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  • Page 7914 of 7914 FirstFirst ... 69147414781478647904791279137914
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    Thread: Newbies Nest

    1. #79131
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      Lavande's Avatar

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      Re: Newbies Nest

      Good evening Nesters,

      Reporting in from frozenland, ha ha!! We never got the snow that was predicted today& I’m OK with that. It is so cold I have plugged in a small space heater for my chickens so their feet won’t freeze to the roost overnight, ugh!
      Catching up on orders from customers has kept me busy & out of trouble

      Belle, welcome back! Please settle yourself in & stay put!
      The tool box is still loaded with terrific ideas. Use them to make your own personal plan. Get your triggers covered for sure.
      YOU have to make the decision to kick AL out of your life once & for all. Slam the door closed & never look back & you will succeed as many of us have. Wishing you the very best!

      NS, sorry you have the real deal cold & snow. Hang in there!

      Ava, that 3 month hibernation in the beginning of our quits worked like a charm, don’t you think?
      Coning up on your 6 years is amazing

      LC, try not to worry about the friends right now, please. Keep your focus where it belongs - on you.
      Good friends would never drop you because of your drink choice. I sure hope they know better.

      Kensho, I’ll bet you can book some day trips for you & the kids while your husband hangs out in the wineries, if that’s what he wants to do.
      I remember some very cool bus tours out of Paris to Normandy & Brugge, Belgium. My daughter & I had a ball

      Hi to Pav, Byrdie & everyone.

      Wishing us all a warm & safe night in the nest!

      Lav
      AF since 03/26/09
      NF since 05/19/09
      Success comes one day at a time

    2. #79132
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      Re: Newbies Nest

      Lav! I forgot to tell you I have chickens now too! Got them as chicks two springs ago. I love them so much!! It’s cold here too. I do not warm my chickens though haha. Hay and plastic up on the coop and feed them corn all winter.

      Bella, glad you’re here! Let yourself feel the feelings and then dust yourself off. Like G says, being sober is badass! I like to be badass, so I think about that when I want to drink too!

      Guys, I had a scary craving today. It was 3pm at work and I felt my brain start planning to stop for wine after work. I kept saying no. It was very hard but I went straight home.

      I am eating too much but I’m sober.

      Xoxo all!
      Day 1 again 11/5/19
      Goal 1: 7 days
      Goal 2: 14 days
      Goal 3: 21 days
      Goal 4: 30 days
      One day at a time.

    3. #79133
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      Re: Newbies Nest

      Nursie, I love “badass”!*Self pride. Let’s not forget how cool it is to take care of ourselves!!

      Sleep tight Nest!
      Last edited by KENSHO; Today at 08:24 AM.
      Kensho

      Done. Moving on to life.

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    5. #79134
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      Re: Newbies Nest

      Hi Nesters!

      I'll admit, I loved it when G said I was badass the other day.. Hadn't heard that in ages, felt a bit shy and silly taking on the label, but then I thought, yeah! Badass! We certainly all are!!
      Ava and Lav, I'd forgotten about the 3 month hibernation Tool! I'm going to slide right into that one and maybe start counting from NOW.. Funny, I didn't come here first yesterday because I knew I wouldn't drink (if i'd thought at all i might, i would have come here! NS was on speed dial at work, but the thoughts left quickly) and I thought I wanted to try and get out of my low brain mode on my own. I guess I didn't want to complain about issues I knew would seem dumb to me later. But I'm very glad I ended up typing it all out afterwards last night! Your advice is wonderful, hibernation-Tool, don't worry about the friends right now, it's ok to mourn the loss of my crutch, keep my focus where it belongs!! Thank you!
      NS, you're right, it is checking in here and posting each and every day that is helping me the most.. I forgot to mention that to Belle.. it's what I do even if I'm running late to work, letting the girls sleep 10 minutes longer, not cleaning up the kitchen. After a while it became a habit and now I won't dare to miss it.. IF I miss the morning (once) I'm here in the afternoon, evening at the latest. And I'm trying my best to keep up with Lunatic Linda..as you can all see!

      Love and hugs to all,, let's make it a good one. Hump day already. xx
      Last edited by lifechange; Today at 12:49 AM.

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    7. #79135
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      Re: Newbies Nest

      Nursie - great job saying "no" and going straight home. Sometimes those two steps are all it takes to at least get past a momentary craving. Congrats on your week!

      Belle - glad to see you back. This is never a better time to quit than right now. As others have suggested, revisit the tool box, make your list, find replacements like treats or snacks that can carry you through the witching hour - whatever it takes. What are three things you've found helpful in the past? Let's get the list started right here in the Nest.

