are you today?after your babysitting..as for gardening..yep maybe Im a wee bit early but its started .Spuds are in under a frost blanket, 3 different lots of strawberries, cabbage, carrots broccoli, beetroot, lettuce, radish, rhubarb, peppers ,toms, herbs, broad beans and garlic..all under polythene ..not that brave to take the covers off yet!!
As for twains...yep house this for sad..Thomas the tank names off the top of my head
Thomas, Percy Henry Edward Terence Dennis Clarabelle Anna Bertie.....how old am I ??:H
Have a great day
Morning YAH...lots of ouches...but not once did you mention al...well done you :wd:take your time it will be worth it
Hiya ppqp....one of those cooried up days hope you are ok..much as I would like to help you with the snow...eh no thanks!!!!..3Cs couch cuppa cooried!!!have a good one
Morning Kuya..how are you today ?tired I guess..and got to work too? jeez best of luck!!
As for the statement I dont have to do anything I dont want to .......hmm not quite true believe you me!!lets just leave that one...next!!Take it you havent been swimming recently..is it too cold over there now for any of that?Know youre at work ,but have a good day
Mornin SL...how are you? Nearly Wednesday..no more on call..then only 4 days off call? that isnt much of a level playing field!!!Dont mind me asking ..what is it you do?If you do just ignore
just seems a wee bit unfair those sort of odds! Any plans for your off time?
Remember tomorrow when you get that aagh thats it over feeling the little voice doesnt try and tempt you with a celebratory drink..but Im sure your strong enough to tell it to bugger off!!
Morning Cat and how are you today?Good for you on the apple eating..I love them too ..specially the little ones.Moods and tempers do change ..there are never 2 the same..as for the conference call..maybe was the right thing..after all why get wound up over someone yakking down a piece of plastic!!
Well done on the sleep issue...now you need to get some more!!..and the positive note..look forward to see surviving being replace by improving
Right ho ..its time to go.........sheer poetry!!!! big shout to the missing throng wherever you are stay safe and sober
Everybody I know who has a dog usually calls him "Rover" or "Spot". I call mine Sex. Now, Sex has been very embarrassing to me. When I went to the City Hall to renew the dog's license, I told the clerk that I would like a license for Sex. He said, "I would like to have one too!" Then I said, "But she is a dog!" He said he didn't care what she looked like. I said, "You don't understand. ... I have had Sex since I was nine years old." He replied, "You must have been quite a strong boy." When I decided to get married, I told the minister that I would like to have Sex at the wedding.He told me to wait until after the wedding was over. I said, "But Sex has played a big part in my life and my whole world revolves around Sex." He said he didn't want to hear about my personal life and would not marry us in his church. I told him everyone would enjoy having Sex at the wedding. The next day we were married at the Justice of the Peace. My family was barred from the church from then on. When my wife and I went on our honeymoon, I took the dog with me. When we checked into the motel, I told the clerk that I wanted a room for me and my wife and a special room for Sex. He said that every room in the motel is a place for sex. I said, "You don't understand. ... Sex keeps me awake at night." The clerk said, "Me too!" One day I entered Sex in a contest. But before the competition began, the dog ran away. Another contestant asked me why I was just looking around. I told him that I was going to have Sex in the contest. He said that I should have sold my own tickets. "You don't understand," I said, "I hoped to have Sex on TV." He called me a show off. When my wife and I separated, we went to court to fight for custody of the dog. I said, "Your Honor, I had Sex before I was married but Sex left me after I was married." The Judge said, "Me too!" Last night Sex ran off again. I spent hours looking all over for her. A cop came over and asked me what I was doing in the alley at 4 o'clock in the morning. I said, "I'm looking for Sex." -- My case comes up next Thursday. Well now I've been thrown in jail, been divorced and had more damn troubles with that dog than I ever foresaw.Why just the other day when I went for my first session with the psychiatrist, she asked me, "What seems to be the trouble?" I replied, "Sex has been my best friend all my life but now it has left me for ever. I couldn't live any longer so lonely." and the doctor said, "Look mister, you should understand that sex isn't a man's best friend so get yourself a dog."
What a woman says: "This place is a mess C'mon, you and I need to clean up. Your stuff is lying on the floor, and you'll have no clothes to wear, if we don't do laundry right now!"
