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    AF Wednesday 28 August 2013

    Well look what the cat dragged in! Back from hols, caught up a little with study and getting over holiday "flu". Had a great time seeing family - much better than I expected, so it was really sad leaving them again. NZ was wonderful as usual, though I need to work on my Zen mind with the in-laws; a couple of audible "oh, FFS" escaped my lips Sydney was great too, such a great atmosphere and beautiful weather. I was great on the flights (but still wouldn't rush to fly again!) and only hesitated momentarily when offered champagne. Was funny watching an "old-me" continually ask for more wine, get ruddy-cheeked and loud - not a pretty sight

    PPQ - huge congrats on your (over) one year!! I can believe it's snuck up so quickly. Love all your positivity on the thread.

    TT did you feel the Seddon quake? I loved how one of the residents described her damaged house as "cracked like a pav"! Discovered Mission Bay on our last day in town - so close to Auckland and so lovely - will stay there next time. Lovely beachy suburb. (Will check for photos later)

    Mick - I reckon your Sundays are collecting jokes as you really can't be still going with them this long!! Came back to a very overgrown garden and a plague of huge hairy caterpillars. Bright side is there are hundreds of poppies about to flower. Love them

    Hope everyone's doing well - will balance study and MWO time to catch up (ie, spend way too much time on here and leave everything till the last minute )

    #2
    AF Wednesday 28 August 2013

    Gidday Blonders! Glad you had a great time in the land of paradise - even if its a shaky pav. I didn't feel the quake where I live.

    Hi to everyone else - busy day here and I have to do some motivation therapy for revision with my daughter.

    Sober thoughts to all

    Comment


      #3
      AF Wednesday 28 August 2013

      morning all - I am on day 2 AF now. I made an appt with an online alcohol counsellor who has advised me I need to quit for at least a few months to get a handle on social anxiety.I am concentrating on one day at a time and have taken the advice,of course they won't say 'you need to stop' on session one,or at all. It's given me a kick.
      Day at a time,have bought electric cigarettes for social situations as well.
      look forward to catching up with you all,have wedding and 40th coming up,feeling confident.hope you are all well,was thinking may post in newbies nest too but i love you lot and you have real solid advice.
      happy wednesday.
      one day at a time

      Comment


        #4
        AF Wednesday 28 August 2013

        welcome back Bear!
        We are here for you. It won't hurt to also post in the Newbies section. The more reinforcement you get for your quit the better.

        Hey just don't overdo it! Try to keep to basics.

        Post every day and more than once a day :rays:

        Comment


          #5
          AF Wednesday 28 August 2013

          mae all........and how are we today?ok I hope on this humpday...apart from the standing on head people ..whose day has been well and truly humped already!!!:H was going to go out early today,but my eye is giving me a bit of grief ,so thats off the cards ..likewise swimming, so reckon I will just sit and moan instead ..sure I will find something to do

          Tea and coffee on the go

          Well well well ....look who has turned up ...blondie ..hiya how are you glad to "see"you.Glad you had a good time..Just found out,my nephew took a break from his work, decided to go travelling,met a Danish girl in Sydney,and the company he works for ..he is the procurements manager for a big brewery..they have offered him a job in Sydney,so methinks they are getting married and going to live there...excellent ,another holiday base for the future!!!As for the garden ..me too plenty of caterpillars..eaten all my brassicas....Poppies ..lurrrv them I have got 2 big uns...one yellow and one white with a purple centre..Anyway glad that you are back

          Hiya TT how are you this evening? still travailling with the homework?Whats motivation therapy for doing homework?

          Morning bear ..welcome back to you ..did you miss the madhouse?One day at a time ..thats all it takes with a little bit of go for it and support so you can do it

          Hiya Lav ..how are you today?ok?Did you get your hair cut? any plans for today or as it comes? heres a coffee to think about it with.