      LC - congrats on handling the dinner/outing with friends so well, especially with the glass poured and left to sit right in front of you! Sorry to hear you had such a rough day though. When we think in terms of "losing" friends or other things in life when we quit, we're setting ourselves up for disappointment and/or failure. I know I had to really choose me, choose my life and my health, over a handful of heavy drinking friends, and at the time it made me very sad. With time and distance I realized I hadn't truly lost anything when I quit drinking - instead, I gained my very best new friend (me!), my health, my self-respect, loads of time each day and night, stability, money back in my pocket... the list goes on. What have you already got on your list of gains/benefits? It sounds like you've got several layers of things going on right now, and you did an amazing job of navigating them in the midst of some hard feelings. Do you feel stronger for having held on/passed through the turbulence?

      Kensho - great job you as well! You've set the stage for an excellent trip to Italy, and you've got plenty of time to find alternatives for you and the kids.

      Ava - we had a rough summer of fires here too,sorry to hear you're dealing with them as well. Carl sure is a cutie!


      Ok, I know I'm forgetting some of the replies I wanted to post but I've fallen asleep three times in the middle of writing this so I should turn out the light and go to sleep. Catch you all tomorrow!

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    9. #79136
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      Re: Newbies Nest

      Hi, All:

      LC - I SO felt that post. The sadness and fear. I'm sorry you went through that and so glad you made it through. Thanks for sharing your feelings - we've all been there and it helps us all work through them.

      I felt so socially awkward and like I wouldn't have the same level of fun again for sure. I am happy to report from the other side that I actually do have the same level of fun, even at some dinner parties! The things that have changed are that 1) I discriminate more - I don't say yes to everything, only those things that will give me joy and 2) I leave earlier than I used to. When people start close talking, slurring, and repeating themselves, I gladly exit. I will say that it took about a year for me to feel back to myself. I was surprised that it took that long, and like Ava says the slog was WORK. In general I was glad not to be hungover or have GSR at 3 am, but I took some time figuring out who I was without my best friend. I want to tell you how long it took, because according to what I read, a lot of people give up sobriety around 3 months. Stick with it, it is SO worth it!

      Kensho - what if you just planned what you want to do in Italy, and if your husband wants to join he can? If not, so be it. My sisters went to Al Anon - they have a saying "today's expectations are tomorrow's resentments." I say be clear about what you are doing and hope he joins you. He may well go off and center his trip around alcohol, but that doesn't mean you have to! I am so jealous of your trip to Italy!

      Lav, poor cold chickens!

      Happy SOBER hump day,
      Pav

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    11. #79137
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      Re: Newbies Nest

      I read a tweet that pretty much sums up my feelings about social events: I want to be invited to all of them and go to none!!

      If feels awful to be left out but so often I don't really want to be part of it anyway and know that I'm going to be bored or annoyed. Thankfully the days of wishing I could be part of the imbibing are long gone (like Pav said, that takes time!!).

      I try to be very selective about what I say 'yes' to but some events really do feel like obligations (and I don't want to let other people down) so I go and make the best of it, driving myself so I can escape when I've had enough.

      But like Lav, Ava, and others, there is nothing wrong with hibernating for a while at the beginning of your quit or frankly, anytime you need to back off and take care of yourself. xx, NS


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    13. #79138
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      Re: Newbies Nest

      Good evening Nesters,

      Heading down to 23 degrees again tonight, Brrr! But that is precisely why I give my feathered friends a little heat on these frosty nights. No one’s feet were frozen on the roost last night
      I only do that when the temp drops below freezing.
      I baked some vegan pumpkin scones this afternoon - not bad.

      Nursie, good job ignoring the drinking thoughts, kee doing that. Good luck with your chickens, they’re messy but a lot of fun

      Hello to Pav, Kensho, Wags, NS, LC, G & everyone.
      Byrdie, are you at your trade show?

      Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

      Lav
      AF since 03/26/09
      NF since 05/19/09
      Success comes one day at a time

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      Re: Newbies Nest

      Hi everyone, just a quick drop in.

      Belle, glad you are here. You can do this if you really want to. Post here anytime you feel the urge, that really helps. Just keep after it, it takes persistence not perfection.
      Nurse, way to go, you are doing great!
      LC, way to go not drinking at that supper. Yeah, Vancouver was fun but a bit stressful around my SIL who was a bit cranky. My favourite ice cream is ALL of them. Actually I had a delicious Kulfi flavoured ice cream (cardamom, pistachio) and a chocolate cherry ice cream with real cherries. YUM
      And, yes, should are a badass like G says.

      Lav, ya it’s getting cold here too. Winter is coming

      Xo
      Narilly
      Narilly

      "Nothing in this World Can take the place of Persistence"
      "You can have the life you want OR you can Drink"

      AF April 12, 2014

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