What a man hears: blah, blah, blah, blah, C'mon blah, blah, blah, blah, you and I blah, blah, blah, blah, on the floor blah, blah, blah, blah, no clothes blah, blah, blah, blah, right now !
Why do men chase women they have no intention of marrying? For the same reason dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.
Q: What's the difference between a dog barking on the front porch and a woman hollering on the back porch?
A: If you let them both inside, the dog will stop barking.
These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.
Q: Are you sexually active?
A: No, I just lie there. __________________________________
Q: What is your date of birth?
A: July 15th.
Q: What year?
A: Every year. __________________________________
Q: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
A: Gucci sweats and Reeboks. ________________________________________________
Q: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
A: Yes.
Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory? A
: I forget.
Q: You forget? Can you give us an example of something that you've forgotten?
Q: How old is your son, the one living with you?
A: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
Q: How long has he lived with you? A: Forty-five years. ______________________________________
Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke up that morning?
A: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
Q: And why did that upset you?
A: My name is Susan
Q: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo or the occult?
A: We both do.
Q: Voodoo?
A: We do.
Q: You do?
A: Yes, voodoo.
Q: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
A: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
Q: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he?
Q: Were you present when your picture was taken?
Q: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
A: Yes.
Q: And what were you doing at that time?
Q: She had three children, right?
A: Yes.
Q: How many were boys?
A: None.
Q: Were there any girls?
Q: How was your first marriage terminated?
A: By death.
Q: And by whose death was it terminated
Q: Can you describe the individual?
A: He was about medium height and had a beard.
Q: Was this a male, or a female
Q: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
A: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.
Q: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
A: Oral.
Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
Q: And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?
A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy.
Q: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for blood pressure?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for breathing?
A: No.
Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
A: No.
Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
Q: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere.
Weather over here is getting warmer..but windier and wetter..........soinds like a curry night!!!!:H
Well all the news is full of Margaret Thatchers passing....that has certainly incited some comment..both good and bad world wide..have seen some very derogatory comments ffs...comparisons to Hitler and things like that!!!!
My political and religious beliefs are mine and thats how they shall stay,only thing I will say is no matter what you thought of her or her policies, she had the courage and guts to see them through in an ever changing world...even her opponents have said that..cant see much courage and balls in any of the parties today..theyre all too busy trying to sort get out of jail free cards after being caught at expenses,subsidies,free holidays and the like!!:H
Movin on..tea and coffee are on the go..Im on cup number 2 now
Mornin TT...hows Brizzel today?trying to work out..did you emigrate? seem to know people all over the place!lad youre feeling a wee bit better today,,yep you are right you dont need drink to do any of those things, they happen any way, but not being kayleyed makes it easier to deal with them...Enjoy your time in Bristol
Morning Lav..one large cuppa madam.And how are you today?after your babysitting..as for gardening..yep maybe Im a wee bit early but its started .Spuds are in under a frost blanket, 3 different lots of strawberries, cabbage, carrots broccoli, beetroot, lettuce, radish, rhubarb, peppers ,toms, herbs, broad beans and garlic..all under polythene ..not that brave to take the covers off yet!!
As for twains...yep house this for sad..Thomas the tank names off the top of my head
Thomas, Percy Henry Edward Terence Dennis Clarabelle Anna Bertie.....how old am I ??:H
Have a great day
Morning YAH...lots of ouches...but not once did you mention al...well done you :wd:take your time it will be worth it
Hiya ppqp....one of those cooried up days hope you are ok..much as I would like to help you with the snow...eh no thanks!!!!..3Cs couch cuppa cooried!!!have a good one
Morning Kuya..how are you today ?tired I guess..and got to work too? jeez best of luck!!
As for the statement I dont have to do anything I dont want to .......hmm not quite true believe you me!!lets just leave that one...next!!Take it you havent been swimming recently..is it too cold over there now for any of that?Know youre at work ,but have a good day
Mornin SL...how are you? Nearly Wednesday..no more on call..then only 4 days off call? that isnt much of a level playing field!!!Dont mind me asking ..what is it you do?If you do just ignore
just seems a wee bit unfair those sort of odds! Any plans for your off time?Remember tomorrow when you get that aagh thats it over feeling the little voice doesnt try and tempt you with a celebratory drink..but Im sure your strong enough to tell it to bugger off!!
Morning Cat and how are you today?Good for you on the apple eating..I love them too ..specially the little ones.Moods and tempers do change ..there are never 2 the same..as for the conference call..maybe was the right thing..after all why get wound up over someone yakking down a piece of plastic!!
