mornin all....at least it wiz when I got up....how is everyone today then?Had it in my head that I had to go and pick the outlaws up tonight...rechecked last night ..just as well..picked them up from the airport at 2am this mornin..got home about 3am ..a wee bit tired,plus Julie isnt so well.Chicken broth and a chuckie egg for her then!
ok brew time ...here we go then...
see there are a few of you expecting hurricanes coming in ...batten down the hatches...Lav get that greenhouse secured!!
I stumbled into bed last night,
she said "You're drunk!"
I said "AND??"
She said "You live next fcking door!!
Paddy buys a bath but takes it back the next day complaining that the water keeps running out.
The manager asks, "did you buy a plug?"
Paddy says, " You never said it was electric!"
I saw my GP this morning, he said iv'e got Paranoia
Well he didn't say it
but i knew what he was thinking!!
What's got 88 eyes and 1 tooth?... The front row of a Willie Nelson concert.
I've just taken out the batteries on my carbon monoxide alarm as the beeping was giving me a head ache and making me feel sick
A stockboy is stacking fruit on a display, when a lady asks "Do you have any potatoes? "
The stockboy replies "Sorry ma'am, we are out of potatoes, but we will be getting a shipment tomorrow morning"
The lady looks around some more. A few mins later she runs back to him asking where the potatoes are.
The stockboy confused about her mental state simply tells her "Sorry ma'am, we are out of potatoes, but we will be getting a shipment tomorrow morning"
The lady looks around some more then goes back to the same stockboy and asks "Where the hell do you keep the potatoes, I need some potatoes right now!"
The stockboy, getting frustrated with his inability to explain the situation, tells the lady "Answers a couple of questions and I will get you your potatoes from the back."
The lady agrees and the man starts the questions.
"Spell cat for me, as in catastrophe " she says Ok, "C A T". "Very good!" the stockboy says, "now spell dog, as in dogmatic. "
The lady getting frustrated spells it correct. Now the employee finally asks "now spell, Feck, as in potatoes. "
She replies "There is no Feck in potatoes?"
To which the stockboy replies "THAT'S WHAT I'VE BEEN TRYING TO TELL YOU THE WHOLE TIME!"
I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.
I was walking down the street the other day and I saw these two blind blokes squaring up to fight. I shouted "My money's on the one with the knife."
You should have seen how fast they both ran off.
14212031_1374078315955245_2037090287190888314_n.jpg
ok brew time ...here we go then...
see there are a few of you expecting hurricanes coming in ...batten down the hatches...Lav get that greenhouse secured!!
I stumbled into bed last night,
she said "You're drunk!"
I said "AND??"
She said "You live next fcking door!!
Paddy buys a bath but takes it back the next day complaining that the water keeps running out.
The manager asks, "did you buy a plug?"
Paddy says, " You never said it was electric!"
I saw my GP this morning, he said iv'e got Paranoia
Well he didn't say it
but i knew what he was thinking!!
What's got 88 eyes and 1 tooth?... The front row of a Willie Nelson concert.
I've just taken out the batteries on my carbon monoxide alarm as the beeping was giving me a head ache and making me feel sick
A stockboy is stacking fruit on a display, when a lady asks "Do you have any potatoes? "
The stockboy replies "Sorry ma'am, we are out of potatoes, but we will be getting a shipment tomorrow morning"
The lady looks around some more. A few mins later she runs back to him asking where the potatoes are.
The stockboy confused about her mental state simply tells her "Sorry ma'am, we are out of potatoes, but we will be getting a shipment tomorrow morning"
The lady looks around some more then goes back to the same stockboy and asks "Where the hell do you keep the potatoes, I need some potatoes right now!"
The stockboy, getting frustrated with his inability to explain the situation, tells the lady "Answers a couple of questions and I will get you your potatoes from the back."
The lady agrees and the man starts the questions.
"Spell cat for me, as in catastrophe " she says Ok, "C A T". "Very good!" the stockboy says, "now spell dog, as in dogmatic. "
The lady getting frustrated spells it correct. Now the employee finally asks "now spell, Feck, as in potatoes. "
She replies "There is no Feck in potatoes?"
To which the stockboy replies "THAT'S WHAT I'VE BEEN TRYING TO TELL YOU THE WHOLE TIME!"
I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.
I was walking down the street the other day and I saw these two blind blokes squaring up to fight. I shouted "My money's on the one with the knife."
You should have seen how fast they both ran off.
14212031_1374078315955245_2037090287190888314_n.jpg
Comment