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Thread: Newbies Nest

  1. #81181
    Forum Subscriber. narilly's Avatar

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    Re: Newbies Nest

    Happy Un Hung Tuesday everyone.

    Way to go G!! 2 years, oh yeah baby! That is a great milestone, keep up the good work amigo.

    Nora- big hugs to you

    Dee doo and Frances- good job!

    Ken, I am sure things will pick up, the world is in limbo for sure.

    Hope everyone is ok with the fires/smoke/Covid crap going on. It is smoky here today but nothing compared to everyone on the Westcoast of the U.S. and Canada.

    We went to a brewery the other night to meet an old friend and I was thinking I could have a sip of cider...but then why ruin my over 5 years of sobriety? Crazy thinking, that old AL brain still rears its head sometimes.

    It is cooling down here, winter is supposed to Suck this year. Lucky I have a crap load of warm coats, boots, mits, ear muffs, scarfs, turtlenecks etc. Crazy Canadians eh.

    Have a good one everybody and Dont drink today.
    Narilly

    "Nothing in this World Can take the place of Persistence"
    "You can have the life you want OR you can Drink"

    AF April 12, 2014

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  3. #81182
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    Re: Newbies Nest

    Hi all - hope the week is starting of well for everyone. It's mid afternoon and I'm at my desk in my pajamas. I keep saying I want to get up and "get ready" sort of like I used to pre-pandemic when I went in the office to work, but I haven't been able to get consistent about that. Lack of exercise is becoming a problem too - Ava, early morning walks sounds like the approach I should try - by afternoon I'm mentally pooped and can't get myself motivated to get out (which I know would make me feel better, but my mind says "whatever").

    Kensho - the longest I've gone AF before is 9 months. After that I had a long time (I'd have to go back to check but it was like a year or two) where I did really well and rarely drank. I have my ups and downs but once I let myself get into drinking regularly, it becomes impossible for me not to drink every day. I hate that. There's been a big pull for me over the past 4 weeks but thankfully I've resisted.

    Pav you asked if I didn't want to tell my daughter I don't drink - it did cross my mind but I didn't; not really sure if there's a particular reason - just didn't want to make it a big discussion. To be honest, as I was typing "tell my daughter I don't drink", at first I was going to type "tell my daughter I'm not drinking right now". What does that say about my mindset? I guess I have some soul searching to do.

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    Forum Subscriber. NoSugar's Avatar

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    Re: Newbies Nest

    Quote Originally Posted by narilly View Post
    We went to a brewery the other night to meet an old friend and I was thinking I could have a sip of cider...but then why ruin my over 5 years of sobriety? Crazy thinking, that old AL brain still rears its head sometimes.
    When we first are trying to quit, our brains aren't healthy enough to think 'why ruin 5 years of sobriety'. The dumb thought to have a sip pops into our minds and it seems like a COMMAND that we must obey, not an idea to question. I don't worry too much about my AL brain speaking up once in awhile now that I'm no longer under the delusion that he's in charge! I think the feeling that I wasn't in control of my decisions was one of the worst parts about being addicted. All those broken promises to myself about never again, not tonight, starting Monday for sure... It was such a confusing and tragic loop to be caught in.

    Frances, you don't have to do any soul-searching right now unless you want to. The 'one day at a time' thing can get you to the place where your brain is strong and healthy and you can make logical decisions with full awareness of the cost/benefit ratio. That's what is so skewed during addiction -- huge and growing costs with ever diminishing benefits. I personally was relieved when I decided I was done drinking for good but others find the thought of 'never' daunting and counter-productive. You get to take YOUR way out and if that is one day at a time, that's fine
    Last edited by NoSugar; September 15th, 2020 at 02:22 PM.


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  6. #81184
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    Re: Newbies Nest

    Mr G, so far, retirement has very closely resembled house arrest. I have autoimmune diseases, so I really am trying to avoid Covid at all costs. My hubs takes me and the dog for car rides occasionally, those are fun. We get to stick our heads out of the windows and let our ears flop...take in the smells. Then sometimes, we get a treat!

    Like NS, once I took the choice out of it, things actually got easier. It’s the choice that kills us, after all, if you are on a diet, wouldn’t you rather have pizza than kale? It was a relief not to have to choose. I made a decision and then found a way to make it work, Once I decided on the solution, the problem became more manageable, my actions supported the solution (not the problem) Hope that makes sense.

    Wags, thank you for checking in. My heart aches for all of you effected by these fires, and the folks in the gulf With Hurricane Sally. The ole US is on her knees.

    Fall is in the air here today, too, Lav. Such a relief from the oppressive heat and humidity.

    Today is my new brother’s birthday. He is 60. You may recall I discovered my mom had a 36 year affair with our family doctor. This brother is the illegitimate son of his nurse. He was born on my mother’s birthday. This son looks just like the doctor, too. What a web, my mother must have felt so betrayed by the doctor, who was also having an affair with his nurse, and then gave birth on her birthday. Sheesh.

    Hope everyone is having an easy day. Hugs to all, Byrdie
    All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
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    Newbie's Nest

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  8. #81185
    Registered User. available's Avatar

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    Re: Newbies Nest

    morning nesters

    I hope everyone near the fires is staying safe and there is some relief soon.

