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  • Page 7896 of 7914 FirstFirst ... 68967396779678467886789478957896789778987906 ... LastLast
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    Thread: Newbies Nest

    1. #78951
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      Re: Newbies Nest

      Kensho, I'm really glad you're staying on top of this discomfort you're feeling.. I think reading back on the posts you wrote the first months you were quitting is a great idea! I remember you being on a scary roller coaster, feeling like you were sinking, completely out of control. You were quite unhappy. It does not matter, as Byrdie said above, how much you were drinking! It's how it affected you!
      Pav responded to a thread in our stories.. "it's my turn, by 4theboyz".. I read the last few pages and there was a lot I could relate to. There's a great post about Pain and finding ways to keep the PAIN/the reasons we quit drinking in the first place, present in our minds.. as memories/realities fade and change with time.
      I definitely don't want to lose sight of my reasons to get out of hell.
      Last edited by lifechange; October 21st, 2019 at 01:20 PM.

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    3. #78952
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      Re: Newbies Nest

      @KENSHO, if a comment I carelessly made is the one that is bothering you, I sincerely apologize. I did not mean to convey the message you apparently received, but that's on me. Communication is the responsibility of the one speaking or writing. I won't try to explain again what I meant because it doesn't really matter. What matters is what you think.

      My greatest hope for you and everyone here is to have the peace of mind that many of us have found by deciding not to drink alcohol again. The nagging, intruding thoughts you're experiencing now after 22 months are further evidence (to me) that you indeed should not drink ever again.

      Please close that door and embrace without question the life you want and deserve. I hope you find peace, NS


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    5. #78953
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      Re: Newbies Nest

      Good evening Nesters,

      NS, I have to agree with your view on AL. Close the door & enjoy your AF life which is what we all really want.
      I spent a few years with memories of my drinking days hanging around in the background. They weren’t especially bothersome, they were just there. But now, after all this time I have found the memories have been moved to ‘storage’. I can certainly bring them back if I needed to do so but I don’t need them. I slammed the door on AL 10.5 years ago & I won’t be opening it anytime soon.

      Kensho, you have done so well. I think we are all confident that you will keep your quit. Keep doing what. You have been doing, stay here & keep that AL door closed

      I got to have lunch with an old work friend today. I am now watching two very loud little boys, haha! My day is complete.

      Hello to everyone & wishing for a safe night in the nest for all!

      Lav
      AF since 03/26/09
      NF since 05/19/09
      Success comes one day at a time

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      Re: Newbies Nest

      Kensho - I think it's a good idea to read old posts. I think that it really helps to remind ourselves of how we were.
      Sometimes it just helps to remind myself of the way it really was. My situation wasn't pretty and I don't ever want to be there again.
      "Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.".....Carol Burnett
      ..........
      AF - 7-27-15

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    8. #78955
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      Re: Newbies Nest

      No apologies NS... just shows how manipulative this addiction is. It took what you said and I heard what I wanted to hear. It’s on ME. Wouldn't we ALL like to believe we no longer have a problem, that we’re fixed? Like I said yesterday, nothing you or anyone can say will change the experience I’ve had with alcohol. Beneath the wishful thinking is the sad truth of what my days had become, controlled by alcohol. I Just have to work at remembering it all. Thanks Nora, LC.

      Lav, was this a work friend from the medical field? How is your husband doing?

      Hope everyone has a good day.
      Last edited by KENSHO; October 22nd, 2019 at 09:44 AM.
      Kensho

      Done. Moving on to life.

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      Re: Newbies Nest

      Morning all:

      Mr. G, I've been thinking about this idea:
      Quote Originally Posted by Guitarista View Post
      What other people think is none of my business.
      I can so easily get caught up in worrying about what other people think and say. The fact is that when I am grounded and have conviction in what I am saying or doing, I don't worry nearly as much. That grounding and conviction is around MUCH more now that I don't drink. And I LOVE the idea that whatever others think about me is none of my business. I had a recent experience where I was 100% fretting and worrying that other people had misunderstood my intention and me! I got some good advice from good friends and I was able to calm down and see the incident for what it was - a reflection of THEIR insecurity and unfamiliarity with the facts. Anyhoooo - put another check mark in the "what I've gained from being sober" column.

