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  1. #671
    Forum Subscriber. dill's Avatar

    Join Date;
    1st January, 2009.
    United States.
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    Re: Do You REALLY Want To Be Sober?

    I just saw this post last night and read it and thought about you a great deal last night, Cowboy. I have no more advice than to say you must do what is right for you while also being supportive of B and doing your best for her too. What those things will ultimately be, time will tell. As regards to your question of whether or not you are "just being selfish" I do not think so at all. No more than anyone else is being. In fact maybe a little bit less. I'm sorry you have to be in this dilemma. I can only tell you that I would be reacting the same way as you and would not want to move in with my in-laws if the situation arose. Whose to say what I would actually do if Mr. D made that choice (which I am sure wouldn't be something he would consider) but it's not a given that I would go with him. I don't think that would be selfishness. There are ways we want to live our lives and need to live our lives and if we don't then resentment will likely become a daily presence. You are not being selfish because it is obvious that you are willing to make many changes, concessions and accommodations to help your wife and in-laws. But we each have our needs and those must not be ignored. Yours need to be accommodated as well as theirs. You and B have a loving relationship and I am confident you will find your way thru.

    I know how hard it must be to be watching dear Hank suffer. He's lucky to be loved so well.

    I'm glad you have the seeding to look forward to! Maybe we in the cafť will have some pictures from the field to enjoy like last year!

    Donít forget, you can: start late, start over, be unsure, try and fail AND STILL SUCCEED!

    If it is important to you, you will find a way. If not, you will find an excuse.

  2. #672
    Forum Subscriber. abcowboy's Avatar

    Join Date;
    1st September, 2014.
    N.E. Alberta.
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    Ya know, I just got to say THANK YOU to everyone! I sure appreciate the comments and different perspectives, both here and in the pm's. I know my situation isn't as bad as some of you other folk have it, but no matter how big the problem is, if you're struggling with it, this place is a Godsend!
    Quitting and staying quit isnít easy, itís learning a whole new way of thinking. Itís accepting a new way of life, and not just accepting it, embracing it...
    Worry about tomorrow, tomorrow. Just get through today. Tomorrow will look after itself when it becomes today, because today is all we have to think about.
    Friendship is not about how many friends you have or who you've known the longest. It's about who walked into your life, said "I'm here for you", and proved it.

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