          Hi Sam ..hows you ? so so..did you get on with the fence?was the weather kind to you?Its still nice here ,but definitely on the turn

          Hiya Cinders...is it ok to come in ? rant over?At the risk of being told mind yer own business..can I say that somewhere along the line they have got to take responsibility for their own actions..what will be will be..think maybe you should have a word with your hubby ...no use him getting angry about it..yep its natural , but doesnt sort the problem and just creates a shit atmosphere for you two..time is precious make the most of it.Eyes are still rubbish ..watering like mad etc..here what I have planted and ordered
          Planted
          Scarlet globe radish
          Leeks Mussselburgh
          Lettuce lolla Rossi
          Cabbage early Durham
          Cauli all year round
          Kale
          Brussel sprouts (saved 3 plants from caterpillars)
          Potatoes Casablanca ..allegedly ready for Christmas day


          To plant
          Beetroot ..boltardy
          Carrot ..early autumn
          Onions Senyshu
          Spinach..perpetual
          Onios ..Bedfordshire champion
          Broad beans
          Garlic
          Peas

          that should be my veg planting up till December...going to try and force courgettes for a bit longer

          will do flowers later......good luck writing your cv for the job front


          Hiya SF....thats brill about the dye!!I remember years ago in Cornwall somewhere on holiday they had that in the pool..I remember seeing one woman ..absolutely mortified!!:H so hubby was prudent eh? trap shut ..do not engage in conversation..hmm been there..best to just turn up be as nice as ninepence..by that time its either forgotten ,or she is seriously pissed off that her narky mood isnt affecting my world!!:H

          Hiya ppqp ..how are you doing? your taking this job thingy seriously!!:HGlad you are liking it what are you up to?have a great day

          right peeps off we go have a good one ..wb bear n blondey

          Teacher: What are some products of the West Indies?
          Student: I don't know.
          Teacher: Of course, you do. Where do you get sugar from?
          Student: We borrow it from our neighbor.



          Why did the scientist install a knocker on his door? He wanted to win the No-bell prize!



          Judge to prostitute: So when did you realize you were raped?
          Prostitute, wiping away tears: When the check bounced.

          Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don?t have a good partner, you?d better have a good hand.


          When everything?s coming your way, you?re in the wrong lane.


          I say no to alcohol, it just doesn?t listen.

          If you can?t convince them, confuse them.


          Whenever I find the key to success, someone changes the lock.


          Why did the bee get married? Because he found his honey.


          What do you call a boomerang that doesn?t come back? A stick.


          Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?


          My birth certificate was a letter of apology that my dad got from the condom company?

          Time is what keeps things from happening all at once.


          Lottery: a tax on people who are bad at math.


          If at first you don?t succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.


          Eat right. Stay fit. Die anyway.


          I just let my mind wander, and it didn?t come back.


          IRS: We?ve got what it takes to take what you have got.

          I can handle pain until it hurts


          A bargain is something you don?t need at a price you can?t resist.

          You cannot taste me, until you undress me. -Banana

          You cannot eat me unless you lick me. -Ice-cream

          You cannot play with me unless you blow me. -Balloon


          You cannot eat me unless you spread me. -Butter


          Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience

          A day without smiling is a day wasted.

          Sometimes we expect more from others because we would be willing to do that much more for them.


          When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.
          af since the fourth of July 2012...howzat then America..now proudly marching into year 12

          Comment


            #6
            AF Wednesday 28 August 2013

            Feeling vey sinful. Just discovered. Licorice icecream. Amazing. Oh yum yum.
            Det - you would love this naughtiness (and I bet others too)

            Comment


              #7
              AF Wednesday 28 August 2013

              tt...discovered cherry bakewell flavour!!!
              af since the fourth of July 2012...howzat then America..now proudly marching into year 12

              Comment


                #8
                AF Wednesday 28 August 2013

                MAE Abbers!!

                Still dark here but a pleasant day should be had. Warm but low humidity. I have lots of gardening to do, myself, but am a bit flummoxed about how to deal with the ground squirrels that eat the roots of my bushes and flowers and the moles that dig around underneath the flowers disturbing the roots, and the armadillo that is digging in the garden. Perhaps I should let the gardens go fallow a few years so they all just go away. sigh.

                Mick, yes, hubby is furious with me because he does not want me to enable my very grown children. I do not pass on cash, though, but even lending the car is too much as far as he is concerned, while they run errands. Son even puts the gas back. Hubby has a very bad temper and sometimes even minutiae sets him off. All my life I have trod on egg shells because I never know what will anger him. If we are going to walk together into the sunset of our lives, he needs to learn to manage that temper and anger. Now that I am sober, I have no way to numb the anxiety his temper causes. Hmm. Must talk to counselor about this.

