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  1. #1
    Registered User.

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    31st October, 2014.
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    Have now quit for good

    Have now quit for good

    Had a bit of a party November and December some including hangovers that made me very ill.

    I did go out on 31st December and drank till about 3am but now iím done for this decade.

    I actually felt so ill on the morning of the 31st that I took it easy on new years eve.

    For a few days into the new year I had a slight pain in the right side which must be cramp.... yea right, i know what it is. Stupid to continue.

    I did kind of have it under control but it only takes one or two big nights for me to be on the brink again.
    Glad itís over and now can look forward to being a happy non drinker.

  2. #2
    Registered User. byebyebridgetjones's Avatar

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    Re: Have now quit for good

    Good on you, Kev. You got there in the end.
    We are never 'in control' of alcohol. It is always in control of us. Sad truth.
    Re-read the tool box, lots of threads, join the discussion. Get as many weapons into your arsenal as you can.
    Good to see you on the flip side, mate.
    If your 8 year old self met you, would they be proud?
    Rejoined life 20/5/19

  3. #3
    Registered User. mollyka's Avatar

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    Re: Have now quit for good

    Good decision Kev... those periods of 'being in control' -- they truly are our enemy -- most if not all problem drinkers/alcoholics can have periods of 'control' with alcohol through their drinking career... I know I had - in the depths of my heaviest drinking I managed to successfully drink within limits I set for myself for months and months... and then.... whoops -- off it went -- off the radar.. but because we WANT to be able to drink before we get to the stage that we know there is no going back -- we concentrate on those times.. we tell ourselves 'I can do this' -- it's just weakness ….. NO IT'S NOT --- it's addiction -- cunning - baffling - powerful...

    Now it's in your hands - you can turn your life around completely --- OR --- you can not drink for a week - a month - a year - and tell yourself 'it's ok -- I can do this now - I can drink responsibly' --- NO YOU CAN'T!!!!

    For now - it's just for today Kev.. get to the end of the day and say 'today I didn't drink' -- and do the same tomorrow -- simple as -- well done
    Contentedly sober since 27/12/2011
    contentedly NF since 8/04/14

  4. #4
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    Re: Have now quit for good

    Quote Originally Posted by mollyka View Post
    Good decision Kev... those periods of 'being in control' -- they truly are our enemy -- most if not all problem drinkers/alcoholics can have periods of 'control' with alcohol through their drinking career... I know I had - in the depths of my heaviest drinking I managed to successfully drink within limits I set for myself for months and months... and then.... whoops -- off it went -- off the radar.. but because we WANT to be able to drink before we get to the stage that we know there is no going back -- we concentrate on those times.. we tell ourselves 'I can do this' -- it's just weakness ….. NO IT'S NOT --- it's addiction -- cunning - baffling - powerful...

    Now it's in your hands - you can turn your life around completely --- OR --- you can not drink for a week - a month - a year - and tell yourself 'it's ok -- I can do this now - I can drink responsibly' --- NO YOU CAN'T!!!!

    For now - it's just for today Kev.. get to the end of the day and say 'today I didn't drink' -- and do the same tomorrow -- simple as -- well done
    Thank you. But I'm going with a different approach than that. Just saying glad I didn't drink today is a mindset that I could fail at some point. The correct mindeset is "isn't it great my life is no longer dominated by devistation!!" Then you know your free.

    :-) :-)

  5. #5
    Registered User. mollyka's Avatar

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    Re: Have now quit for good

    Whatever works for you Kev.. you've probably had long stints of sobriety in the past and know it will work and that's great. Unfortunately for me that would not work as down the road somewhere - in a year - 5 years - I would decide that my life was going to be heaps better dominated by alcohol (devastation).
    I need to keep it very very simple - it's just 'no' for me -- of course a year or so into sobriety I worked on myself and examined the why's etc... but at the beginning -- I just said 'no' -- as they told me in rehab - 'leave your brains at the front door' --- but that's just me Kev.. I'm sure you know what's best for you -- good luck
    Contentedly sober since 27/12/2011
    contentedly NF since 8/04/14

  6. #6
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    Re: Have now quit for good

    Quote Originally Posted by mollyka View Post
    Whatever works for you Kev.. you've probably had long stints of sobriety in the past and know it will work and that's great. Unfortunately for me that would not work as down the road somewhere - in a year - 5 years - I would decide that my life was going to be heaps better dominated by alcohol (devastation).
    I need to keep it very very simple - it's just 'no' for me -- of course a year or so into sobriety I worked on myself and examined the why's etc... but at the beginning -- I just said 'no' -- as they told me in rehab - 'leave your brains at the front door' --- but that's just me Kev.. I'm sure you know what's best for you -- good luck
    Yes whatever works for you.

    How long have you been sober for?

  7. #7
    Registered User. Pavati's Avatar

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    Re: Have now quit for good

    Glad you've thrown in the towel.

