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    1. #471
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      Re: The Three Principles Discussion Thread

      That is a great story, @JackieM! What a great way to think of it. I think I have that book and will go over it again. It is so interesting how you can hear or read something for the second or third time and suddenly is makes sense.

      The response I've gotten from most people is dismissing it as an idea that "everything is relative" and that I'm saying nothing is real. I really ran into trouble when I claimed that Trump's presidency is a neutral event and that how we think about it creates our experience of it. My very liberal pals think this means I'm saying it is "ok" to cage immigrants. My response is, No, I think that is horrible. But clearly, other people are thinking it is just fine and just as I am very upset by our political situation, other people are pleased. To me that is PROOF that we are creating our own reality. When I hear that people on the other side are "living in a different world", I totally agree!!


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    3. #472
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      Re: The Three Principles Discussion Thread

      @NoSugar-
      I recently heard "A circumstance is just a circumstance until you label it". Nothing could be more true.

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    5. #473
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      Re: The Three Principles Discussion Thread

      I get a daily email and today's hits on what we've been talking about:
      Epictetus could not have summed up Stoicism better than when he said: “It’s not things that upset us, but our judgement about things.” What he meant was that the world is neither positive or negative, it is simply objectively indifferent. A hurricane is a hurricane. Striking gold is simply discovering metal in the ground. It’s our opinions of those events which decide that one is horrible and the other is a blessing.Of course, Epictetus was not saying there is no such thing as “good” or “bad,” at least as far as morality is concerned. While morality is a judgment, it’s an acceptable one when we apply it to actions that are within our control (that is, our own behavior). The trouble is that we can’t seem to keep these judgments contained to that area of influence. We make up categories and then try to organize the world into them...and are often miserable when fate doesn’t get the memo.
      Death, of course, is the ultimate example. It’s neither good nor bad. It simply is. Each of us is going to die. That’s a fact. It’s not really a positive or a negative fact, particularly since it carries with it the end of our ability to have an opinion about it. Yet that doesn’t seem to stop us from worrying about it, from spending a lot of time trying to decide what it means and whether we like it or not.
      How miserable this makes people! How many awful and stupid things they do to prevent it, from betraying their friends to missing out on enjoying life in misguided attempts to prolong their existence. As Epictetus said, “Death...is nothing terrible, but the terrible thing is the opinion that death is terrible.”
      Hopefully you can chew on this a bit today. Death is not bad. It’s simply a fact. Indeed, everything is simply a fact. We’d be happier and more present if we could accept this. If we could stop fooling ourselves into thinking our opinions change anything (except to make stuff worse, most of the time).
      No judgment. No need to label or categorize. Just take life as it comes.


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    7. #474
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      Re: The Three Principles Discussion Thread

      Quote Originally Posted by NoSugar View Post
      That is a great story, @JackieM! What a great way to think of it. I think I have that book and will go over it again. It is so interesting how you can hear or read something for the second or third time and suddenly is makes sense.

      The response I've gotten from most people is dismissing it as an idea that "everything is relative" and that I'm saying nothing is real. I really ran into trouble when I claimed that Trump's presidency is a neutral event and that how we think about it creates our experience of it. My very liberal pals think this means I'm saying it is "ok" to cage immigrants. My response is, No, I think that is horrible. But clearly, other people are thinking it is just fine and just as I am very upset by our political situation, other people are pleased. To me that is PROOF that we are creating our own reality. When I hear that people on the other side are "living in a different world", I totally agree!!
      This is a great example NS, I have the opinion that my way is the right way but I guess I really is just how "I" react and view it
      I have too much shit to do today and tomorrow to drink

      I'm taking care of the "tomorrow me"

      Off the table no MATTER what.

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    9. #475
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      Re: The Three Principles Discussion Thread

      I just read "It's All In the Mind, You Know!" by Phil Hughes. He offers up many metaphors to help the reader see that thoughts are just thoughts. An easy read but very insightful.

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    11. #476
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      Re: The Three Principles Discussion Thread

      Quote Originally Posted by JackieM View Post
      I just read "It's All In the Mind, You Know!" by Phil Hughes. He offers up many metaphors to help the reader see that thoughts are just thoughts. An easy read but very insightful.
      Thanks for the recommendation! I am really enjoying reading it and getting new perspectives on how we operate !


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    13. #477
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      Re: The Three Principles Discussion Thread

      @NoSugar-

      Glad you are enjoying the book. I love how different people have their own unique way of pointing to the same thing.
      I never get tired of reading 3Ps material or listening to podcasts. I have listened to several talks by Bill Pettit in the past few weeks. I find his approach fascinating.

    14. #478
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      Re: The Three Principles Discussion Thread

      @JackieM, I so wish my daughter, who is a mental health(??) care provider would "get" this! I love how Pettit admits he knew a lot about mental distress and illness but nothing about mental health. This understanding has made it so much easier to deal with the stuff of life. I rarely make up big stories about what other people are thinking or feeling about me or anything else anymore. I used to drive myself crazy with that business!


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      Re: The Three Principles Discussion Thread

      @NoSugar-
      I honestly don't know how/why I "got"this. I know you and @kuya pointed me in the direction of the 3ps but I am not sure exactly what lifted the veil. It's like you put sticks of dynamite in the dam, something ignited them, and the dam crumbled.If I could only find the ignitor....

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    18. #480
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      Re: The Three Principles Discussion Thread

      Hi again..
      I've been reading from the Little Book of Big Change.. and there's a lot of good stuff to take in.
      Here's a paragraph that hit home for me.. ""While we don't necessarily have any input into the thoughts or commands that appear in our awareness, we do have a say in whether or not we obey them. Neuroscientists refer to the ability to veto any thought that occurs to us as 'free won't'. The presence of urges (or any thoughts for that matter) is not our business--our free will cannot determine what shows up. But the choice to respect or act on those urges is where we do have some say. We have free won't. No matter how loud and powerful your urges are, you (via wisdom and your higher brain) make the behavioral choice. It may not feel like you have a choice at times, especially if you haven't fully seen that you in charge.. but the choice is always possible.""
      I'm taking this out of context, in that the book is meant to be read from beginning to end.. not skipping around. But I do love the idea of free won't.. being able to veto thoughts/urges.

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