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Do you need a sexual relationship to be happy?

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    #1

    Do you need a sexual relationship to be happy?

    Hey everyone,
    I'm a couple months in to this whole "sobriety" thing and have been working the steps. They've shown me that my relationship with women has basically been "get drunk, then insert object here." :blush:

    I haven't had much love for myself, so naturally I haven't really been able to love women. This has resulted in all my relationships being dysfunctional, and I've been cheated on a couple times due to not caring enough about her. This has basically led me to believe that all women are evil, selfish Succubus' from Hell that are always looking for the next best thing (kidding. kind of)

    I'm 27 now, and I've pretty much subscribed to the thought "I wouldn't want to join a club that would accept me," but with women. My self-esteem has been shot.

    Now that I'm feeling better about myself, I'm starting to become interested in having a relationship with a woman. I have my heart set on one woman in particular, but I probably won't be able to see her for a few months at least. Lately I've been getting these thoughts that I'm not a real man or won't be truly happy unless I'm in a sexual relationship. This feels like bullshit to me, but these thoughts won't go away. Does anyone have any experience with this? It doesn't seem right to me that you're not truly human unless you're constantly having sex.
    Knowledge of what is possible is the beginning of happiness.
    George Santayana
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    #2
    Do you need a sexual relationship to be happy?

    You're 27 - I think there would something medically wrong with you if you weren't constantly thinking about sex!

    Everyone is different, but for me sex isn't the be all and end all of a relationship. I love sex, don't get me wrong! But the closeness, sharing, everyday affection, and intimacy that comes with the relationship with the one you are having sex with is more fulfilling to me and what I miss when I'm not in a relationship.
    Well it's all right now. I've learned my lesson well. You see you can't please everyone, so you've got to please yourself.

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      #3
      Do you need a sexual relationship to be happy?

      SlipperyPete;1613702 wrote: Hey everyone,
      I'm a couple months in to this whole "sobriety" thing and have been working the steps. They've shown me that my relationship with women has basically been "get drunk, then insert object here." :blush:

      I haven't had much love for myself, so naturally I haven't really been able to love women. This has resulted in all my relationships being dysfunctional, and I've been cheated on a couple times due to not caring enough about her. This has basically led me to believe that all women are evil, selfish Succubus' from Hell that are always looking for the next best thing (kidding. kind of)

      I'm 27 now, and I've pretty much subscribed to the thought "I wouldn't want to join a club that would accept me," but with women. My self-esteem has been shot.

      Now that I'm feeling better about myself, I'm starting to become interested in having a relationship with a woman. I have my heart set on one woman in particular, but I probably won't be able to see her for a few months at least. Lately I've been getting these thoughts that I'm not a real man or won't be truly happy unless I'm in a sexual relationship. This feels like bullshit to me, but these thoughts won't go away. Does anyone have any experience with this? It doesn't seem right to me that you're not truly human unless you're constantly having sex.
      Well men and women are different and in my experience you would be normal to be thinking about sex all the time. As a women, I can honestly say I could really care less if I ever had sex again. I don't know how other women feel, but what I would prefer is a man to be my best friend and life companion to share all life has to offer. The only way I could enjoy sex is if it were with someone who I was going to be with forever. If you truly want to have a long term relationship I think the old school way is best. Take time to learn each other and fall in love. Maybe I have just experienced too much meaninglessness sex
      AL free since March 17th 2011...loving this life. No drinking no matter what.

      Hi my name is Lori and i am so happy to be here.

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        #4
        Do you need a sexual relationship to be happy?

        For me I would need to have a good sexual relationship and thank god I do.

        Men have two emotions. Hungry and horny. If you see a man without an erection than make him a sandwich.
        Whoever I had become, the alcoholic, had to die.

        Comment

          #5
          Do you need a sexual relationship to be happy?

          TrueGrit;1617556 wrote: For me I would need to have a good sexual relationship and thank god I do.

          Men have two emotions. Hungry and horny. If you see a man without an erection than make him a sandwich.
          Lol that's cool mate I definitely agree :goodjob:
          Alcohol will hit you bad but you can always turn your back
          Alcohol can bring a lot of misery but there is a solution because it's not a mystery
          Alcohol will give you pleasure but in the future it will give you pain that you cannot treasure

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