      Good to see you pop in, Nora. I hope all is well...

      Ava - making furniture can be horrendous or funny - glad you had the funny experience. Again, choosing that lens is crucial.

      The weather turned again here and it is HOT again. I am hoping we get rain soon and move on to autumn...

      Happy SOBER Tuesday,
      Pav

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      Re: Newbies Nest

      Hi Nesters,

      late check in for me again.. My mom and I are out in the country with a very good friend of mine.. brought my laptop along 'cause I thought I might want/need to check in with all of you. And though I don't think I really NEEDED to tonight, I'm very glad that I can. I'm glad I have this nest to come home to. It makes me feel grounded right now.. I know that no matter what happens during the day, I can come here and feel ok.
      Pav and G-man, those were very timely words.. I went into work this morning and immediately picked up on the unspoken/and spoken! stress that was present. I also learned that I wasn't invited to a special birthday party of one of our co workers on Friday evening.. it was a bit of a strange situation as two people were talking about it as if I was going.. and then one finally asked and I said, no I'm not.. the other, who is my closest colleague knew but hadn't mentioned to me that she had been invited. My first feelings were those of being left out.. but when I was honest with myself, first of all I wouldn't have gone with my mom still being here.. second, I wouldn't really have wanted to go anyway. It was just the not being invited part which is quite egocentric of me.
      I love that.. the above.. what other people think of me is none of my business!!

      So my friend here drank half a bottle of wine and is starting on the whiskey as she talks to her boyfriend on the phone.. I don't think she drinks enough to feel crappy in the morning.. but I do wonder about her need to drink alone.. especially when she knows about my drinking issues and my mom's history.. ? I think she probably just doesn't want to make an issue out of it..but strange.

      Anyway, I'm very glad NOT to have alcohol in my life.
      I'm tired as tired can be so hitting the hay at 9pm.
      Hugs to everyone.. thank you so much for being here and see you tomorrrow--xx
      Last edited by lifechange; October 22nd, 2019 at 03:02 PM.

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      Re: Newbies Nest

      Good to hear from you, LC . I'm glad checking in here has become a positive experience for you instead of yet another task.

      That was pretty thoughtless of your friend but maybe people who truly can take it or leave it just aren't sensitive to what it feels like not to be so carefree. Or, maybe she indeed has a problem. I certainly didn't let many people or events stand in the way of my nightly fix. It is so sad and embarrassing to think about that now but like we've been discussing, it is good to remember where we were and never want to be again.


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    15. #78959
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      Re: Newbies Nest

      What a day. Blech.
      It is hard to shrug off hurtful words and actions, I’m still working on that myself. I know that you can’t please everyone. One of the things I just love about sales (not).
      AL IS gross.
      hugs to all, Byrdie.
      All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
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      Re: Newbies Nest

      Good evening Nesters,

      Still raining here, wish I could share some with you Pav.

      Kensho, yes I did meet with a nurse friend yesterday. She’s the only one still working in our circle of friends. If it wasn’t the need for health insurance she would be retired like the rest of us. I feel bad for her, dealing with several autoimmune diseases & still making it to work! Btw, this friend no longer drinks at all due to all the meds sh’s on. Not drinking is becoming perfectly normal & acceptable!

      Hi Nora & NS!

      LC, friends can be real shitty sometimes. People change & get weird but you don’t have to be bothered by them. Keep on enjoying your AF life & your Mom.

      Hello to the whole gang & wishing a safe night in the nest for all!

      Lav
      AF since 03/26/09
      NF since 05/19/09
      Success comes one day at a time

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