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**Mick** · August 13, 2013, 01:43 AM

af day Tuesday 13th Aug

oops forgot the jokes!!!!!

A man was walking along the street when he saw a ladder going into the clouds. As any of us would do, he climbed the ladder. He reached a cloud, upon which sat a rather plump and very ugly woman. "Screw me or climb the ladder to success," she said.
No contest, thought the man, so he climbed the ladder to the next cloud. On this cloud was a slightly thinner woman, who was slightly easier on the eye. "Screw me hard or climb the ladder to success," she said. "Well," thought the man, "might as well carry on."
On the next cloud was an even more attractive lady who, this time, was quite attractive. "Screw me now or climb the ladder to success," she uttered. As he turned her down and went on up the ladder, the man thought to himself that this was getting better the further he went.
On the next cloud was an absolute beauty. Slim, attractive, the lot. "Screw me here and now or climb the ladder to success," she flirted. Unable to imagine what could be waiting, and being a gambling man, he decided to climb again. When he reached the next cloud, there was a 400 pound ugly man, arm pit hair showing, flies buzzing around his head.
"Who are you?" the man asked.
"Hello" said the ugly fat man, "I'm Cess!"

I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not

You're never too old to learn something stupid.

When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.

You are such a good friend that if we were on a sinking ship together and there was only one life jacket... I'd miss you heaps and think of you often.

I got in a fight one time with a really big guy, and he said, "I'm going to mop the floor with your face." I said, "You'll be sorry." He said, "Oh, yeah? Why?" I said, "Well, you won't be able to get into the corners very well."

Knowledge is power, and power corrupts. So study hard and be evil.

To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.

A bargain is something you don't need at a price you can't resist.

Some people hear voices.. Some see invisible people.. Others have no imagination whatsoever.

A TV can insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer.

If winning isn't everything why do they keep score?

Virginity is like a soapbubble, one prick and it is gone.

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you!

A bus is a vehicle that runs twice as fast when you are after it as when you are in it.

Hallmark Card: "I'm so miserable without you, it's almost like you're still here."

Whoever coined the phrase "Quiet as a mouse" has never stepped on one.

If you are supposed to learn from your mistakes, why do some people have more than one child.

Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.

**treetops** · August 13, 2013, 02:03 AM

af day Tuesday 13th Aug

Hi there - I am in one sober piece -had a dreadful day yesterday and now have to make some big decisions - that also affect other people's decisions- so my ability to focus on other people's decisions is not very good at the moment. I will be back in posting mood soon. Have a lot of work to do tonight as well :wave:

**BlondeAFAmbition** · August 13, 2013, 05:43 AM

af day Tuesday 13th Aug

Good morning all. I always enjoyed the daily abbers thread so here I am now that I am trying to get back on track. First sober day (yesterday) under my belt and feeling much better this morning than I did yesterday morning, that's for sure! Hope you all have a wonderful day. Off to work in a few moments but wanted to say hi and be accountable. Thanks for the java, Mick. I still like mine extra strong, piping hot and black (like a good French roast)

Have a super sober day to all.

Blessings!

**Mick** · August 13, 2013, 07:45 AM

af day Tuesday 13th Aug

Hiya blonde af ...welcome to the madhoose!!glad you are feeling better today ..

**Lavande** · August 13, 2013, 07:53 AM

af day Tuesday 13th Aug

Good morning Abbers,

Super crappy weather here today complete with severe T storm, flooding & tornado warning up already

Guess I'm not going anywhere today

Thanks for the coffee Mick. My coffee maker actually bit the dust yesterday so I need to go buy a new one as soon as this weather let's up :H

TT, hope you are OK - you sound pretty stressed:l

Blondie, let's keep those AF days going!

I will be back later - 'Lord willing & the flood waters don't rise' :H :H

Lav

**paulywogg** · August 13, 2013, 08:22 AM

af day Tuesday 13th Aug

happy tuesday everbody! mick,that "success"joke has got to be one of the best ever haha,welome blondafambition,listen to lav,she knows what shes talking about,keep those af days going,so i made the mistake of telling one of my regulars i quit drinking,every time he comes in for a haircut now,he goes on and on about how much hes drinking,hell have extra for me,yada,yada,just shut up i dont care! he used to be a fun customer,now hes just obnoxious,i think ill keep sobriety my dirty little secret,i hate telling people cuz its always the same,they grill you about why?when?why?uh because i was slowly killing myself,hows that for an answer,sorry just venting,i hope evryones day goes as planned,

p.s hugs tt

**porqoui** · August 13, 2013, 08:34 AM

af day Tuesday 13th Aug

MAE ALL...

Mick...oh yeah, go ahead and make me pull out the Urban Dictionary for "tu". Just for that I'll have a second cuppa.
Good lord, what are you doing with the paving slabs? Are these existing ones that have to be moved for the extended greenhouse? You must drive Julie crazy!

TT...special delivery :angel:PPP:angel: Glad to hear you're still in one sober piece, sad to hear you had a dreadful day.
I know all too well about those "big decisions" just remember to decide what's best for you. :l

BAFA...yup that's you BlondeAFAmbition...:welcome: I read on another thread yesterday that the best part of AF Day 2 is it's not AF Day 1...made me chuckle.
Looking forward to getting to know you...so stick around.

Lav...morning to you. Man 2013 is going to be the year of "weather". How does Stella fair during these T-Storms? So now you actually have a reason for going to IKEA. New coffee maker! But for today it sounds like a cuddle up on the couch with a good book.