                Billy Graham's wife, he is a very famous American Christian preacher, was asked on their 40th anniversary if she had ever thought about divorce. She said, "Divorce? No!! Homicide, many times!!" I can relate. :H:H

                Blondie, It is great to see you back from holidays. It sounds like it was lovely. Good on you.

                Bear, Hi there!! Great to see you, also. Two months is very doable. It is a goal to keep your eyes on. We are here for you. Quite honestly, you will suffer anxiety whether you drink or not but drinking seriously exacerbates it. Remove the drink and you will find out the best way to mangage the anxiety. Otherwise the two are too intertwined. Take care and keep on doing the baby steps. The time will fly, trust me. It seems like yesterday was my last drink and I am over 5 months. Amazing.

                TT, Funny about licorice. It is one of those things people either love or hate. I love it, myself, although it does cause some side effects that are not always pleasant. :-)

                Does the ice cream turn your mouth black?

                I hope today is more pleasant for me regarding hubby. I'll let you all know. I love being able to vent.

                I will check back later to see how SF, PPQP, Det, Lav, SS and all other Abbers are doing.

                My sky is just now turning light, so it is time to go out back, drink some coffee and watch the birds wake up and visit the feeders. A peaceful time of day for me. It lets me remember I have much to be grateful for. Sobriety is at the top of that list.

                Love,
                Cindi
                AF April 9, 2016

                Comment


                  #9
                  AF Wednesday 28 August 2013

                  MAE ALL...

                  Blondie...thanks for the kickoff and welcome home. And thanks for the congrats. I think it was around 9 months when I quit counting the days and you're right next thing I knew it had been a year.

                  TT...hope the motivational therapy worked with your daughter. Oh to be back in the day when getting through my test was my biggest worry!

                  Bear...welcome back and congrats on day 2. Don't forget about the tool box as you build a new strategy plan. ODAT is the best place to start. At Sundays meeting we talked about change. Remember nothing changes if nothing changes. Those electric cigs are becoming very popular around here too. Food for thought for me.

                  Mick..." ..sure I will find something to do" don't make me laugh. Bummer about the eye, mine seems to be doing better. Was supposed to go for a follow up with my eye doc and got a (recorded) call that morning that all appointments were cancelled and the office would be closed till further notice. What's up with that! Message stated someone would be in contact to reschedule. Haven't heard anything yet.
                  Really enjoying the job ATM and we're all gearing up for year end. Sept is a very busy time so we'll see how much training I absorbed.

                  Cinders...can hardly wait to congratulate you on 6 AF months so a congrats on 5 will have to do for now. "Now that I am sober, I have no way to numb the anxiety his temper causes"
                  ...and so the next stage of your journey begins, learning to live sober. And MWO was my most valuable tool at this stage. I could log on and vent away and everyone of you knew exactly what I was talking about. Remember, you can't change him but you can change how you react to him. Hope your day with hubby is more pleasant too and vent, vent, vent away.

                  Pauly...if you're lurking I just want to say I'm thinking of you. :l

                  My mind is racing this morning with work thoughts. Going to finish my second cuppa, read the jokes, and head into work early. I get more work done before the start of the day than I do all day long. Love it. Have a great AF Wednesday all and all to come....PPQP

                  Comment


                    #10
                    AF Wednesday 28 August 2013

                    Good morning Abbers & Happy Humpday

                    TT, I have never heard of licorice ice cream......wonder if I can make a vegan version, hmmm.

                    Welcome back blondie! Seems like you were away forever!!!!
                    Glad you are well & had a good time!

