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  1. #3691
    Registered User. Lost Soul's Avatar

    Join Date;
    4th May, 2009.
    Northern Ireland.
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    Hi Salem, Thank you for sharing your story, I'm sorry you are suffering so badly at the moment & indeed it sounds like for a long time.
    To compound your difficulties & struggles with it alcohol from what you've said it sounds as if your ex husband is being emotionally abusive toward you by not accepting responsibility for his actions & being dishonest with your children which I can imagine feels very hurtful when you worked so hard to hold your family together when he was struggling.

    You sound like you have overcome many challenges & are very stong & brave. Perhaps it's a time to put yourself first & foremost because you deserve to be happy and healthy.

    I really hope you can access real life support & as Ava & Daisy said, come join in on the newbies nest thread, it is a very supportive thread for people who are just starting out ☺
    To see a world in a grain of sand
    And a heaven in a wildflower.
    Hold infinity in the palm of your hand,
    And eternity in an hour.

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  3. #3692
    Registered User. j-vo's Avatar

    Join Date;
    30th March, 2008.
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    Hi Salem
    I'm so sorry for your situation. I hope that you'll be able to do the medical detox. You need to start there first. And you must put yourself first. As hard as it is to believe, you can eventually have a life that you're proud of, kids who will trust you, and you will love yourself. It takes one day at a time, one step at a time. We are in the nest and there's so much love and support there. Please fly on over there.
    Sometimes what you're most afraid of doing is the very thing that will set you free.

  4. #3693
    Forum Subscriber. Mom2JTx3's Avatar

    Join Date;
    10th October, 2012.
    East coast sort of.
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    SalemWillows... I sent you a PM. Click notifications/inbox to read.

  5. #3694
    Registered User.

    Join Date;
    10th April, 2008.
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    Re: Anyone in the First Week of Their Unpteenth Quit?

    I grew up with alcoholic parents. Alcohol is a way of life where I's everywhere, all the time. The grocery stores carry excellent wine. I always thought that I could control my drinking, but I cannot if I drink on any sort of regular basis. So now I plan to ask for either nothing to drink or for water with a lemon or lime slice when we/I go to any sort of party or celebration. I carry non-alcoholic beer to our best friends' house when we go there for supper. I've tried the non-alcoholic wines, but so far, all are way too sweet. I did find a pear tea that is a lovely substitute (iced) for wine. The weather here does not get extremely cold, so I drink iced tea often, but they sure don't serve it at parties.
    We are going out of town soon and to a big wedding, but I will not ask for that glass (that magically turns into 5 or 6) of wine. I have lots of girlfriends (with great figures) who do not drink and I want to lose weight and carry on without the alcohol. My husband is a heavy drinker, but wants to help me.
    Keep it up, Sober Soul...I have taken up knitting to keep my hands busy. It helps, as do audio books to help me get to sleep.
    Try and try and try again and just take a day at a time.

  6. #3695
    Forum Subscriber. Slo's Avatar

    Join Date;
    22nd June, 2013.
    Midwest USA.
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    Re: Anyone in the First Week of Their Unpteenth Quit?

    @readytotry, I find taking AF beer to parties or dinners helps me too, as I don’t like to have too many sweet drinks. Lately I’ve tried de-alcoholized wines, but I agree that they can be too sweet. @NoSugar knits to keep her hands busy too!
    Best of luck to you, and we would love to have you join in here.
    Once a pickle, never a cucumber again.

  7. #3696
    Registered User. 4theboyz's Avatar

    Join Date;
    18th February, 2008.
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    Re: Anyone in the First Week of Their Unpteenth Quit?

    I am in my 15th Day 1 and was exactly in your shoes 433 days ago and had to finally get real and stop. What I also realized was, like you, that past traumas from my childhood were haunting me and driving how I reacted to anxiety and stress in my adult life where alcohol made all things emotionally challenging better. I had to learn techniques for dealing with past and current traumas in healthy ways free of drugs and alcohol. I tell everyone who is struggling to write it all down. Writing serves as a record you can turn to so you can review what you once thought was working and when it doesn't it is infinitely easier to learn from your mistakes. I have a journal here I started in 2008 that has all 15 of my day ones and being able to read about my successes and failures has helped immensely for me to finally get 14 months sober. Best wishes!
    Is Addiction Really a Disease?
    Watch this and find out....

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