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  • Page 7788 of 7800 FirstFirst ... 67887288768877387778778677877788778977907798 ... LastLast
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    Thread: Newbies Nest

    1. #77871
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      Lavande's Avatar

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      Re: Newbies Nest

      Good evening Nesters,

      I survived a 12 hr day with an 8 & 10 year old, now I’m tired, haha!!! Kids are so full of energy at the beginning of summer vacation

      Ava, sounds like a throat infection is coming your way, sorry. I hope you feel better very soon
      I also hope your employer has enough sense to step forward & offer you better pay for all your hard work!

      Slo, my nephew apparently had some beers in him when he flipped his truck on the road. Kids around here seem to think it’s OK to drink & drive at 18 His parents were never the same after that. His father (my BIL) took his own life almost 5 years ago after all those years of serious depression. So sad for everyone.

      Touch, I never got into trying non-alcoholic wine & I don't think I would because I was trying to please someone else. I just told people I feel better when I’m not drinking (truth) & they can have whatever they want. I also did not feel the need to explain my actions to anyone. You have to find your comfort area & do whatever is best for you.

      HHF, Pav, NS, hello to you & everyone checking in tonight!
      Now I need to go tuck in my chickens before it gets dark & I forget, LOL
      Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

      Lav
      AF since 03/26/09
      NF since 05/19/09
      Success comes one day at a time

    2. #77872
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      Re: Newbies Nest

      I will NEVER forget meeting NS for 30 seconds at the Charlotte airport! It was like a dream! She is a tiny thing!
      Busy with this tradeshow, so will only check in now and say I’m thinking of you all. Stay strong, everyone, no matter what and no matter who! Byrdie
      All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
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      Newbie's Nest

    3. #77873
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      Re: Newbies Nest

      Felt relieved today to not be pestered by my AV, I actually felt positive and hopeful, it was nice. I believe the biggest thing I have to overcome right now is thinking in the future. I'm exhausted fromm working and can't think straight but wanted to log on.

      I appologize for any Welcomes that I didn't acknowledge, I sincerely appreciate them. I'm just so tired I can't focus

      Good night!

    4. #77874
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      BelleGirl's Avatar

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      Re: Newbies Nest

      I really have to find my way out again from this insanity. I've had no big incidents, but I am surely headed that way. I could go on and on about life stresses right now, but the bottom line is that I have to get my sobriety back 100%. I am truly sick of myself. I have been awol here and it shows. Lord, please make this my final day one. Friends, please rally for me. I cannot do this any longer. yes, I'm sober now, but last night wasn't good. fortunately I was in bed before hubby came home. I know I can ask for help but in the end the only one that can help me is me.
      Last edited by BelleGirl; June 13th, 2019 at 06:46 AM.
      BelleGirl

      Done with this drinking shit...

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      Re: Newbies Nest

      Hi, All:

      BELLE! Welcome back. of course we are here for you. I know you know this, but all of those stressors will seem smaller if you're handling them sober and un-hungover. What is your plan for today and tonight?

      Touch - I had a very hard time with forever. I was what I would call "functional." I didn't miss work, didn't drive under the influence, didn't change personalities and get angry or sad, and most days didn't over do it. But the last year, drinking started really amping up, so I tried to "moderate." I went a month without, but boy did I rejoin the drinking with a bang. I started drinking more every night, and to paraphrase Robin Williams, started breaking my standards faster than I could lower them. This all culminated in what I have come to call the Thanksgiving Massacre. I drank too much four days in a row, including one night at a local bar at a reunion so all of the people I hadn't seen in years got to see me drunk. I felt so down on myself, and so physically awful, and I knew I had to quit. I felt the same as you - I had fully accepted that it had to happen, so I was never worried about alcohol in my house, or being around it in any way. That acceptance made everything else work. Once I accepted that I could never drink again and keep the life I wanted, I adjusted from there. Alcohol would NEVER be the answer to what to do when stressed, celebrating, anxious, etc. You sound great - keep it up.

      I appreciate coming here and typing things like that. Even though I am 5.5 years without booze, it is a good exercise to remember how and why I am here, and to reflect on all I have gained. Thanks for letting me waffle.

      Ava - those shits. I am glad that you stood up for yourself and gave them the answer you deserve. Did they tell you the criteria they think you're missing? I feel as though Lav should unleash the Stella and/or I can send you my brick to use.

      Happy SOBER Thursday!

      Pav

    6. Thanks Touch, Slo, lifechange thanked for this post
    7. #77876
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      Re: Newbies Nest

      Lavande, I've found people pleasing to be a problem in my life. Once, (as a policy, I don't eat sugar . . . though I drank my alcohol sugars pretty much daily), for breakfast on a camping trip, I ate a huge glazed doughnut topped with whipped cream and strawberry syrup because another camper invited us over to her motorhome for breakfast. I went with 3 other people who declined the massive breakfast dessert, (and 2 of the decliners were people who would eat a pastry for breakfast without blinking an eye)!
      Again, I felt shame that I ate it, not wanting it at all, but feeling like I had to appreciate the effort she went into, the gift she was offering. Not eating it felt like a judgement of her, a rejection. Anyway, that's the kind of weird thought process I get going sometimes.
      I think if in my heart, I was done with alcohol for good and not planning to moderate after I'm done with this period of abstinence, I would just say, "I don't drink anymore". But I'm not there yet. I have to tell you I have a healthy fear about going back, even for special occasions, but especially since a very close drinking buddy may be coming to stay for a couple of weeks in August. It's not for sure yet, but that will be the true test for me . . . again, going back in my mind to people pleasing. BUT, I'm not going that far into the future. If it even happens at all, it's 3 months away. And I believe I'll know before then what my life plan will be.
      For today, I'm happy and grateful to wake up, finishing my 1st whole week (!) without alcohol, without a puffy red face, and most importantly without regrets!
      Last edited by Touch; June 13th, 2019 at 09:47 AM.