                    Hello bear & welcome back!
                    Focus on just today, don't worry about the future, it isn't here yet

                    Greetings Mick!
                    Yes, I did get my hair cut I'm happy to say. Funny how such a small gesture changes your outlook. I'm going to meet friends for lunch later & didn't want that too hairy look :H
                    I hope your eye is OK, geez!
                    You plant quite a substantial winter garden! The broccoli probably isn't going to make it thru the bunny rabbit assaults :H

                    Cindi, I know it is hard to watch your adult kids make poor choices. It's very hard to stop yourself from jumping in & taking over but that's our job at this point. We need to trust that we've taught them well & now it's up to them to make better choices. Showing them by example is simply the best method I think
                    You know I know all about grumpy husbands....... they are another subset that can learn by watching a good example

                    Hello to everyone else & sending wishes to all for a wonderful AF Wednesday!
                    Lav
                    AF since 03/26/09
                    NF since 05/19/09
                    Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

                    Comment


                      #11
                      AF Wednesday 28 August 2013

                      aww ppq,you know im lurking,thank you
                      I have too much shit to do today and tomorrow to drink:sohappy:

                      I'm taking care of the "tomorrow me":thumbsup:
                      Drinkin won't help a damn thing! Will only make me sick for DAYS and that ugly, spacey dumb feeling-no thanks!

                      Comment


                        #12
                        AF Wednesday 28 August 2013

                        MAE, Fabbies,

                        Pauly, I have been thinking of you a lot lately. I hope the flooding in Vegas has eased up and that it hasn't affected you too much. The pictures have been rather frightening.

                        Welcome back, blondie! I'm glad you had a good time, but I missed you very much. I can relate to the memories of drinks on the plane.

                        Good luck with the motivational therapy with your daughter, TT! Licorice ice cream.......that sounds positively orgasmic!

                        I am happy to see you again, bear. One day at a time, girl, one step at a time.....I think that breaking it down into a shorter period will help you, and it will be harder to get a handle on the social anxiety without getting a handle on who you are without the alcohol.

                        It's evening for you, Mick. Boy, you sure are a master gardener! I'm just so impressed. I hope your eye feels better soon. Conjunctivitis is just so nasty. :upset:

                        Ah, Cinders, what to say about hubby? Hmmmm.....I'm glad you can come here to vent, too. He sounds a tad cranky to me. I agree that we shouldn't enable our grown children, but damn, it sure is hard sometimes! There is also a difference between giving a hand up and giving a handout. I think he is being EXTREMELY inflexible in the matter of the chickens! :H

                        Hi Lav! I hope you are enjoying your new 'do. I think you are awfully optimistic about husbands learning by example. Maybe that is your positivity coming through. At least you can stay positive, though. If they want to stay grumpy, so be it. Can't wait until you get your new chickies. You know I will want blow-by-blow descriptions of their daily routine.

                        I'm glad everything is going well in your world, PPQP. You sound like you are adjusting very well to your new job.

                        Things are going well here. I'm feeling more positive and optimistic, and it feels good after a long, kind of down summer.

                        :l
                        YahYah
                        AF as of August 5th, 2012

                        Comment


                          #13
                          AF Wednesday 28 August 2013

                          Thanks for the welcome back everyone - sat on sofa eating chocolate atm - yummy,hormonal at the moment so it's got to be done - 2 choc biccies,choc bar and a choc ice cream lolly! I just feel like eating chocolate and prawn crackers - may just have a fried egg roll for dinner. I am going to let myself just enjoy it.
                          Back to cooking healthy food with lots of roasted veg on the side tomorrow.
                          one day at a time

                          Comment


                            #14
                            AF Wednesday 28 August 2013

                            Chocolate for dinner sounds good to me bear - enjoy

                            YahYah, I am filled to the gills with optimism :H
                            I really always have been - I just forgot for several years after I fell into YB's pit of anger & despair. Glad to have my mojo back! I have strengthened up my protective boundaries.....he's not going to throw me off track again (or anyone else for that matter). Right now my niece stationed in Germany is attacking me by email - she is a serious psycho-bitch! I have a long history with that girl& have dealt with her lifelong anger issues. I don't know how she has managed a military career but she's still in at the age of 43. I guess she doesn't like herself very much :H :H

                            I just had a nice lunch with my old hospital friends - man are we ever getting to be old but we are all happy!
                            AF since 03/26/09
                            NF since 05/19/09
                            Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

                            Comment


                              #15
                              AF Wednesday 28 August 2013

                              Oh thats too bad about your niece Lavande. Glad you had a fun lunch. take care

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