    I needed to both take one day at a time AND acknowledge that I could never drink again. Drinking couldn't be a choice when I was stressed, happy, anxious, whatever, so that had to be absolutely no. On the other hand, focusing on what was 8 months away wasn't working too well either, and unless I gave myself daily goals (at least at the start), I knew my brain would say - just this one...

    As you can see from her signature, Molly has been sober since 2011.

    Stick close.

    Pavati

  8. #8
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    Re: Have now quit for good

    Quote Originally Posted by Pavati View Post
    Glad you've thrown in the towel.

    I needed to both take one day at a time AND acknowledge that I could never drink again. Drinking couldn't be a choice when I was stressed, happy, anxious, whatever, so that had to be absolutely no. On the other hand, focusing on what was 8 months away wasn't working too well either, and unless I gave myself daily goals (at least at the start), I knew my brain would say - just this one...

    As you can see from her signature, Molly has been sober since 2011.

    Stick close.

    Pavati
    wonderful, that is almost 10 years. I hope to do the same and more.

    I 'm not going to lie and say I didn't enjoy the getting drunk times. Luckily for me I only ever got to the stage of going out with mates to get drunk and never drank alone or mornings. The pub & group drinking has its own down side in that you are constantly buying rounds and not wanting to go home early or anything. We stay to the bitter end in the pub each time. Also had weekends away to other towns/cities just to go round the pubs and for no other reason.
    I text mates and drag them to the pub.... “Hey a football game is on, meet you there, hey world cup is on,, boxing on, let’s get cans and come to mine since I have the tv channels

    It’s only slightly better than drinking alone to cure a pain or feel good and is still a massive amount consumed. Perhaps that’s why I was able to do it for about 20 years and not have any known ill effects since I would usually let myself recover for a few days before doing it again.

    I do know that taking paracetamol for hangovers recently made my liver scream but that was only the icing on the cake. There must have been times it was coming close to damage with the alcohol alone. Not a problem when am 25-33 or whatever but it might only be a matter of time before something happend.

    Everyone’s story is different.
    Love all you non drinker people 
    Last edited by scotskev81; January 7th, 2020 at 10:26 AM.

  9. #9
    Registered User. satz123's Avatar

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    Re: Have now quit for good

    Hey @scotskev - almost a week in - how are you doing ?
    I do know that taking paracetamol for hangovers recently made my liver scream but that was only the icing on the cake. There must have been times it was coming close to damage with the alcohol alone. Not a problem when am 25-33 or whatever but it might only be a matter of time before something happens.
    That worries me. Something HAS happened - you are addicted to alcohol & your liver is telling you this.
    Forget blaming the Paracetamol - it's the alcohol .Your body is giving you signs & you blame it on a few paracetamol ?
    Time to grow up I'm afraid.
    Sorry to be blunt but I have a son in the height of it too - I've heard it all - constantly trying to normalise it & side-stepping the REAL issue.
    Benji ....
    Doing it my way

    .... the joy of being sober never gets old !!

  10. #10
    Registered User. satz123's Avatar

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    Re: Have now quit for good

    Not sure if you are still around @scotskev but as the others have said we want to save you a world of pain if you stop now & I'm being an Irish Mammy here.
    Found this on another thread of yours - posed by Byrdy. Can you fit into any of these now ?
    I reckon between Stage 2 - heading to 3 ? I know that's where my own 39 year old son is.

    Alcoholism: The Second Stage

    In the second stage of alcoholism, the need to drink becomes more powerful. For example, it is common during this stage for the problem drinker to start to drink earlier in the day.

    As tolerance increases, furthermore, the individual with the drinking problem drinks not because of psychological tension or stress relief, but because of his or her dependence on alcohol. During this stage of the disease, even though the "loss of control" does not occur on a regular basis, it is, nevertheless, starting to become more noticeable by others such as relatives, family members, neighbors, friends, and co-workers.

    Also during this stage of the disease, the problem drinker may begin to feel more concerned and embarrassed about his or her drinking. Often during this stage, problem drinkers are unsuccessful in their attempts to stop drinking.

    In this stage, physical symptoms such as hangovers, blackouts, hand tremors, and stomach problems increase. Interestingly, instead of seeing their drinking as the root of the many problems and issues they experience, however, drinkers with a drinking problem in this stage frequently start to blame others and things external to themselves for their difficulties.

    Alcoholism: The Third Stage

    In the third stage of alcoholism, the loss of control becomes more severe and more observable. This means that problem drinkers are unable to drink in accordance with their intentions. For example, once the individual takes the first drink, he or she commonly can no longer control further drinking behavior, in spite of the fact that the intent might have been to have just "one or two drinks." It should be stressed that an important aspect of this stage of the illness is the following: the drinker often starts to experience more serious drinking problems as well as alcohol-related employment, relationship, financial, and legal problems.
    Last edited by satz123; January 13th, 2020 at 11:50 AM.
    Benji ....
    Doing it my way

    .... the joy of being sober never gets old !!

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