Pauly...morning and vent away. I have found that those who "grill" me are actually looking for their own answers. It is going to be so interesting to read your posts once you get past this stage of your AF journey. Now I have to go and read the "success" joke, and all the others. Hope your day goes as planned. :l

Well my big decision was made and I accepted the job. Told my boss that the proposed salary was Industry Standard Average and I am way above "Average". Can't believe I said that but his come back was I agree and another raise will be forth coming in September (beginning of our fiscal year). Gotta say I wouldn't have stood up for myself if I was still riding the roller coaster. New position takes effect August 15th, yet another reason to celebrate on Thursday!

Have a great AF Tuesday all and all to come...

PPQP

**Samstone** · August 13, 2013, 09:05 AM

af day Tuesday 13th Aug

Morning all
glad to be here and knowing why I'm here. Pauly, one thing I've found with people I know is that there's no way they can understand what booze does to me, how it grabs me and won't let go. So I don't really bother telling anybody much of anything.

Welcome Blondie, I'm pretty new here as well.

TT, be thinking of you.

PQ, congrats on your job and raise!

Lav, keep you root cellar ready.

Mick, got a good chuckle out of the bargain. Got to remember that at the right occasion.

Enjoy your day
Sam

**YoungAtHeart** · August 13, 2013, 09:39 AM

af day Tuesday 13th Aug

MAE Fabbies!

Welcome BAFA! I hope you don't mind your nickname! We try to make names simple around here. Hope day 2 goes well for you and that you hang around and get on the ABs wagon with all of us.

Mick, I am quite sure that you don't know how to just relax and just BE! You are one productive man!

Your joke about the computer rubbing it in about feeling stupid fit the bill this morning unfortunately.

TT, sorry you had a difficult day yesterday. I hope that today is better. Glad you survived sober, which makes any difficult day a success in my book. Do look after yourself!

I hope the back end of the weather gets through your neck of the woods soon, Lav. I think we've gotten through the worst of it here, so it can't be too far from you. You have sure been through the wringer this summer, though. I hope you have found a source of coffee.......

Pauly, your regular sounds pretty anxious about his own drinking.....sorry he is bugging you about having stopped. People can be such dopes sometimes. You are in a much better place; don't forget that!

PPQP, good on you for stepping up and taking the job. Even better for knowing your worth and saying so! You are one perfectly poised PPQP, girlfriend!

Hope you have a good day, Sam. Any news on how things are working out with the accident?

I'm still on tenterhooks waiting for news on the potential buyer for the house. They have asked for the disclosure statement, which is good. I am acting like such an alkie, though, I just so want this done yesterday!

Otherwise, I am drying tomatoes in a dehydrator to take care of the excess. Next, I'll dry some poblano peppers. I want to buy a bushel of peaches and make salsa and can it. Ms. Susie Homemaker here.......

Anyway, gotta get ready for the rest of my day. Have a good one all!

:l
YahYah

**Samstone** · August 13, 2013, 10:52 AM

af day Tuesday 13th Aug

YahYah

got a call from the rental place regarding the truck that was in the accident, 1000 deductible I pay, 70,000 to fix the truck, pay weekly rate till fixed, about 800.00 per week. Hope my insurance covers the 70,000, in theory, it should, who the hell knows. At least I don't feel like drinking about it.

(posted the same in subs)

Sam

**porqoui** · August 13, 2013, 11:46 AM

af day Tuesday 13th Aug

Thanks YahYah.........I went back to find the post by Sam about his truck accident and discovered I missed your 1 Year Celebration. Happy Belated Congratulations!!
Move over and I'll hang on tenterhooks with you. Got my fingers crossed.

Sam...glad you survived the wreck. Like you say hopefully your insurance covers the costs. Just one wee question...what does (posted the same in subs) mean? Sorry, don't mean to be nosy.

**Lavande** · August 13, 2013, 12:51 PM

af day Tuesday 13th Aug

Accidents are so freaking expensive Sam - sure hope your insurance company is on board!

PQ, do you have an anniversary coming up?? :H

The storm has moved out of here, thank goodness.
This summer has been crappy weather-wise. Looking forward to some (hopefully) decent Fall weather.
I'm catching up on paperwork & other non-strenuous activities today!

**Samstone** · August 13, 2013, 12:58 PM

af day Tuesday 13th Aug

porqoui;1543333 wrote: Thanks YahYah.........I went back to find the post by Sam about his truck accident and discovered I missed your 1 Year Celebration. Happy Belated Congratulations!!
Move over and I'll hang on tenterhooks with you. Got my fingers crossed.

Sam...glad you survived the wreck. Like you say hopefully your insurance covers the costs. Just one wee question...what does (posted the same in subs) mean? Sorry, don't mean to be nosy.

PQ
I had posted the same thing in the subscription forum. YahYah's in there as well.

Sam

**Cinders** · August 13, 2013, 01:42 PM

af day Tuesday 13th Aug

MAE Abbers,

I have been MIA but see others are doing well and some are having rough goes.

TT, I hope you get through this patch, soon.

SS, Hopefully your insurance company doesn't try to dust themselves of responsibility, too. I am not sure what my car insurance company would say of me driving a rental truck. 80K is a lot of money. Sheesh. If insurance doesn't come through, you should probably get a lawyer to minimize the cost.

I had this same fear when I was renting a UHaul to carry mom's furniture to her new place. I went ahead and purchased the UHaul insurance just in case.

Not much to report. Mood is very iffy, up and down but at least I am sober. :-)

I am trying to get motivated to rejoin life instead of just being at home sober. It is difficult. I am also finding myself having odd thoughts about my relationship with my husband. Things I just accepted are no longer acceptable. I see him through different eyes, as well as my children.

I am just starting out this journey, though, and recognize I have to grow in many ways.

Love,
Cindi

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