    Frances, it is working for me these morning works, i still feel guilty i am not working but it certainly clears my head and i get out of my pj's earlier lol. Carl has some Covid weight to lose and i have menopause weight that i want to keep stable as that is not shifting in a hurry.

    Nar, i think of having a glass sometimes but then think why. Moreso with the pandemic but ffs there is no way i could ever do a day 1 again after all of this time and i know i dont want to, i dont want to go back to those dark days again and i have the tools to stop myself. As we all say, they are just thoughts.

    Today i am going into work, kind of looking forward to it and kind of not. i wont get much work done which means i will be working when i get home but it will be nice to see everyone and talk. i am meeting with the new Head today to discuss my work role so that will be interesting. He mentioned to the PA that we desk share, now if the desk is 80 metres long that sounds like a great idea to me! A work in progress.

    Well off to start the day. take care and be safe xx
    AF free 1st December 2013 - 1st December 2019 - 6 years of living the way i should have always done

    Ava is a SHPFFFDU ! (Special, honest, practical, fantastic friend from downunder) - thank you NS

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    Forum Subscriber. Lavande's Avatar

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    Re: Newbies Nest

    Greetings Nesters,

    It’s getting darker so much earlier now & I don’t feel safe walking my dog down this country road after dinner so I’ll be switching back to morning walks myself. We both need the exercise, no kidding!!!

    Wags, glad you checked in but so sorry about the air quality. I just saw a pice on the news about the current conditions. Stay safe

    Kensho, I know my daughter is keeping a close eye on my granddaughter’s virtual classes & assignments but I’m pretty sure my daughter-in-law is not doing the same for my grandsons. I can’t get involved or risk having my head bitten off. I just hope the boys are paying some attention. Your biz just may be the thing people need right now to help them make their living/working quarters comfortqable.

    Narilly, I just keep sending ‘those thoughts’ right out of my head as soon as I notice them, then’s there’s no fighting with myself. I much prefer the mind peace

    Frances, choose the peaceful life/mind & you’ll have no regrets!

    NS, are you still sewing masks? The local hospital put out another request yesterday for sewers so I stopped & picked up the ‘kit’ which looks like I’ll be doing about 60 for them like I did in the early spring. They are gearing up for a nasty fall/winter season.

    Byrdie, we took a ride to load up on chicken feed, haha & stopped at a very safe place for lunch. It was nice for a change.

    Ava, I hope everything works out to your satisfaction at work. Work is work & it will never be perfect, we all know that much!

    Hello to everyone & wishing a safe night in the nest for all!

    Lav
    AF since 03/26/09
    NF since 05/19/09
    Success comes one day at a time

  10. #81187
    Forum Subscriber. NoraC's Avatar

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    Re: Newbies Nest

    Hello everyone.
    My Mom passed away yesterday. Thank you all for your love and support. It helps.
    She is with my Dad again.

    I'll be back tomorrow.
    "Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.".....Carol Burnett
    ..........
    AF - 7-27-15

  11. #81188
    Registered User. available's Avatar

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    Re: Newbies Nest

    Nora, i am thinking of you and sending you hugs. I am sorry to hear about your loss of your mum. xxxx
    AF free 1st December 2013 - 1st December 2019 - 6 years of living the way i should have always done

    Ava is a SHPFFFDU ! (Special, honest, practical, fantastic friend from downunder) - thank you NS

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  13. #81189
    Forum Subscriber. abcowboy's Avatar

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    So sorry to hear about your mom @NoraC, my thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family...
    Quitting and staying quit isnít easy, itís learning a whole new way of thinking. Itís accepting a new way of life, and not just accepting it, embracing it...
    Worry about tomorrow, tomorrow. Just get through today. Tomorrow will look after itself when it becomes today, because today is all we have to think about.
    Friendship is not about how many friends you have or who you've known the longest. It's about who walked into your life, said "I'm here for you", and proved it.

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  15. #81190
    Registered User. Pavati's Avatar

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    Re: Newbies Nest

    Hi, All:

    Nora, I am sending you virtual hugs and love. So sorry for your loss, and I am glad you will both be at peace now.

    Wags, I think the situation is Oregon is worse than CA, especially the smoke. We had bad smoke here, but not as bad, and it was SO stressful. There is no exercise, no opening a window for fresh air, no fresh air. I am thinking of you and your state, and the whole west. And the gulf coast. What a mess. I am hoping for rain and wind in the right direction.

    Nar, I get that from time to time. Good thing we don't drink so we don't act on it.

    Frances, I get what you're saying. I hear what NoSugar is saying, but I would say it was both for me - it is a paradox. I had to be willing to take it one day at a time, AND I had to be willing to accept the fact I can't drink. I tried not to think too far into the future, but I also had to accept that it was off the table for me FOREVER. That way I wasn't thinking about it all of the time. Acceptance has helped me in many other ways. You got this!

    I've been doing a 30 day yoga challenge every morning. - about 25-30 minute sessions. I am NOT a morning exerciser, but it helps wake me up and I have found muscles I had lost in quarantine.

    Happy SOBER Hump Day,
    Pav

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