    8. Thanks Lavande thanked for this post
    9. #77877
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      Re: Newbies Nest

      Pavati, thank you; the stories really do help me. 5 and a half years! That is fantastic! I think no alcohol has weirdly helped me with stress and anxiety. It's like my stress and anxiety were all coming from drinking! Now, the celebrating: that's the rub for me, but it's starting to feel possible, or at least in the realm of possibility . . .

    10. #77878
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      Re: Newbies Nest

      Morning All!

      Some really great posts on here!

      Belle, we did miss you and I am sorry that you are having a hard time. Sometimes it takes getting sick and tired of being sick and tired before you can really keep that sober muscle strong. I mentioned before that I first got sober in AA and got a pocket full of newcomer chips before I realized that my slips weren't doing me any good at all. My life started sliding down hill fast. Get in from work, put purse down, take bottle out, and end barfing the evening barfing in the toilet. My personality changed as soon as I started drinking, I was nasty and would do the most unacceptable things and pass them off as acceptable. I would wake up in the morning and have to do my best to figure out exactly what I had done the night before. I was sober two years and got away with drinking moderately for a long time, till I didn't. Hubby is not a fan of drunks so I got to the point that I was drinking as soon as he left the house and had to get those bottles out on garbage day so that there was less of a chance of him finding a bottle. My personality was definitely changing again and my low was drinking a lot one night and not finishing the bottle so I went a head and finished the bottle at 6am to get it in the garbage because they come around 7am. It was time to stop! 11 weeks today!

      Belle, get on here and post as often as you need to, it really helps to squash that AV.

      Touch, I know it will be hard for you this weekend but do have a plan, plans work. I am glad that you do not have a clear bottom to point to make the decision not to drink, but I bet if you think back, there are lots of little bottoms. Like I said for me it was a lot of unacceptable behavior that really piled up the first time. Stay strong an post on here when you need to.

      Slo, that was funny about the colonoscopy. I no longer have a choice about it. I did have ovarian cancer 7 years ago and did quite well with it, but now they check me for everything that might be cancerous, you just never know. The benign polyp thing is common in my family so I am not too worried about it, but it is always great when I hear back from that everything is okay. I am not happy about the 3 year club though.

      Happy, good for you for checking in, even if it just to say hello.

      Hubby has left this morning . A hard day the day he leaves and I have to go to the war zone in a little bit. I have asked hubby and daughter in the last two days to pick up bread and milk when they were out and both forgot. I have to go to the store . I feel pretty good about it though, not so tempted but I will not let my guard down. It has rained already this morning so I have a window of some decent weather. When I get back I will strip and stain some seat bottoms and a little chair that needs to be refinished. The chair was my grandfathers and my mother once redid it when my 50+ brother was little. It is time to do it again. The chair is kind of a funny piece of furniture for me, it reminds me of the tv show 'The Middle'. The youngest child is the third, what ever works child, as my brother was, and he sits at the dinner table in a lawn chair. This chair was once a bar stool type chair that my grand father sat on behind the cash register of his candy store when he retired. My dad made it into a dinner table chair for my brother but wound up cutting it down too much to get it level so my bother was always the munchkin at the table. It is just a great memory for me now and an excellent step stool in a pinch.

      I hope everyone has a wonderful Sober Thursday! Belle, Happy and Touch, I am sending out good vibes to you!

    11. #77879
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      Re: Newbies Nest

      Lavande, I've found people pleasing to be a problem in my life. Once, (as a policy, I don't eat sugar . . . though I drank my alcohol sugars pretty much daily), for breakfast on a camping trip, I ate a huge glazed doughnut topped with whipped cream and strawberry syrup because another camper invited us over to her motorhome for breakfast. I went with 3 other people who declined the massive breakfast dessert, (and 2 of the decliners were people who would eat a pastry for breakfast without blinking an eye)!
      Again, I felt shame that I ate it, not wanting it at all, but feeling like I had to appreciate the effort she went into. Not eating it felt like a judgement of her. Anyway, that's the kind of weird thought process I get going sometimes.
      I think if in my heart, I was done with alcohol for good and not planning to moderate after I'm done with this period of abstinence, I would just say, "I don't drink anymore". But I'm not there yet. I have to tell you I have a healthy fear about going back, even for special occasions, but especially since a very close drinking buddy may be coming to stay for a couple of weeks in August. It's not for sure yet, but that will be the true test for me . . . again, going back in my mind to people pleasing. BUT, I'm not going that far into the future. If it even happens at all, it's 3 months away. And I believe I'll know before then what my life plan will be.
      For today, I'm happy and grateful to wake up, finishing my 1st whole week (!) without alcohol, without waking up with a puffy red face, and most importantly without regrets!
      Last edited by Touch; June 13th, 2019 at 03:35 PM.

    12. Likes New Sunrise, Byrdlady liked this post
    13. #77880
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      Re: Newbies Nest

      Just a quick hi from me. We are in Victoria, BC for my daughter’s graduation- BSc in biological science. What a kid!

      I will celebrate with a big glass of club soda, oh yeah baby!

      p.s. So cool that Byrdie and NS got to meet. I would have bawled my eyes out.

      Xo
      Narilly

      "Nothing in this World Can take the place of Persistence"
      "You can have the life you want OR you can Drink"

      AF April 12, 2014

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