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Thread: Worried

  1. #1
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    10th June, 2013.
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    Hi everyone...

    I have a younger sister in her thirties who has always liked a drink, but she has become more and more dependant on it and is now in the position that her health is being compromised and her marriage.

    Our mum died quite young two years ago, and it has really hit us both hard. She likes to drink strong stuff, like whiskey or brandy and doesn't ever herself a single, in fact if she was at the pub and someone bought her a so blue she would look at it in disgust and drink it in one mouthful....

    Her husband drinks at least 4-6 cans of beer each night though he never mentions this is a problem to either of them and happily gives in to her demands of buying her alcohol so he can still get his beer, they both don't help each other.

    She has started being sick after eating a small amount of food, her face is very puffy and her stomach is huge and bloated, her husband decided to tel me last night that she has been hiding bottles in their bedroom and that he caught her trying to take brandy to work as she is in pain with toothache and thought it would help.

    She always gets defensive if you mention her drinking and makes a point of bringing up other people's bad habits to justify her Behaviour, I know she is deeply unhappy with herself, she smokes heavily and has a constant cough but does seem to have the will power to do anything , she has two beautiful daughters and she just can't see that she is slowly hurting herself and them, I am worried sick and don't know what to do....her husband says he is sick of babysitting her but hasn't suggested she needs help he thinks she can just stop, what do you think....

    Thanks so much for reading x

  2. #2
    Registered User. Kradle123's Avatar

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    16th January, 2007.
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    Hi Sunshine:

    I'm so glad you reached out here. That has got to be a lonely position to be in. :l

    How close are you to your brother in law? That's the first place I might start - having that 'intervention' talk with him...
    I'm sure by now you know that there's little we can do to help someone who simply doesn't see that there is a problem or doesn't care.

    For years I knew there was a problem but honestly I could have cared less. Ultimately it was my health and my children that started me on the road to healing myself.

    I don't know if this is possible but do you think you could try to get her to have a look at this sight? DOn't know what that kind of persuasion would look but....she could at least have a glimpse that we are all out here rowing in the same boat as she is !

    Please stay close. So many good people and ideas here it's scary !


  3. #3
    Registered User. hart's Avatar

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    9th May, 2007.
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    Sunshine. Until your sister is willing to seek help it's going to be really hard to get her to stop. You might try an intervention with her husband and children and yourself. BUT if her husband is not willing to give up his drinking too, that may not work. You are right to be worried and I'm sorry I cannot be more optimistic but until someone is willing to stop all the wishing on loved ones parts usually does not good. She may have to hit rock bottom which may be getting caught drinking at work. Hang in there.

  4. #4
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    26th February, 2007.
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    Sometimes making a comment that is a wake-up call about appearance helps. You could say in a constructive way that she's looking very puffy and unwell, some kind of comparison with how attractive she is without overdoing the booze. She might get angry at you but if it's true it might affect her in a way that she gets shaken into changing.

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