Well done on the sleep issue...now you need to get some more!!..and the positive note..look forward to see surviving being replace by improving
Right ho ..its time to go.........sheer poetry!!!! big shout to the missing throng wherever you are stay safe and sober
Everybody I know who has a dog usually calls him "Rover" or "Spot". I call mine Sex. Now, Sex has been very embarrassing to me. When I went to the City Hall to renew the dog's license, I told the clerk that I would like a license for Sex. He said, "I would like to have one too!" Then I said, "But she is a dog!" He said he didn't care what she looked like. I said, "You don't understand. ... I have had Sex since I was nine years old." He replied, "You must have been quite a strong boy." When I decided to get married, I told the minister that I would like to have Sex at the wedding.He told me to wait until after the wedding was over. I said, "But Sex has played a big part in my life and my whole world revolves around Sex." He said he didn't want to hear about my personal life and would not marry us in his church. I told him everyone would enjoy having Sex at the wedding. The next day we were married at the Justice of the Peace. My family was barred from the church from then on. When my wife and I went on our honeymoon, I took the dog with me. When we checked into the motel, I told the clerk that I wanted a room for me and my wife and a special room for Sex. He said that every room in the motel is a place for sex. I said, "You don't understand. ... Sex keeps me awake at night." The clerk said, "Me too!" One day I entered Sex in a contest. But before the competition began, the dog ran away. Another contestant asked me why I was just looking around. I told him that I was going to have Sex in the contest. He said that I should have sold my own tickets. "You don't understand," I said, "I hoped to have Sex on TV." He called me a show off. When my wife and I separated, we went to court to fight for custody of the dog. I said, "Your Honor, I had Sex before I was married but Sex left me after I was married." The Judge said, "Me too!" Last night Sex ran off again. I spent hours looking all over for her. A cop came over and asked me what I was doing in the alley at 4 o'clock in the morning. I said, "I'm looking for Sex." -- My case comes up next Thursday. Well now I've been thrown in jail, been divorced and had more damn troubles with that dog than I ever foresaw.Why just the other day when I went for my first session with the psychiatrist, she asked me, "What seems to be the trouble?" I replied, "Sex has been my best friend all my life but now it has left me for ever. I couldn't live any longer so lonely." and the doctor said, "Look mister, you should understand that sex isn't a man's best friend so get yourself a dog."
What a woman says: "This place is a mess C'mon, you and I need to clean up. Your stuff is lying on the floor, and you'll have no clothes to wear, if we don't do laundry right now!"
What a man hears: blah, blah, blah, blah, C'mon blah, blah, blah, blah, you and I blah, blah, blah, blah, on the floor blah, blah, blah, blah, no clothes blah, blah, blah, blah, right now !
Why do men chase women they have no intention of marrying? For the same reason dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.
Q: What's the difference between a dog barking on the front porch and a woman hollering on the back porch?
A: If you let them both inside, the dog will stop barking.
These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.
Q: Are you sexually active?
A: No, I just lie there. __________________________________
Q: What is your date of birth?
A: July 15th.
Q: What year?
A: Every year. __________________________________
Q: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
A: Gucci sweats and Reeboks. ________________________________________________
Q: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
A: Yes.
Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory? A
: I forget.
Q: You forget? Can you give us an example of something that you've forgotten?
Q: How old is your son, the one living with you?
A: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
Q: How long has he lived with you? A: Forty-five years. ______________________________________
Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke up that morning?
A: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
Q: And why did that upset you?
A: My name is Susan
Q: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo or the occult?
A: We both do.
Q: Voodoo?
A: We do.
Q: You do?
A: Yes, voodoo.
Q: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
A: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
Q: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he?
Q: Were you present when your picture was taken?
Q: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
A: Yes.
Q: And what were you doing at that time?
Q: She had three children, right?
A: Yes.
Q: How many were boys?
A: None.
Q: Were there any girls?
Q: How was your first marriage terminated?
A: By death.
Q: And by whose death was it terminated
Q: Can you describe the individual?
A: He was about medium height and had a beard.
Q: Was this a male, or a female
Q: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
A: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.
Q: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
A: Oral.
Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
Q: And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?
A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy.
Q: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for blood pressure?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for breathing?
A: No.
Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
A: No.
Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
Q: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere.
.com......
PPQP
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